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May 26, 2013 /17 Sivan, 5773
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The Tosfos Yomtov was convinced that the death of 300,000 –600,000 Jews during the Chmielnicki massacres of 1648-49 were because of improper Tefila. Communicated: Tefilla

Chillul Tefila Bifarhesia, as well as halachicly challenged verbiage and dress, are external manifestations of a critical lack of personal yiras shomayim which has lethal consequences.



The Tenth Man

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He asked me out for a second date and I eagerly agreed to see him the following Sunday. All was well with the world.

Except for one thing. I still had a date with number nine scheduled for the following evening. We went out, but my heart was not in it. Although the boy was just as lovely as he had been on our first date, the mood was not right, and we decided not to continue seeing one another.

Back to number ten. We spent the entire Sunday together, and had a fabulous time. Ditto the next Sunday. And the next. I think you get the general idea.

To make a long story somewhat short, the rest is history. I ended up marrying number ten after all.

Now we really have to fast forward, as much has transpired in the interim.

My number ten date and I recently celebrated our lev (32nd) anniversary, kein yirbu, and are the proud parents of ten beautiful children, kein ayin hara, and half a dozen grandchildren, kein yirbu.

After more than three decades and many shared experiences together – some challenging, but most wonderful – our phone conversations remain by far the weakest link in our relationship. Truth to tell, I still have not learned to enunciate – and now our hearing is going as well!

But I can live with that. As far as I am concerned, my tenth man is most definitely, absolutely, positively a ten!

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It was a lovely summer night in the Holy Land. My husband and I, and a dozen or so of our colleagues, straggled into our hotel, exhausted but exhilarated after a long action-packed day of touring and activities. As we entered the lobby, we heard the unmistakable melodic strains of a piano being played in an adjacent room.

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There were three names with brief bios on the list. All had similar qualities and were within the correct age and frumkeit range. With nothing to distinguish one from the others, we could have enlisted the tried-and-true option of “Eeny, meeny, miny, moe…” Instead, we decided to base our decision on practical and geographic considerations. So we opted to go with the candidate from Teaneck, New Jersey, reasonably close in proximity to our son’s apartment in Edison.

We were literally in “seventh” heaven. The Sabbatical year in Eretz Yisrael was almost too good to be true. My husband was enjoying a rare break from his hectic schedule of teaching and administrating and was thrilled to be able to instead sit on the other side of the desk, quenching his perpetual thirst for knowledge. The entire family felt blessed to have so much heretofore unheard of quality time with Abba, while living in the Promised Land and participating in frequent exciting family activities and touring opportunities with the program. We unanimously agreed that our proverbial cup had indeed runneth over.

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I almost never met the man I married.

No, I am not from a very strict chassidishe home where dating is taboo and a brief meeting suffices before the engagement is announced. My husband and I actually dated for a few months, by which time my parents were beginning to grow concerned and the neighbors were having a heyday gossiping about us. But if not for a significant helping of siyata dishmaya, we never would have managed to get together in the first place.

As I sit at my home computer typing these words, virtual gale-force winds are blowing through my apartment, filling it with fresh – and free – air. This has not always been the case. In fact the electric bill for the past two months was astronomical, due in large part to our high usage of air conditioning virtually around the clock.

I know what you’re thinking. You have already concluded that this is one of those heartwarming stories about the anonymous tenth man who completes a minyan in some far-off region, under mysterious, if not downright miraculous, circumstances. Likely as not, he turns out to be Eliyahu Hanavi.

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