web analytics
July 1, 2015 / 14 Tammuz, 5775
At a Glance
Judaism
Sponsored Post


The Struggle

Lessons-logo

Once a week or so some of my friends and I get together for activities and a little socializing. Over time I have gone through some personal changes and growth, and I sometimes feel out of place with these girls, some of whom I have known for years. I experienced a real struggle during a recent get-together that will surely have a long-lasting impact on me.

The night before I met the girls I attended a most inspirational shiur regarding tznius. The woman speaker talked about taking on new levels of commitment in Torah observance while asking Hashem, in the merit of our actions, for the zechus of earning His assistance. I decided that I would take upon myself the challenge of changing something that had been especially difficult for me to do: wearing stockings or shoes that cover my feet.

As the evening with my friends wore on, I began to feel that it was time to get home and that I had made a mistake in attending. Many friends of mine, though really good at heart, were still wearing miniskirts, tight shirts and other inappropriate clothing. This saddened me, making me feel that I didn’t belong. I felt differently around my friends, unable to be my old carefree self for which they had once loved me. I kept wondering if I had made a mistake in taking on this new way of dressing.

As I said goodbye and started to walk away, a girl I barely knew approached me with tearful eyes, asked me why I was leaving and begged me to stay. I was overwhelmed, wondering why she cared so much if I left. I was surprised because I felt that my presence there wasn’t making much of a difference. I encouraged the girl to spend more time with the other girls, who were eating together in the restaurant. I told her that I have known the girls for a long time and that they are really nice people.

She then said something that truly startled me. “I don’t want to spend time with those girls, who don’t know how to dress. I don’t want to be their friend. Please stay.” All along I was feeling like I stood out in a bad way. But I realized that in reality the way I had dressed represented something to be emulated.

Deeply touched by her words, I hugged her. We reentered the restaurant to join the girls. That night I felt a change inside myself; instead of feeling like an embarrassment I saw myself with respect – as a “bas melech.” I felt a wonderful sense of personal strength, conviction and love for others.

It’s one thing to learn about repairing the world and being an am kadosh; it’s something else to be willing to actually act alone by dressing differently in front of a cohesive bunch of teenagers. I am glad I had the courage to do it.

I thanked Hashem for bringing me to that moment. I had struggled and grown, praying to be able to have many more moments in the future like that one.

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “The Struggle”

Comments are closed.

Current Top Story
Senator Chuck Schumer (D-NY)
Pro-Israel Group: Tell Chuck Schumer Not to Cave [video]
Latest Judaism Stories
Staum-062615

Amalek, our ultimate foe, understood that when unified, we are invincible and indestructible.

Torat-Hakehillah-logo-NEW

Perhaps on a deeper level, the mitzvah of parah adumah at this junction was not just to purify the body, but the spirit as well.

Rabbi Avi Weiss

Halacha isn’t random; it’s a mechanism guiding individuals and society to a higher ethical plateau.

Q-A-Klass-logo

Question: Should we wash our hands in the bathroom with soap and water, or by pouring water from a vessel with handles three times, alternating hands? I have heard it said that a vessel is used only in the morning upon awakening. What are the rules pertaining to young children? What is the protocol if no vessel is available? Additionally, may we dry our hands via an electric dryer?

Harry Koenigsberg
(Via E-Mail)

Less clear, however, is whether the concept applies to the area of civil law such as the law of transfer of property.

The greatest of men, Moshe, had to wait for Hashem to sprinkle purifying waters on Bnei Yisrael to mark the conclusion of the period of death.

My Plate, My Food
‘My Loaf Is Forbidden To You’
(Nedarim 34b)

Of Chukkim “Satan and the nations of the world made fun.” They may appear irrational & superstitious

I realized from this story that I was sent as a messenger from above. Hashem has many helpers in this world to help do his work.

Tosafos answers that nevertheless the sprinkling is a part of his taharah process.

“What difference does that make?” replied Shraga. “What counts is the agreement that we made. I said two hundred fifty and you accepted.”

Zaidie’s legacy of smiles and loving words was all but buried with him, now the family fights over $

Israel’s complaining frustrated Moshe, making it increasingly hard for him to lead effectively

Dovid’s musical Torah teachings were designed to penetrate the soul and the emotions.

It occurred to me, as my brain rattled in my skull on a two-hundred mile ride through rural Virginia, that our souls work in much the same way.

More Articles from Name Withheld Upon Request
Lessons-in-Emunah-new

Because of the way the piece of my finger had been severed, the doctors at the hospital were not able to reattach it. They told me I’d have to see a specialist.

Lessons-in-Emunah-new

Mommy, please don’t be so sad. Here in the next world Hashem Yisborach’s plan is much clearer.

There is not even a shadow of doubt that without Agudat Efrat’s help, this child would not have been born.

The highway was packed with bumper-to-bumper traffic, and there I sat with hands gripped tightly on the steering wheel, begging the cars to move. My heart swelled at the thought of seeing my son, who was just coming back from his year of learning in Eretz Yisrael. How I had missed him! Though I was used to him being away (if you can ever really get used to a child being away), a special space in my heart was empty – as I waited for him.

We live in a world that is often too cruel and unkind. Living in Israel for the last 30 years, I have attended too many funerals for those whose lives were taken through incomprehensible acts of terror. During the years of the second intifada there were many days that I found it impossible to continue teaching, as a student would burst into my classroom and announce that there had been another terrorist attack. How could I just go on with a regular lesson when lives were lost?

Once a week or so some of my friends and I get together for activities and a little socializing. Over time I have gone through some personal changes and growth, and I sometimes feel out of place with these girls, some of whom I have known for years. I experienced a real struggle during a recent get-together that will surely have a long-lasting impact on me.

The Schwartzes had three vehicles but only two drivers. At any given time the third vehicle, the 2005 red Ford van, could be seen on different driveways throughout the neighborhood – and sometimes even in Miami Beach and Hollywood, Florida. The Schwartzes kept a third vehicle, knowing that not everyone had a car.

In 2001, the year of the 9/11 terrorist attacks, my husband and I were both in mourning for close relatives. As a woman, I did not have the responsibility of attending a minyan to recite Kaddish. So I never realized how complicated it could get.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/judaism/jewish-columns/lessons-in-emunah/the-struggle/2013/01/03/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: