web analytics
August 30, 2015 / 15 Elul, 5775
At a Glance
Judaism
Sponsored Post


Little Things That Can Make A Big Difference


Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

We live in a very chaotic world. If we stop to consider what is happening around us – all the things that are out of our control – it can be frustrating and frightening, so most of us try to bypass these situations by pretending we do not see them.

Undoubtedly there are many matters beyond our control – illness, economic disaster, escalating anti-Semitism masked as anti-Zionism, etc. While in most cases we are unable to control those types of challenges, there are other situations that appear to be inconsequential but nevertheless are irritating – and, with a little effort and consideration, can be avoided. I’ve recently received several letters that fall into this category.

Letter 1: Music That Hurts

Dear Rebbetzin Jungreis:

The decibel level of the music at our simchas is too loud! I came home from a wedding with a relative and his wife. The wife complained that she got a headache from the loud music. Once I went to a chassunah and found it impossible to talk to anyone. Therefore we went into the lobby to talk. Everything was fine until a man opened one of the double doors of the men’s section and the music blasted into the lobby.

Young mothers bring babies or young children to thesesimchas – some of the children can’t even talk. The child might be crying because of the loud music and he can’t tell mommy the music is hurting his ears. Other people, such as our mothers and grandmothers, don’t dance but want to socialize at these simchas. How can they talk to anyone with the music blasting in their ears?

How about the people who serve the food and clean up at these simchas? They are working and being subjected to the loud music regularly.

Teenagers, non-Jews who attend rock concerts suffer a hearing loss later in life. Must we Yidden, chas v’shalom, also suffer the same fate?

There is a way to lower the decibel level of the music. My son spoke to the person who will play at his chassunah, which will take place soon. If that person can do it, anyone can!

Sincerely yours,

A mother and grandmother

Letter 2: Marred Simchas

Dear Rebbetzin Jungreis:

Approximately two months ago, my wife and I had the zechus, the merit, of celebrating the wedding of our daughter. This was the first time we made a wedding. We were so happy and went all out to make the occasion as special as possible. We drew up our wedding list but, to our regret, had to cut many people we would have liked to invite. Our machatonim – in-laws – have a very large family. The young couple has many friends, so were we forced to rewrite our guest list several times. But with all the cutting, we ended up sending out 350 invitations, with 300 responding affirmatively. We had to stretch our budget since we never realized how even a simple wedding could be so expensive. However, we went ahead because we did not want to hurt anyone.

Well, you can imagine our shock and disappointment when, after the chuppah, a large number of guests for whom we had made reservations left. During the course of the celebration, my wife and I, along with the young couple, visited every table. To our dismay, we found most of the tables half-empty. People who had replied that they would attend went home after the chuppah. Now, no one likes to sit at an empty table and the guests who remained felt alone and isolated, and my wife and I felt we had been taken advantage of. We had a huge bill that was thrown-out money.

After much discussion, my wife and I decided we had to try to do something and decided to write to you in the hope you would bring this to the attention of your readers so that people would think twice before they check off “yes” on their response cards.

Before I conclude, I would like to call your attention to yet another irritant – people who do not respond to an invitation. You have to call them up to ask if they are planning to attend. I find such behavior unconscionable, and, believe me, we had many such people.

In conclusion, there is much grief in this world, so if, Baruch Hashem, we have a simcha, why should it be marred by lack of consideration and mentschlechkeit?

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Little Things That Can Make A Big Difference”

Comments are closed.

Current Top Story
Dr. Ben Carson (left) at the Western Wall in December 2014.
Pro-Israel Carson Breathing Down Neck of Pro-Israel Trump
Latest Judaism Stories
Torat-Hakehillah-logo-NEW

The common translation of the opening words of this week’s parsha, Ki Seitzei, is: “When you go out to war against your enemy.” Actually the text reads “al oyvecha” upon your enemy. The Torah is saying that when Israel goes out to war, they will be over and above their enemy. The reason why Bnei […]

Rabbi Avi Weiss

The love between Gd & Israel is deeper than marriage; beyond the infinite love of parent for child

Q-A-Klass-logo

Question: When a stranger approaches a congregant in shul asking for tzedakah, should the congregant verify that the person’s need is genuine? Furthermore, what constitutes tzedakah? Is a donation to a synagogue, yeshiva, or hospital considered tzedakah?

Zvi Kirschner
(Via E-Mail)

Taste-of-Lomdus-logo

Since giving the machatzis hashekel will not change his financial situation, he is obligated to do so even though it is more than a fifth of his income.

Today, few people fast during the Days of Selichot, but the custom is to rise early to recite Selichot.

Each month is associated with a particular tribe. The month of Elul is matched up with Gad. What makes Gad unique?

Sanctions and indictment of the Jew, holding him to a higher standard, is as common and misplaced as ever.

To allow for free will, there are times when Hashem will allow a person the “opportunity to be the messenger.”

“There is a mitzvah to pay the worker on that day,” answered Mr. Lerner.

Be happy. Be grateful. God knows what he is doing. It is all happening for a reason.

We get so busy living our lives, handling our day-to-day little crises that we forget to go that one step deeper and appreciate our lives.

The promise for long life only comes from 2 commandments; What’s the connection between them?

Mighty Amalek deliberately attacked enemy’s weakest members, despicable even by ancient standards

If we parents fail to honor responsibilities then society’s children will pay the price for our sins

Consider how our Heavenly Father feels when He sees His children adopting all other parents but Him

More Articles from Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis
Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

Money comes and goes but its love, commitment, warmth, and kindness that make a family a family.

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

To my dismay, I’ve seen that shidduch candidates with money become ALL desirable traits for marriage

Zaidie’s legacy of smiles and loving words was all but buried with him, now the family fights over $

Jewish survival in a dysfunctional world requires women assuming the role Hashem gave them at Sinai

In every generation is the challenge to purge the culture of our exile from our minds and our hearts

His mother called “Yoni, Yoni!” Her eyes, a moment earlier dark with pain, shone with joy and hope

Pesach bonds families and generations: “So that you may relate it to your son and your son’s son.

Amalek’s hate never dies; its descendants are eternal & omnipresent; Hashem is our only protection

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/judaism/rebbetzins-viewpointrebbetzin-jungreis/little-things-that-can-make-a-big-difference-2/2010/12/15/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: