web analytics
July 6, 2015 / 19 Tammuz, 5775
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post


Chronicles Of Crises In Our Communities

By:

Chronicles-logo

Cousins On The Same Page

 

Dear Rachel,

We are two first cousins, firstborn boys and close buddies. We are both almost 16 and each of us has younger brothers and sisters. The reason we are writing this letter to you is because we feel that we are not treated fairly. In short, our parents expect too much of us just because we are the oldest. It’s always “You are the bechor and need to set an example…” or “As the oldest, you should know better!”

We also get stuck having to watch over our younger brothers who then become leeches and hang on us when we don’t want them around.

Our dads expect us to go with them everywhere. Like our younger brothers many times get to stay home on Shabbos while we must always go to shul.

When our parents need to go someplace, they rely on us to babysit. When something gets broken in the house, somehow it ends up being our fault. “Why didn’t you stop your brother (or sister)?” or “Why did you make them wild?”

Our parents read The Jewish Press and we sometimes hear them discussing your column, so we know they will read this if you print it. Maybe it will make them try to understand us better. We would love for them to realize that even though we’re kids we still need a life. They often say they “need some privacy.” It would be great if they could recognize that we can also do with some privacy.

There is also a lot of pressure on us to do well in school and to get top grades. Sometimes we talk about how great it would be if we were only children. Our homes would be quieter, we wouldn’t get blamed for everything, and we’d get to have lots of time for ourselves.

We’ve asked our parents to send us to a yeshiva out of town, but they seem to have made up their minds to keep us at home, as if they don’t trust us to be away. At least we get to go to camp in the summer, but those weeks go by very quickly.

 Just sign us Joe and Moe

 

Dear Joe and Moe,

How lucky you are to have one another as close friends! Believe it or not, your younger siblings often wish they could trade places with you. They look up to you and consider your position as the eldest to be an enviable one.

Baruch Hashem your parents were blessed with children. Many childless couples would like nothing better than to become parents, and many parents of one child would love to be able to give their only children a brother or sister or more, but Hashem may have other plans for them.

It’s not easy raising children, and it’s not easy being children. While you may be having a hard time understanding your parents, you can be sure they often have difficulty figuring you out as well. The teen years are probably the hardest on everybody, since you are caught between being a child and being a grownup. Naturally you would like nothing better than to have your independence and to do your own thing, but at the same time you are not quite ready to go it alone.

Your parents have the awesome responsibility of guiding you in the right direction and protecting you from hurt and harm. If they are reluctant to send you away, you can bet they have good reason for it. Every parent hopes to make the right decisions and choices for their children whom they love more than life itself. As you get older, you will gain a better understanding and appreciation for all of this.

About the Author: We encourage women and men of all ages to send in their personal stories via email to rachel@jewishpress.com or by mail to Rachel/Chronicles, c/o The Jewish Press, 4915 16th Ave., Brooklyn, N.Y. 11204. If you wish to make a contribution and help agunot, your tax-deductible donation should be sent to The Jewish Press Foundation. Please make sure to specify that it is to help agunot, as the foundation supports many worthwhile causes.


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Chronicles Of Crises In Our Communities”

Comments are closed.

Current Top Story
Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov.
Russia Steps Up in U.S.-led Nuclear Talks with Iran
Latest Sections Stories
Grieff-070315

In the face of evil, we can do acts of kindness. We can do good deeds.

Teens-Twenties-logo

I realized that I am an integral part of that man who wished to win – I am also a part of a nation; I felt like I was standing there and shouting, “I won.”

Teens-Twenties-logo

As I powerfully belted out the song, Ani Maamin B’emunah Sheleima – which means “I believe in God with full faith” – a thought suddenly crossed my mind.

Ganz-View-From-Window-logo

I do not suggest abandoning civilization for a pristine desert island or a hilltop in Judea or Samaria.

After diamonds were discovered in South Africa in the mid-1800s, Antwerp regained its prominence as the diamond capital of the world.

Search the Internet for innovative barbeque items and you might just be surprised at what you come across.

Orlando was once a place where people came only to visit and vacation. Now it is home to a burgeoning Torah community, a place Jewish families can be proud to call home.

You’re not seeking perfection. You’re seeking a life that an average person can manage and feel good about. Don’t feel pressure to change everything at once.

The smuggler’s life has been changed forever. He is faced with a major criminal charge. He will probably be sent to prison.

In Culture Shock, readers will also come to identify with a culture from the other end of Orthodox Jewry’s spectrum.

Children with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) or Executive Function Disorder (EFD) have trouble keeping themselves organized and on-task.

Our Sages have told us exactly how we should act – and how our children should act – in Pirkei Avos, Ethics of the Fathers.

A second supposed difficulty actually becomes a reason to corroborate that Amestris is Esther.

I work with the Bible in one hand and the tools of excavation in the other.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/chronicles-of-crises/chronicles-of-crises-in-our-communities-323/2014/05/09/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: