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September 29, 2016 / 26 Elul, 5776
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VINTAGE FISHMAN

Warning! Xmas!

If you think that living in a Xtrian land doesn’t affect you at all, it’s because your brain has been so saturated with dreams of white Christmases.


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Thank God that my children have never heard the seductive carols of Christmas time, the Silent Nights and Joy to the Worlds, whose poisonous melodies are so powerful that I still remember their verses until this day.

Thank God that my children aren’t surrounded my Christmas trees and mangers and Santa Clauses wherever they go. Thank God that they don’t confuse the Jewish holidays with all the commercialization and sales extravaganzas that mark the birth of the Christian world’s false messiah.

In Israel, if you didn’t get on the bus to Bethlehem, you’d never know it was Christmas. It doesn’t exist. Who needs it? Who Cares? Because this is the only Jewish country in the world. This is the Holy Land. In Monsey, or Borough Park, or any other Jewish ghetto throughout the Diaspora, walk fifty yards in any direction, and you’ll discover a Xmas lights and a manger. Turn on the TV and Christmas is all you see. In high schools and colleges all over America and England and France, Jewish boys are kissing gentile girls under mistletoes and exchanging stockings filled with prophylactics and cocaine.

Thank God, I’m in Israel. Thank God that my children are growing up amongst Jews. Thank God, I don’t have to get my kids a Christmas tree so they don’t feel left out and different from the gentiles.

If you think that I’m exaggerating and that living in a Xtrian land doesn’t affect you at all, it’s because your brain has been so saturated with dreams of white Christmases and Perry Como, Andy Williams, Nat King Cole, Tom Jones, Barbra Streisand, Jonny Mathis, Elvis Presley, Michael Jackson, Bob Dylan, Xmas songs that it has become sour pickled in the formaldehyde of Xtrian culture.

This is my Xmas wish to all of my readers – may Santa’s reindeer take a flying poo on everyone’s Xmas. Peace on earth and goodwill to men.

Tzvi Fishman

About the Author: Tzvi Fishman was awarded the Israel Ministry of Education Prize for Creativity and Jewish Culture for his novel "Tevye in the Promised Land." A wide selection of his books are available at Amazon. His recent movie "Stories of Rebbe Nachman" The DVD of the movie is available online.

The author's opinion does not necessarily reflect the opinion of The Jewish Press.

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Tzvi Fishman, author of the Jewish Press blog Felafel on Rye and author of more than a dozen books.
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