web analytics
October 1, 2014 / 7 Tishri, 5775
At a Glance
Judaism
Sponsored Post
Meir Panim with Soldiers 5774 Roundup: Year of Relief and Service for Israel’s Needy

Meir Panim implements programs that serve Israel’s neediest populations with respect and dignity. Meir Panim also coordinated care packages for families in the South during the Gaza War.



I Am Saddened (Part One)


Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

Dear Rebbetzin Jungreis:

Once again, Yom Tov has come and gone. I was hoping that with all the things going on in the world, people would have learned something…or at least would want to change. My glimmer of hope has faded – I have always loved people and have been a people person. Lately however, to put it mildly, I am beginning to wonder what it is all about. One would think that, in light of all the tragedies that constantly assail us – illness, untimely deaths, broken homes, financial stress and global anti-Semitism, people would wake up…but no such thing. Instead of becoming nicer, kinder, I see chutzpah growing by leaps and bounds.

So why am I writing to you? Simply put, I have always viewed your columns as a vital and accurate sounding board on the issues of our day. I have been reading your articles over the years and found them to be always on target, so I thought I would write to you now in the hope that you would publish my letter and perhaps some people would understand and join me in calling for a change. The changes I am hoping for are within our reach and realistic. They are not contingent upon Washington, Jerusalem or the UN, but depend solely upon us, so allow me to get to my concerns.

Usually, we stay at home for Pesach – our family likes it that way, but this year, events compelled us to go away. I was aghast and ashamed at what I saw. Among the passengers on our plane was a group of 150 people, all headed for the same resort. Their behavior was embarrassing – true, just a few were guilty, but they gave a terrible impression of our people. I overheard flight attendants saying to one another, “What a night this will be with them on board…those people!” So what, you might ask, prompted those remarks?

Young parents let their kids run up and down the aisle unsupervised, disturbing people who wanted to sleep. Throwing things in the aisle and not picking them up. I almost tripped over things three times. And the adults were not much better. Many of them stood in the aisle, blocking the screen and preventing other passengers from seeing the movie. The pilot had to tell everyone to be seated numerous times so that he might take off. The expressions on the faces of the other passengers reflected sheer disgust. And the chaos didn’t end with the plane trip, but continued at baggage pick-up…kids pushing and shoving – preventing people from getting to their luggage… mind you, all this before we even reached our hotel! As for the goings-on at the hotel itself – that merits a letter in and of itself.

Just to highlight a few points: 1) lack of respect for property. It was apparent that these children never learned the prohibitions regarding bal tashchis – being wasteful and destructive. I couldn’t help but wonder what they were learning in their schools or in their homes. I cannot imagine why the management of any hotel would rent their facilities to such a crowd. Admittedly, as I said before, this behavior was representative of only a minority, but it was so blatant that it overshadowed all else. I found it a challenge just to navigate the lobby without being knocked over by wild kids whose parents were nowhere in sight.

One morning, I found a two-year old wandering around unsupervised. These resorts are huge. They have large grounds, swimming pools and lakes, and a child can easily find his way outdoors -not to mention the cars on the grounds and the “strange” people who nowadays can be found everywhere. I shudder to think of what might have happened to this little boy if I hadn’t found him. These mothers do not have to cook or prepare for Yom Tov meals, and the fathers are there to devote their time to their children – so why don’t they?

The dining room presented yet another hazard, with waiters carrying heavy trays laden with hot food and kids running underfoot like. It was truly a miracle that there were no accidents. Then there was the tea room…children milling around the well-stocked refreshment tables, putting their unwashed hands into platters of cake, fruit and chocolate…once again unsupervised. I could go on and on, but I’m sure that by now you get the picture.

I must add that it was not only the behavior of the little ones that I found objectionable. The conduct of the teenagers also bothered me. When I see teenage yeshiva students spending hours playing cards or hanging out in the lobby until the early hours of the morning, I wonder what happened to their chinuch. Didn’t anyone ever teach them to appreciate the preciousness of time?

Some of these teens were so wrapped up in themselves that they never saw an elderly person pass by who might need a chair or help in opening a heavy door, not to mention wishing others a good Yom Tov or honoring the mitzvah of “Mipnei seivah takum” – rising for the elderly.

