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Another distasteful question mourners can do without: How old was she/he? The inevitable look of relief on the questioner’s face that says, “oh, s/he lived long enough!” when the age of an elderly parent is revealed does nothing to mitigate the gut-wrenching pain of the child sitting shiva for that parent.

Thank you for alerting us to the importance of opting for silence over foolish prattle. May Hashem comfort you and your family and may you know of no more sorrow.

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