web analytics
September 17, 2014 / 22 Elul, 5774
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post
Apartment 758x530 Africa-Israel at the Israel Real Estate Exhibition in New York

Africa Israel Residences, part of the Africa Israel Investments Group led by international businessman Lev Leviev, will present 7 leading projects on the The Israel Real Estate Exhibition in New York on Sep 14-15, 2014.



Divorce and Its Real Life Challenges: A Community Call to Action


Marriage-Relationship-logo

However, when families invite a divorcee for Shabbat, they should bear in mind that the invitation is not just about displaying one’s fancy dinnerware or culinary excellence. A Shabbat meal is more than just filling up a guest’s plate with heaps of kugel and cholent (although that is still very much appreciated). In reality, the meal symbolizes a chance for the divorcee to recharge his or her emotional batteries. It should provide feelings of genuine hospitality as well as emotional and spiritual rejuvenation.

The Torah also proves the point that hosting guests involves more than providing a repast. Shabbat is about creating an atmosphere of family, unity, and love. The Torah alludes to this particular message through a line in the Haggadah: “Ha lach mianya.” Have you ever pondered over that phrase? Why is it that we take a moment from our action-packed Seder to invite an anonymous underprivileged person who is unlikely to hear our invitation to begin with? Additionally, we have already performed the mitzvah of ma’ot chittim prior to the Seder, so why does the Haggadah still feel the need to emphasize our responsibility towards the impoverished?

It is because in spite of our mitzvah of ma’ot chittim, we still need to give to those who are less fortunate. An anonymous donation of matzah, wine, meat, and chicken can alleviate a needy person’s financial predicaments; but does it necessarily provide holiday festivity and social warmth? A meal on Shabbat should develop kinship, dignity, and inner tranquility. Have we given those blessings to the needy? On the night that we are considered to be kings and queens, we must acknowledge that every Jewish member has the right to feel part of the royal clan. The responsibility to welcome an impoverished person to one’s home is not just restricted to those who are financially impoverished. It extends to those who can be emotionally impoverished as well (such as singles and divorcees). Therefore, if a family enables a single guest to feel accepted, joyous, and temporarily diverted from his or her distress, then they have truly accomplished a benevolent feat.

A further gesture that the Jewish Orthodox community can offer to divorced individuals (who are single parents) is parenting support and guidance. A single parent can benefit greatly from another parent’s advice on child rearing. A family can also offer to babysit a divorcee’s child so that he or she can run errands, meet a friend, or go out on a date. One must keep in mind that a divorced parent does not have that – oft taken for granted – shoulder to lean on. He or she no longer has a spouse to confer over significant issues relating to children. Being a loyal backbone for a divorcee (whether it is providing parenting suggestions or offering to babysit) truly ameliorates the arduous journey of marital separation and single parenthood.

In summation, our community should resist closing its eyes to divorced individuals and their challenges. Parenting difficulties, heartache, and the community’s initial disapproval are several tribulations that divorced people must endure. As a community, we can minimize these challenges by offering divorcees gestures of kindness and warmth. Yes, providing financial assistance to divorced individuals is tremendously helpful and sincerely appreciated, yet the most precious gift is offering sincere empathy and acceptance.

These gifts will make an invaluable difference in the lives of divorcees and their children.

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Divorce and Its Real Life Challenges: A Community Call to Action”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
PLO / PA / Fatah leader Mahmoud Abbas.
PA Unity Government Not Unified
Latest Sections Stories
Ganz-091214-Fifty

Today, fifty years and six million (!) people later, Israel is truly a different world.

Goldberg-091214

There will always be items that don’t freeze well – salads and some rice- or potato-based dishes – so you need to leave time to prepare or cook them closer to Yom Tov and ensure there is enough room in the refrigerator to store them.

Women's under-trousers, Uzbekistan, early 20th century

In Uzbekistan, in the early twentieth century, it was the women who wore the pants.

This is an important one in raising a mentsch (and maybe even in marrying off a mentsch! listening skills are on the top of the list when I do shidduch coaching).

While multitasking is not ideal, it is often necessary and unavoidable.

Maybe now that your kids are back in school, you should start cleaning for Pesach.

The interpreter was expected to be a talmid chacham himself and be able to also offer explanations and clarifications to the students.

“When Frank does something he does it well and you don’t have to worry about dotting the i’s or crossing the t’s.”

“On Sunday I was at the Kotel with the battalion and we said a prayer of thanks. In Gaza there were so many moments of death that I had to thank God that I’m alive. Only then did I realize how frightening it had been there.”

Neglect, indifference or criticism can break a person’s neshama.

It’s fair to say that we all know or have someone in our family who is divorced.

The assumption of a shared kinship is based on being part of the human race. Life is so much easier to figure out when everyone thinks the same way.

Various other learning opportunities will be offered to the community throughout the year.

More Articles from Cantor Benny Rogosnitzky
Marriage-Relationship-logo

A mother and father living in accord and harmony is one of the best presents that can be granted to a child. Yet what happens when G-d’s natural design of child rearing becomes stripped away from a family? What happens when the notion of enjoying quality time with both parents together becomes non-existent? I am of course referring to the ramifications of divorce. Divorce eradicates the stability of a traditional family unit and invites the inherent difficulties of single parenting.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/marriage-relationships/divorce-and-its-real-life-challenges-a-community-call-to-action/2012/10/18/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: