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Mentoring

27 Sivan 5770 – June 9, 2010
When the parent-teen relationship is strained or just needs improvement parents can utilize outside help to bring about a change. When necessary, one of the most effective ways of wielding indirect control is by having the teenager meet with a mentor. As a third person, uninvolved in family conflicts, a mentor is able to interact with a teenager and provide an informal means of solving problems at school, help the teen do homework or simply be a friend.

Moti’s Street Clothes

28 Iyyar 5770 – May 12, 2010
I once received a call from a forty-seven year old distraught mother whose seventeen-year-old son Moti had changed his style of dress, wearing jeans and refusing to wear a hat. She explained that he had gone through a difficult time in school and was now hanging around the house instead of studying in yeshiva. He was also mixed up with the wrong crowd and was associating with at-risk teenagers late at night on the street. She was very concerned as she had an older son who had gone "off the path" and was worried that Moti was going in the same direction. She believed that Moti could be helped if he would be willing to talk with someone.

Control Issue

15 Iyyar 5770 – April 28, 2010
In our rapidly changing world, the idea of control has begun to change quicker than anyone can imagine. A metamorphosis of unparalleled proportion is taking place and many parents feel that they are unequipped to deal with the challenges that it will demand.

Toby’s Secret Dating

19 Nisan 5770 – April 2, 2010
Ruth had just recently discovered (from another parent) that Toby had been secretly dating a boy for over a year. When she confronted Toby about her boyfriend, Toby had adamantly refused to admit that she was secretly seeing anyone. Ruth was extremely distraught to realize that her daughter would do something against her wishes and asked if I could help.

Debbie’s Body Piercing

5 Nisan 5770 – March 19, 2010
Referring back to our earlier case of Debbie’s body piercing, let’s see how using knowledge of Debbie’s inner world and the power of spending quality time together can help her parents connect to her.

Controlling Your Teenager (Continued From 2/19/10 Issue)

20 Adar 5770 – March 5, 2010
The fifth pillar of the inner world is what the eminent psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Victor Frankl called the “Will to Meaning.” This desire for meaning implies wanting to know the whys of life and not just the hows.

Controlling Your Teenager

6 Adar 5770 – February 19, 2010
As children move from infancy into middle and later childhood, they have a growing need for control over their environment. To meet this need, teenagers must be given reasonable power to make choices about what they eat, whom they play with, and what extracurricular activities they participate in.

Self Esteem, Individuality and Love for Teenagers

22 Shevat 5770 – February 5, 2010
We often use the expressions "good self-esteem” or "poor self-esteem” to describe people’s evaluation of their own worth. When people have good self-esteem, they tend to view life from a positive perspective, seeing their potential value. Poor or low self-esteem causes people to feel that everything they do in life is a losing battle and that they always get the short end of the stick.

The Roadmap To Your Teenager’s Inner Worlds

6 Shevat 5770 – January 20, 2010
Relating to their teenager can be easier than most parents think, especially when they learn about the key areas that can sustain the relationship: connection, control, and communication.

More Common Teenage Issues

23 Tevet 5770 – January 8, 2010
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Mark, sixteen years old, has trouble sitting still in class. His mind wanders; he's anxious and is failing many of his...

Investing In Your Relationship

9 Tevet 5770 – December 25, 2009
As many parents discover, building a good relationship with a teenager is not easy. Often teenagers are reluctant to be close to their parents, and at times they look to distance themselves as much as possible. If so, how can parents see beyond the daily power struggles of homework, keeping curfew, staying out of trouble, and succeeding in school?

Relationship Centered Parenting

26 Kislev 5770 – December 12, 2009
Building a relationship with your children is often one of the most overlooked aspects of parenting teenagers; yet clearly, as the evidence suggests, the relationship is key to managing a teenager’s at-risk behavior and restoring confidence in the family unit.

The Magic Pill

11 Kislev 5770 – November 27, 2009
Life is full of stories about teenagers having difficulty making it through adolescence. However, parenting teens – even teens who are at risk – doesn’t have to be such a daunting task when parents are willing to focus more on the relationship and less on getting immediate results. Building the relationship is the key to reaching teens who are at risk.

Shalom Task Force: Answering The Call Of Domestic Abuse

21 Tishri 5770 – October 9, 2009
Due to the overwhelming amount of e-mail I have received about domestic abuse, this week's column focuses on the services of Shalom Task Force. (Names...

Part 28 – Healthy Marriages Equal Longer Life Expectancy

9 Elul 5769 – August 28, 2009
Can improving your marriage help you live longer? A fascinating study led by researchers at Hebrew University revealed that Bnei Brak, an Israeli city that has one of the highest proportions of ultra-Orthodox Jews, also had the longest life expectancy in Israel. This is what the report found:

The P’TACH Miracle

2 Elul 5769 – August 21, 2009
One of the leading factors influencing family life is the intellectual and emotional development of the children. In most families, the children grow up healthy, happy and able to fulfill their academic or Torah-based goals. But what happens when a child is perpetually falling behind and is then diagnosed with a learning disability?

Part 27 – Refocusing Your Perspective On Your In-laws

25 Av 5769 – August 14, 2009
The number one factor in resolving problems of acceptance by in-laws is your spouse’s support. As with all close relationships, it’s an art to support your spouse without jumping into the fight or feeding his or her discontent.

Part 26 – Relating To Your In-laws

18 Av 5769 – August 7, 2009
You may think you said “I do” to just one person on your wedding day, but the reality of married life is that you actually vowed to honor several people. Marriage comes with new challenges; some of which you had no idea were waiting for you.

Part 25 – Learning To Be Content

11 Av 5769 – July 31, 2009
One of the most important ways a couple can manage money together is to learn the art of contentment. We have already discussed how making a budget can be a very simple way to start saving money.

Part 24 – Making a Monthly Budget

1 Av 5769 – July 22, 2009
There's no getting around it: in marriage, a budget is a requirement for good money management. A budget is simply (1) a tool to increase your consciousness of how and where you spend your money, and (2) a guideline to help you spend your money on the things that are most important to you. Following a budget can create money for savings, where you thought there was none.

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Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/parenting-our-children/mentoring/2010/06/09/

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