I watch parents today. They are afraid to tell their kids anything. Recently, five of my friends admitted to me that they are afraid to “say boo” to their children. They are afraid to lose their love. They are afraid that their kids will turn on them. And this holds true, not only for parents of the young or adolescents, but unfortunately for mothers and fathers of married children as well. In short, parents are afraid to be parents and children grow up without discipline and direction. Is it any wonder then that’s how we look?

Nor does the picture improve when families decide to stay at home. Allow me to cite just a few examples from the experiences of my friends and myself.

(To be continued)

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “I Am Saddened (Part One)”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
Peace partners for hate: Palestinian Authority Chairman Mahmoud Abbas (R) and chief negotiator Saeb Erekat.
PA Chief Negotiator Compares Netanyahu with ISIS
Latest Judaism Stories

On Sunday, Jews will be refraining from food and drink from dawn until sunset to commemorate the Fast of Gedaliah. Following Nebuchadnetzar’s destruction of the First Temple and exile of most of the Jews, the Babylonians appointed Gedaliah ben Achikaam as governor of Judea. Under Gedaliah’s leadership, Judea and the survivors began to recover. On […]

On the beach

As we enter the Days of Awe, we must recognize that it is a joy to honor and serve true royalty.

Rabbi Avi Weiss

On Rosh Hashanah we are taught that true self-analysis involves the breaking down of walls

PTI-092614-Shofar

When we hear the words “Rosh Hashana is coming” it really means Hashem Himself is coming!

Who am I? What are the most important things in my life? What do I want to be remembered for? If, as a purely hypothetical exercise, I were to imagine reading my own obituary, what would I want it to say? These are the questions Rosh Hashanah urges us to ask ourselves. As we pray […]

We recently marked the thirteenth anniversary of 9/11 – that terrible day when the symbols of man’s power and achievement crumbled before our eyes and disappeared in fire and smoke. For a very brief moment we lost our smugness. Our confidence was shaken. Many of us actually searched our ways. Some of us even learned […]

Why am I getting so agitated? And look how we’re treating each other!

While women are exempt from actually learning Torah, they are obligated in a different aspect of the mitzvah.

Question: I recently loaned money to a friend who has been able to repay only part of it. This was an interest-free loan. We exchanged a signed IOU, not a proper shtar with witnesses, since I have always trusted her integrity and only wanted a document that confirms what was loaned and what was repaid. Now that shemittah is approaching, what should I do? Should I forgive the loan? And if my friend is not able to repay it, may I deduct the unpaid money from my ma’aser requirement?

Name Withheld

We must eat, sleep, work, and care for our dependants. How much time is left over after all that?

Once we recognize that our separation from God is our fault, how do we repair it?

Chatzitzah And Its Applications
‘Greater Stringency Applies To Hallowed Things…’
(Chagiga 20b-21a)

To choose life, you must examine your actions in the period preceding the Days of Awe as an unbiased stranger, and render your decision.

Rabbi Dayan took a challah and some cooked eggs. He then called over his 15-year-old son, Aharon. “Could you please ask your friend Chaim from next door to come over and help me with the eruv tavshilin?”

This world has its purpose; it has been ideally fashioned to allow man to grow.

More Articles from Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis
Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

We recently marked the thirteenth anniversary of 9/11 – that terrible day when the symbols of man’s power and achievement crumbled before our eyes and disappeared in fire and smoke. For a very brief moment we lost our smugness. Our confidence was shaken. Many of us actually searched our ways. Some of us even learned […]

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

One of the cornerstones of our Jewish life is chesed, kindness. Chesed can only be taught by example

“There is nothing new under the sun” is as valid today as it was yesterday.

The time immediately preceding Mashiach’s arrival is likened to the birth pangs of a woman in labor.

If we regard pain and suffering as mere coincidence, we will feel no motivation to examine our lives

What does Hashem want of us? That we should protect each other and the awesome heritage He gave us.

Gratitude=Great Attitude. Appreciation is always appropriate.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/judaism/rebbetzins-viewpointrebbetzin-jungreis/i-am-saddened/2009/05/13/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: