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Question: My young daughter was recently diagnosed with autism. She does not function well socially and is extremely introverted, but we have noticed that she reacts very well to small animals. We reported this to her therapist who suggested that we get a dog or cat as a pet. We know that most religious people frown upon having pets, but we hate to see our daughter suffer and want to do anything that would make her happy. Would it be okay to own a pet in the circumstances we described?

Her Loving Parents
(Via E-Mail)

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Answer: You might be surprised to learn that you are not alone in your dilemma. In fact, I personally know religiously observant families facing similar problems. And in your case, withholding a pet from your child when it offers her the possibility of happiness and contentment may well be the wrong thing to do.

Let us first review the potential benefits of pets for autistic children. An article published in The New York Times some time ago (10-20-2010) highlighted the Anderson Center, a year-round residence and school for children and young adults, ages 5 to 21, with moderate to severe autistic symptoms. One of the center’s therapies utilizes dogs. “We are not trying to make these kids become dog lovers,” explained Austin Dr. Rynne, director of Health and Related Services at the school. “We want to use the dogs as a medium to achieve our pre-existing educational goals.”

Because many children with autism tend to inhabit a private inner world, constructing a bridge to that world is essential, said Dr. Rynne. He explained that dog therapy was doing just that for some students. He offered the case of an 11-year-old boy who had been at the Anderson Center for three years as an example. He was non-verbal, only communicating by pointing to pictures. When he was first introduced to the center’s trained dog Shadow, he refused to enter the same room as her and would run away if she looked at him. One year later, though, that same boy requested the opportunity to walk, pet, and feed Shadow. Dr. Rynne explained that interacting with the dog helped the boy develop communication skills that can be transferred to relationships with peers and teachers. And when this boy became frustrated and threw a tantrum, Shadow’s calming presence seemed to help him regain his self-control.

Another interesting example is Dutchess, a golden retriever who loves people, tennis balls, and treats, and was “born to be a therapy dog,” according to her owner and handler, Mark Condon, a biology professor at Dutchess Community College in Poughkeepsie, NY. A 16-year-old boy with verbal and aggression problems relied on caregivers or teachers to lead his social interaction, a condition called prompt-dependent. After he began therapy with Dutchess, though, the boy became more functionally independent.

Based on these and so many other widely published cases, it seems that we must apply the Sages’ statement (Bava Kamma 79b), “Ein gozrin gezeirah al ha’tzibbur ela im yecholin rov ha’tzibbur la’amod bo – We do not issue decrees on the public if by and large they cannot withstand such impositions.” Your situation, and that of many others, seems to demand a lenient, non-dogmatic approach.

Nevertheless, it’s known that the overwhelming attitude toward pet ownership in our community has always been one of disdain.

(To be continued)

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Rabbi Yaakov Klass is Rav of K’hal Bnei Matisyahu in Flatbush; Torah Editor of The Jewish Press; and Presidium Chairman, Rabbinical Alliance of America/Igud HaRabbonim.