Marriage and Relationships

Marriage, by contrast, is an institution of close, complementary cooperation. Its success or failure depends upon the the couples, ability to work together as a TEAM. However, in order to accomplish this, we first have to understand that in marriage we carry our own emotional baggage along with us — some good and some, not so good. The not-so-good seems to stand out a lot more.

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Being someone that others feel they can rely on when they are in a bind is highly commendable. It is frustrating, however, to even the most noble giver...

No spouse can make you happy. You have to find happiness within yourself and then you can build a loving relationship.

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A prominent shadchan recently articulated a dilemma she’s facing.

Isn't therapy about being yourself; aren't there different ways for people to communicate with each other?

Pesach should be a wonderful time for families to share, a time of bonding and memory-creating.

To have him suddenly make an appearance in your life again must have been jarring, forcing you to relive the emotions you thought you had put to rest.

Almost every profession has what we call the tools of the trade, and with marriage it isn't any different. If you're single, engaged or a newlywed, you need to have the tools it takes to build a successful marriage. Yet for many of us even when the chosen and kallah classes are over, they still find it difficult to use the tools that they have just learned.

My question is do all our needs have to be fulfilled by our spouse? Maybe some of your needs can be met by siblings, good friends, or close cousins.

It pleased Leah’s father that the Rosh HaYeshiva had accorded him such respect. He was beside himself with pleasure.

But people who are very embarrassed about their issues will sometimes be more open over the phone.

Dear Dr. Yael: We have taken our daughter-in-law into our home with warmth and love. Unfortunately, her parents are divorced and she grew up in a dysfunctional family with neither of her parents giving to her financially or emotionally.

In my last article, I discussed the topic of "teens at risk." We have always had "teens at risk" within our yeshiva system, but they were segregated and referred to as the "bum class." This class was separated from the mainstream students, and given its own separate rebbe to provide support services. The success of this system was due to the fact that yeshivas followed the Torah con­cept that "majority rules".

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Building a relationship is a skill. If it’s something you need to work on, you can easily improve.

Dear Dr. Respler: When I read your May 25 column, Making Peace With Your Mother-In-Law, I started to cry, as I knew that the letter signer (Heartbroken Daughter-in-Law) was my daughter-in-law. We always discuss your column, and I guess it was her way of delivering a message to me.

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When you spend special, alone time with your daughter and give her undivided attention, you can build her self-esteem by giving her specific praise and just by making her feel valuable because of the time and positive attention you are giving her.

I work with many people who tell me painful things that people say to them. Often, these people are simply not thinking before they speak (most people don't mean to hurt others).

I find his mother to be a difficult person and my nature is to stay away from people like that.

Dear Mordechai, With Pesach almost here, my husband and I have been fighting more than ever. We’re having big sedarim and are fighting over everything, from which Haggadas to use to what to expect from our differently-aged children. This frustration has caused me to finally write to you what I’ve wanted to write for months. I don’t want to be told what to do because I’m the woman or mother...

As the Mom of a large blended family I am regularly asked, "How do you guys do it?" How do you keep this family going with all of the ups and downs, all of the challenges that go along with being parents of eight children including several who have different combinations of parents, aunts, uncles and grandparents? Well, to tell you the truth it isn't easy and there are days that I ask myself the same question.

If the daughter-in-law learns to change her reaction and validates the criticism in a positive way, the mother-in-law will likely not know how to respond.

Your husband does not seem to recognize that the children are likely struggling in the same way that he did.

Dear Gary, I'm very upset with the younger generation today and the way they treat their marriages. I've been married for 56 years and admit that it hasn't always been easy. If I thought about getting divorced each time my husband upset or annoyed me, we wouldn't have gotten past the week of sheva brachos. It seems to me that today’s newlyweds don't want to make any sacrifices and think only of themselves. My grandson, the father of two beautiful young children, is getting divorced. He says its because he didn't make his wife happy enough and spent too much time working at his new job. This is outrageous. Do you think this younger generation is too selfish?

For instance, if a woman had a very warm and loving father and then marries a warm and loving husband, she may continue to have a positive imago and enjoy an excellent relationship with her husband.

Are you looking for emotional first aid for your marriage? If you are, you’re not alone. Today, engaged couples, newlyweds and couples who have been married for years are feeling insecure about their relationships and looking for advice on how to make their marriages work better or simply to heal their relationship wounds.

In my last article I had mentioned that often one of the symptoms of autophobia, a fear of abandonment, is that as adults people suffering with this condition may become extremely sensitive to rejection.