…children who are spinning out of control, and who refuse any form of intervention, must understand that there are gedorim, red flags and lines which cannot be crossed while still using the home as a base once they have gone off the derech. There is no unconditional love in these circumstances. When a child does not want any help from therapists, psychologists, social workers, family members, rabbonim, he/she cannot expect that his/her parents will love him as before. Such a child must know and feel that the door is always open as long as he/she opens a pesach shel machat.
Having dealt firsthand with similar situations for over sixteen years, it is our very strong recommendation to parents that their message to their OTD child and his/her siblings be one of unconditional love with no exceptions. Love does not mean acceptance. It means that the place our children hold in our hearts is not diminished regardless of how much they disappoint or even hurt us.
About the Author: Harry Maryles runs the blog "Emes Ve-Emunah" which focuses on current events and issues that effect the Jewish world in general and Orthodoxy in particular. It discuses Hashkafa and news events of the day - from a Centrist perspctive and a philosphy of Torah U'Mada. He can be reached at email@example.com.The author's opinion does not necessarily reflect the opinion of The Jewish Press.
If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.
Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.
If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.
Imported and Older Comments:
- Israel Approves Reconstruction for 1,500 Homes in Gaza
on January 22, 2017 1:56 AM
- Palestinian Authority ‘Congratulates’ President Donald Trump With Mixed Messages [video]
on January 21, 2017 11:48 PM
- Israeli President Reuven Rivlin Congratulates US President Donald Trump
on January 21, 2017 11:31 PM
- Arabs Attack Israeli Motorists Near Efrat
on January 21, 2017 10:56 PM
- Trump Exercises Presidential Pen to Issue ‘Executive Order’ No. 1
on January 21, 2017 10:47 PM
- Israeli Driver to become NASCAR’s First Full-Time Jewish Driver
on January 21, 2017 9:57 PM
- Full Text: Inaugural Speech of US President Donald J. Trump [video]
on January 21, 2017 8:38 PM
- Watch: Netanyahu Tells Iranian People, ‘We Are your Friend, Not your Enemy’ [video]
on January 21, 2017 8:28 PM
- IDF Chief of Staff Released from Hospital
on January 21, 2017 8:19 PM
- Deadly Shooting in Tel Aviv
on January 21, 2017 7:28 PM
- Rabbi Marvin Heir’s Prayer at Inauguration of US President Donald J. Trump [video]
on January 21, 2017 7:15 PM
- Enterprising Builder Thrilled About US Embassy Move to Jerusalem
on January 20, 2017 4:34 PM
- Inauguration Day Has Arrived for President-elect Donald J. Trump
on January 20, 2017 3:20 PM
- Poll: Overwhelming Majority of Israelis Ready for Sovereignty in Judea and Samaria
on January 20, 2017 2:53 PM
- ‘Open Orthodox’ Rabbi Alters Shabbat Prayer for the President to Omit Trump
on January 20, 2017 2:36 PM