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July 5, 2015 / 18 Tammuz, 5775
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Happy Birthday

President Shimon, on his birthday, attempting to suck in a cake from a distance of 12 inches.

President Shimon, on his birthday, attempting to suck in a cake from a distance of 12 inches.
Photo Credit: Mark Neyman/GPO/FLASH90

I was born today, 59 years ago, in the Assuta hospital in Tel Aviv. They moved the hospital since, but not on my account.

Turning 59 is probably the least meaningful date thing in anyone’s life. But wait one year and watch me uncorking the champagne bottles.

I asked my family specifically not to buy me anything for my birthday this year, and so far they’ve been able to resist the temptation.

I searched for famous people who were born on the same day I did. It was Yom Kippur, by the way, a fact I would make a big deal out of 19 years later, when the 1973 war broke out. The Jewish and Civil years run in 19-year cycles, so at 19, 38, 57, 76, 95, 114, and 133 you get to celebrate both your Jewish and regular birthday on the same day. And my 19th year’s birthday gift was the Yom Kippur war.

Gary Evans was also born on October 7, 1954. He died on August 14, 1998. He lived in NY State and was a burglar and a serial killer.

So, like I’ve been telling my wife for years – she could do worse.

Bill Foster, AKA George William Foster III, was a Congressman from Illinois between 2008 and 2011, was born on October 7, 1955. I swear, he has a son, born in 1984, and his name is… absolutely, it’s George William Foster IV. GWF 3’s first wife divorced him in the 1990s. Was it the naming thing?

Poet Amiri Baraka, who hates me for being both Whitey and Jewey, was born on October 7, 1934. maybe if he found out we share a birthday he would hate me thrice. Oh, and Nation of Islam prophet Elijah Muhammad was born October 7, 1897. He left us on February 25, 1975. He probably also hated me for the same three reasons. And Archbishop of Cape Town Desmond Tutu, who probably also hates me for being Israeli, was born October 7, 1931.

On the other hand, physicist Niels Bohr, Father of Quantum Theory, was born October 7, 1885. He left us Nov. 18, 1962, at least in this timeline.

I dreamed I saw Joe Hill last night. The famous Swedish-American labor activist, songwriter, and member of the Industrial Workers of the World was born October 7, 1879. He was convicted of murder (over a love triangle) and executed on November 19, 1915.

Here’s another guy we’re all proud of today: SS leader Heinrich Himmler was born October 7, 1900, committed suicide May 23, 1945. Well, we were bound to have at least one Nazi – there were so many of them.

My dad, who was freed from Nazi slavery in May of 1945, said my birth was the happiest moment in his life bar none. I suspect it had something to do with the month of May, 1945, and the six years the preceded it.

Cellist Yo-Yo Ma was born October 7, 1955.

Singer/Songwriter John Cougar Mellencamp was born October 7, 1951.

OK, here’s a big one: Vladimir Putin entered the world on October 7, 1952. On the same day he tamed a wild horse, drank several nipple bottles of vodka and swam across the River Volga barechested.

Like I said, we’re not doing anything this birthday, saving up for next year, when the theme will be: “So he didn’t get Karet.”

But it’s a long year until then…

About the Author: Yori Yanover has been a working journalist since age 17, before he enlisted and worked for Ba'Machane Nachal. Since then he has worked for Israel Shelanu, the US supplement of Yedioth, JCN18.com, USAJewish.com, Lubavitch News Service, Arutz 7 (as DJ on the high seas), and the Grand Street News. He has published Dancing and Crying, a colorful and intimate portrait of the last two years in the life of the late Lubavitch Rebbe, (in Hebrew), and two fun books in English: The Cabalist's Daughter: A Novel of Practical Messianic Redemption, and How Would God REALLY Vote.


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5 Responses to “Happy Birthday”

  1. Virginia Laidler Bialek says:

    Happy birthday !!

  2. Linda Dudley says:

    I love the theme and sharing who’s who!! blessings to you and your fam

  3. Gullo Pascal says:

    Happy birthday!

Comments are closed.

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