web analytics
January 29, 2015 / 9 Shevat, 5775
 
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post


Degrees Of Rejection

Respler-091412-Girl

A Concerned Father

Dear Concerned Father:

I agree with your ideas vis-à-vis childrearing, believing that parents should be loving and strict but must not hit their children. A chashuvah rav was once asked about his opinion on hitting in today’s world. He answered that in previous generations tzaddikim hit their children gently when they were not angry. Today, on the other hand, most parents hit their children to rid themselves of their own anger and frustration. Based on this the rav paskened that hitting in our day is prohibited al pi halacha, since parents are not allowed to hit their children while angry – but only when they are calm (for the purpose of chinuch). Since today’s parents are not on that madregah, hitting is not permitted.

If your wife is hitting the children to rid herself of her own frustration, she is violating halacha. Additionally, it is not a healthy parenting approach. Please help your wife deal with her anger by being more understanding and loving toward her.

Here are some questions that you should ponder: Does your wife need more help in the house? Getting help for her with the cleaning may be a good investment, as it will help her become more relaxed. Whatever you can do to reduce your wife’s stress can be helpful, as most people strike others when they are frustrated or angry. Those feelings often result from stress.

Perhaps your wife needs some outside help with her parenting. People generally do not just change overnight. Furthermore, your wife has to want to change the way she conducts her parenting, and must try to change in order for change to occur. There are some wonderful parenting classes and books that focus on consistent and positive parenting methods.

Finally, if you and/or your wife feel that she needs extra guidance, it may be worth it for her to see a professional for a few sessions. This may help her better manage the children, along with improving her own reactions to their behavior. Hatzlachah!

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Degrees Of Rejection”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
ISIS murderers threatening Obama
ISIS: We Will Behead Obama, Make US Part of the Caliphate [video]
Latest Sections Stories
book-Perfection

In the introduction to the first volume, R. Katz discusses the Torah ideal, arguing that the Torah’s laws are intended to craft the perfect man and are not to be regarded as ends unto themselves.

South-Florida-logo

A highlight of the evening was the video produced by the Kleinman Family Holocaust Education Center on the legendary Agudah askan Reb Elimelech (Mike) Tress, a true Jewish hero.

South-Florida-logo

Until recently his films were largely forgotten, but with their release last year on DVD by Re:Voir Video in Paris they are once again available.

Collecting-History-logo

Though the CCAR supported the Jewish right to emigrate to Eretz Yisrael, it strenuously objected to defining Palestine as the Jewish homeland.

“Well, you are also part of this class! If someone drills a hole in the boat, the boat will ultimately sink, and even the innocent ones will perish as well. The whole class must be punished!”

Nouril concluded he had no choice: He had to become more observant.

I find his mother to be a difficult person and my nature is to stay away from people like that.

Here are some recipes to make your Chag La’Illanot a festive one.

Does standing under the chuppah signal the end of our dream of romance and beautiful sunsets?

We aren’t at a platform; we are underground, just sitting there.

Dr. Lowy believed passionately in higher education for both men and women and would stop at nothing to assist young students in achieving their educational goals.

It’s almost pointless to try to summarize all of the fascinating information that Holzer’s research unearthed.

The special charm of these letters is their immediacy and authenticity of emotion and description.

More Articles from Dr. Yael Respler
Respler-012315

I find his mother to be a difficult person and my nature is to stay away from people like that.

Respler-011615

Often both girls and boys compare their date to their parents.

The Moroccan wife’s chief pride is showing that she ought to win the prize for the most attentive and solicitous spouse and mother.

Both parties need to become more tolerant of one another.

I think a major problem within the “single” community is the pressure to get married ASAP.

How many potential shidduchim are not coming about because we, the mothers, are not allowing them to go through?

I so desperately want to have a loving relationship with my stepsons.

Isn’t there anyone making a simcha who understands that loud music can cause hearing loss?

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/marriage-relationships/degrees-of-rejection/2012/09/13/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: