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Losing Our Children: Who Is Responsible?

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We can work towards a solution by creating a partnership between schools and parents. When children come home from school with complaints about their teachers, it is important that nothing negative about the teacher is said in front of the children. Speaking negatively will teach the child that it is acceptable to disrespect authority, an attitude that will backfire on the parents who are also authority figures. If we really want our children to be happy, we should spend less time “buying their love” and more time modeling productive ways of dealing with frustration and conflict. When a person sends his car to the mechanic for repairs, he is likely to call every hour to find out when it is ready, as he misses the use of his car. Parents send their most precious commodity, their children, to school, yet they only speak to the “mechanics,” the teachers, a few times a year. As a result, the needs of children are often not dealt with until the child is frustrated, failing or in crisis. The onus is on both schools and parents to reach out and create an environment in which parents can be actively involved in their children’s education. If social, emotional, or educational issues are addressed before they spiral out of control, we are more likely to rectify the situation while it is still rectifiable.

Each child is an unpolished diamond, and we must give our children the tools they need to shine. May we all be given Heavenly assistance in guiding each child to find success through his or her uniqueness.

About the Author: Rabbi Gil Frieman is the pulpit Rabbi of Jewish Center Nachlat Zion, the home of Ohr Naava. He is certified as a shochet, sofer, and has given lectures in the United States, Canada, and throughout Eretz Yisroel. Rabbi Frieman is currently the American Director of seminaries Darchei Binah, Afikei Torah, and Chochmas Lev in Eretz Yisroel, and teaches in Nefesh High School, Camp Tubby during the summers, and lectures weekly at Ohr Naava. In addition, Rabbi Frieman teaches all tracks in Ateres Naava Seminary. He is a highly anticipated speaker on TorahAnytime.com where he speaks live most Wednesday nights at 9:00pm EST.


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