web analytics
September 2, 2014 / 7 Elul, 5774
At a Glance
Blogs
Sponsored Post
Jerusalem Mayor Nir Barkat (L) visits the JewishPress.com booth at The Event. And the Winners of the JewishPress.com Raffle Are…

Congratulations to all the winners of the JewishPress.com raffle at The Event



Three Reasons Why You Should Not Help Your Children Buy a Home or Apartment

Doug Goldstein

What is the greatest present that you can give your children when they get married?

In certain communities, the answer is, “an apartment.” Many parents take on second or third mortgages, sell their own homes, or bury themselves in debt to make sure that an apartment comes along with the trousseau. While they may not be looking forward to paying off huge debts at an age when most people are retired, they will probably sigh and tell you that these days, you can’t find a decent match for your child unless it includes an apartment as well.

But in fact, there are three reasons why buying an apartment can be detrimental for you and your children:

You can’t afford it

You may jeopardize your retirement. You have worked all your life to support your family, providing your children with an education and everything they need to grow into fine, responsible citizens. As you grow older, your children should move on to support themselves and the savings that you have put aside can be used for your golden years.

You need to be fair to your children –don’t give to one unless you can give the same amount to all. Buying an extra apartment can be costly. If you have more than one child, huge resentment can arise between them if only one of them got the free apartment.

Not everyone is doing it

Although the rumor mills may say “everyone buys the bride an apartment,” it is just not true. I have been a financial advisor both in New York and in Israel and I have seen what goes on firsthand. Some folks help, and some don’t. This is very much a matter of individual choice.

If your future in-laws pressure you, just say no. Tell them your financial planner advised against it. You do not need to be forced into putting yourself into heavy debt to pay for an additional apartment that you really can‘t afford.

Would you sell your daughter for camels?

If the parents of your child’s intended absolutely refuse to marry their child to yours unless you pay up, are you really interested in this match anyway? We live in the modern world where people marry based on mutual goals, dreams, and love. If the other side’s main priority is how much money you have (and are willing to spend on the wedding/apartment), rather than your child’s sterling personal qualities, the future may not shine so bright.

Rather than putting yourself into debt or spending your retirement savings, encourage the young couple to build their home and future together on their own two feet. Their teamwork building their own home (both physical and spiritual) will create more of an everlasting edifice than even the most luxurious apartment from you.

If you want to know more about when it’s wrong to gift to your children, read Gifting Money to Children – Right or Wrong.

About the Author: Douglas Goldstein, CFP®, is the director of Profile Investment Services, Ltd, a financial planning firm located in Jerusalem. He specializes in working with clients in New York, Florida, and Israel and is a licensed financial professional both in the U.S. and Israel. Securities are offered through Portfolio Resources Group, Inc., Member FINRA, SIPC, MSRB, SIFMA. Accounts held at Pershing LLC., Member NYSE/SIPC, a subsidiary of The Bank of New York Mellon Corporation. Neither Profile nor PRG gives tax or legal advice. Before immigrating to Israel, it is advisable to consult with a tax attorney who is knowledgeable about Israeli law. Doug’s newest book The Expatriates’ Guide to Handling Money and Taxes is available at www.expatguidetomoney.com. He hosts a weekly finance show, Goldstein on Gelt, on internet radio. Listen live or download podcasts. Toll-free from U.S. 1-888-327-6179, Jerusalem: (02) 624-2788. Follow on Twitter: @DougGoldstein or contact at doug@profile-financial.com.


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Three Reasons Why You Should Not Help Your Children Buy a Home or Apartment”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Douglas Goldstein
Current Top Story
Former PM Ehud Olmert at Tel Aviv District Court hears his sentence on May 13, 2014. (archive)
Ehud Olmert’s ‘Talansky Affair’ Re-Opens in Jerusalem District Court
Latest Blogs Stories
paramedikit-3

“I knew that being there would allow me to protect other soldiers.”

Kerry Repeats

JoeSettler asks what could still possibly be on the negotiating table with the PA after a summer like we just had…

Kurdistan Crisis

You did not want to listen because you could not blame my Israel.

iphone

Now everyone has easy access to the culture and all of its vices, both social and intellectual.

Connect the dots, please: All of these Muslim Arab terror organizations are connected.

“…while Hamas has been weakened it has not been destroyed…”

Jewish donors bought and donated the greenhouses to the Palestinians.

This week’s podcast discusses the need for transparency in international business dealings.

The new “Begin Plan” is an impending nightmare, it rewards the Bedouins for brazen land-grabbing.

There is absolutely nothing for Israel’s security in this American document.

Is it because of corrupt values and lack of meeting opportunities that we have a shidduch crisis?

Israel is fighting the war that none of the Western world has the ability or courage to fight.

Finish the job! Sayyem et a missima!סיים את המסימה!

Life after 50? You better believe it! Tips on how to prepare and enjoy life after retirement.

While I am no fan of the two-state solution, I think I have a solution for the Gaza strip. Let me make it perfectly clear that in no way do I believe a Palestinian people, nation or Arab State ever existed in the history of the world and certainly was not occupied by Israel. If […]

Hamas targeted the Erez Crossing when it knew that Gazans and Israeli Arabs would be there, out in the open…

More Articles from Doug Goldstein, CFP®
Goldstein 485x300

This week’s podcast discusses the need for transparency in international business dealings.

Doug Goldstein

Life after 50? You better believe it! Tips on how to prepare and enjoy life after retirement.

Marriage is not just about emotional fidelity but about financial fidelity as well.

Discussion on recent changes to Social Security benefits and how it will effect you.

Doug speaks with World Chess Cahmpion Magnus Carlsen.

Do Keynesian theories about government spending still apply today?

How can you prevent emotional baggage from holding you back?

This week Doug speaks with David S. Rose, entrepreneur, former angel investor, and founder of Gust.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/blogs/goldstein-on-gelt/three-reasons-why-you-should-not-help-your-children-buy-a-home-or-apartment/2012/06/27/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: