web analytics
October 23, 2014 / 29 Tishri, 5775
At a Glance
Blogs
Sponsored Post
Meir Panim with Soldiers 5774 Roundup: Year of Relief and Service for Israel’s Needy

Meir Panim implements programs that serve Israel’s neediest populations with respect and dignity. Meir Panim also coordinated care packages for families in the South during the Gaza War.



A Lesson In Balancing…

An hour later -- I kid you not, the hospital called. The surgery is in less than 2 week...

Top_doctors

I’ve spent the last few days canceling things that I had carefully arranged – meetings, seminars, events…it’s kind of depressing. At the same time, there is a side of me that stands on the side and watches with interest. This is a new me that I’ve never met before. It’s rarely in my life been about me.

It’s an interesting, almost humbling experience. I almost always over-extend myself, take on more than I can handle…but in the end, I really do manage…usually with help…to accomplish it. I’m more likely to shlep something too heavy than ask for help; more likely to over-commit to something and then feel resentful.

There was a great line in a Harry Chapin song (yes, I’m a forever fan of his). There were so many points to that song, but one of the lines was about some people (in the song, it was boys) who were taught to reach for the stars, while others (in the song, it was girls) were told to reach for the shelves. So, forgetting the boy/girl thing here – I know a lot of people who reach for the shelves and live perfectly happy lives. For some reason, I’m someone who reaches for the stars. At least I think I am…so, the last few days have been humbling because not only are the stars out of reach, so too is the shelf.

I fell something like four months ago on my way home from work. I thought I’d broken something and was happy to find that I hadn’t – what I did do, was rip the heck out of my rotator cuff and it isn’t going to get better without surgery.

I got the name of a top doctor – and was then told he could do the surgery in November. Well, I was really honored to have met him, to have him want to do the surgery…but from June to November is a lifetime when you are in pain, not sleeping, and you know that the surgery is only the first step…which will be followed by months of physical therapy.

November??? How was it possible?  I’m spending my life barely sleeping and controlling how I move. I can’t lift heavy things with my left arm; trying to control a shopping cart has brought me to tears. If it takes two hands to do it, I’m accepted that I’m limited.

I managed to take the garbage out on Friday – I was so proud of myself. I lifted it with my right hand, barely using my left…careful, easy…all’s well – and then as my right hand expertly held the garbage aloft, my left hand reached out to the side to close the front door – OUCH…I can’t move my left hand that way!

I can write; I can type – all that takes place at or below elbow level is fine so long as it doesn’t involve lifting or moving my left arm towards my back (or even the side).

And while I was learning to copy, I was walking around complaining, thinking of trying to find the second or third or fourth best doctor in the country – anything not to have to wait until November, when my daughter called the miracle rabbi back. This is an amazing man who spends his life matching patient to doctor and then, pushes “his” person right at the doctor and says – heal this person now! And, the doctor does.

So this rabbi got us an appointment with the #1 doctor… and then, when we thought the surgery was only going to be in November – we called the rabbi back… disappointed, discouraged…ready to give up – please, we know he’s busy – give us another name. Wait, said the rabbi.

An hour later — I kid you not, the hospital called. The surgery is in less than 2 weeks and so now, I realize that I was reconciled to November… I have plans…I scheduled things…now what?

No, I can’t teach that course.

No, I can’t make that meeting.

No, you can hold that event, but I won’t be there.

Will I make it to the synagogue on Rosh Hashana? Will I be able to get myself dressed? Stand that long? Forget holding a prayer book…turning a page.

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

6 Responses to “A Lesson In Balancing…”

  1. Batya Spiegelman Medad says:

    this isn't my article.

  2. Batya Spiegelman Medad says:

    the Jewish Press goofed up. They'll fix it soon I hope.

  3. Ouch! Refuah Shlayma Paula!.
    K'tiva v'chatima tova.
    Reva Van Leeuwen

  4. Batya Spiegelman Medad says:

    Refuah shleimah Paula R. Stern. You'll soon be back, better than ever, G-d willing.

  5. Leah Zakh Aharoni says:

    Refua shlema, paula. these enforced breaks are hard!

  6. Leah Zakh Aharoni says:

    Refua shlema, paula. these enforced breaks are hard!

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu, Jerusalem Mayor Nir Barkat meet with security officials over Oct. 22 terror attack.
Netanyahu Convenes Top Brass in Jerusalem Over Terror Attack
Latest Blogs Stories
Chaye Zisel Braun

Arab terrorism against Jews and the State of Israel is not something we should be “calm” about.

European Union

Is the EU “Jewish challenged”?

Car in Light Rail Runover

The headlines refused to scream “ARAB TERROR ATTACK;” instead the phrase “Suspected Terror Attack.”

"Shiloh"

I’ve heard many times I write what others think, making them extremely happy; that’s why I continue.

Though secular, Hitman’s CV includes writing music for, recording, and popularizing religious songs.

Polls indicate that the Palestinians are much more against a two state solution than the Israelis.

Has the Jewish world adapted to the times? Hear the answer with Doug and his guest, Rabbi Berel Wein.

Leon Klinghoffer’s daughters: “‘Klinghoffer’ is justified as ‘a work of art’…This is an outrage.”

Kids bring in the light and let out the darkness through breathing exercises; it changes people.

If I make a million dollars in 2 weeks, how can I observe something like this and sit by quietly?”

Sometimes collective action against the heinous acts of the majority is not enough. The world should not only support the blockade of Gaza; it must enforce the dismantling of Hamas.

How long will it take for Israel and the Jewish World to admit that we are in very serious danger?

How do changes in technology affect the human life and our interactions with each other?

Palestinians (and Jordanians) often use the term “provocation” regarding Israeli action in Jerusalem

The zealots who engineered the ban have been publicly disgraced.

I am sick and tired of this one way street boycott! Time to boycott all products developed or invented in the Palestinian controlled areas! Let’s start with……umm….

More Articles from Paula Stern
candles on tracks

I love that most of my kids don’t actually read this blog – it gives me a freedom.

KL Majdanek. Mglisty paŸdziernikowy poranek 2008

The smell may be gone, but the air remains poisoned by the hatred.

My son continues to move slowly towards the army while working to complete his final year in high school.

It’s a strange feeling to known that a missile is flying towards your country and there is nothing you can do about it.

I’ll start by explaining that in Israel, a common phrase is “yehiye b’seder” – it will be okay.

At one point the Dr. asked me if I was famous because of the blog…

There are ashes that remain in the ovens, ashes piled into a mountain in Maidanek.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/blogs/a-soldiers-mother/a-lesson-in-balancing/2013/08/11/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: