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October 31, 2014 / 7 Heshvan, 5775
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A Parent’s Anguish


Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

And now to my immediate problem: Another simcha is coming. Their daughter – our granddaughter – is getting married. The invitations went out and while my husband and I received one, no one else in the family did. Whenever we’ve attended any of their simchas we’ve been treated very shabbily and have come to accept this. But we are at the point, having experienced this horrible divide, this sinas chinam, for so long, where we can no longer suffer silently.

The poison has infected the entire family. As mentioned, we have all tried to reach out with love. We apologized if we ever hurt them, even unknowingly. We wrote them letters. We sent them e-mails. No response. None. Meanwhile the simcha is fast approaching. Should my husband and I allow ourselves to be exposed to more shame? Should we countenance this cruelty?

We have to make a decision as to what we should do. Our options are the following: Attend and became part of this disgrace; decline the invitation; play sick; leave town and offer some excuse.

Please answer this letter in your column so that my son and/or daughter-in-law will read it.

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