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It is possible that your sister has a deeper problem that others don’t see. If this is the case, your mother should consider seeking the help of a professional to help her deal with your sister. Remember that there are always two sides to a story, and that unbeknownst to your mother or you, other things may be going on in your sister’s life, e.g., private challenges.

In sum, try to be dan lekaf zechus by speaking with your mother privately – when both of you are relaxed and in a good mood. If you speak about this when one or both are angry and/or frustrated, a fight will likely ensue. That, of course, will be counterproductive to what you are attempting to accomplish. Hatzlachah!

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Dr. Yael Respler is a psychotherapist in private practice who provides marital, dating and family counseling. Dr. Respler also deals with problems relating to marital intimacy. Letters may be emailed to deardryael@aol.com. To schedule an appointment, please call 917-751-4887. Dr. Orit Respler-Herman, a child psychologist, co-authors this column and is now in private practice providing complete pychological evaluations as well as child and adolescent therapy. She can be reached at 917-679-1612. Previous columns can be viewed at www.jewishpress.com and archives of Dr. Respler’s radio shows can be found at www.dryaelrespler.com.
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