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Title: Dating Smart: Navigating the Path to Marriage
Authors: Sherry Zimmerman and Rosie Einhorn
Publisher: Menucha Publishers

The dating world is a daunting place. Working with shadchanim, deciding about potential dating partners, and navigating through the dating process can leave even the most put-together person feeling frustrated and overwhelmed. Through their work with singles, psychotherapists Sherry Zimmerman and Rosie Einhorn (authors of The Jewish Press column “A Dating Primer” and the popular books Talking Tachlis and In the Beginning) have observed – and helped – people struggling with these issues time and again.

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Once again, the two have merged their expertise in a new venture to help singles figure it out and, well, date smart. Whether you are an experienced dater, or new to “the parsha,” it’s invaluable to have someone guiding you along the way. While nothing can replace a live dating mentor, reading Dating Smart: Navigating the Path to Marriage is the next best thing. It’s like having Rosie or Sherry’s expert advice personally guiding you through your courtship.

The book is masterfully arranged chapter by chapter, according to the natural progression of the dating process, taking daters through all of the steps along the route and the different feelings they may encounter feeling as they navigate the course that leads them to realize they’ve met their bashert.

Dating Smart covers everything, starting with the basics of figuring out what to look for in the first place and developing reasonable expectations about dating and marriage. It discusses relationship-building, identifying obstacles to developing an emotional connection, overcoming fears, addressing significant issues that arise, and knowing when it’s time to make the leap to getting engaged, as well as most of the big and little things that happen in between.

The authors thoughtfully and sensitively touch on all the issues that daters may be struggling with. Anyone, from the experienced dater to the novice, can find advice that is relevant and helpful.

Using real-life anecdotal experiences as examples, the chapters talk the reader through various dating scenarios and address questions that readers may have but are afraid to ask. This includes many previously taboo subjects including certain dating anxieties. Also helpful is the list of tips with bullet points at the end of each chapter, which crystallizes the relevant points that will help the reader “date smart.”

Other topics addressed include the benefits of a dating break and how to do it successfully, using networking to your advantage, and how to evaluate red flags. Dating Smart contains several exercises that readers can use to develop more clarity and self-awareness, so that they can ultimately choose the person who’s truly right for them. There are also guidelines to help readers who need to seek out more support and guidance than what a regular dating coach can offer.

All in all, Dating Smart is a well-rounded, thoughtful guide to help any dater, whether jaded or motivated, successfully navigate his or her single and dating life and expeditiously move on to the next, and even better, life stage.

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Beryl Tritel, M.S.W., has a private psychotherapy practice specializing in women's life issues in Jerusalem and Ramat Bet Shemesh. She can be reached at [email protected].