web analytics
August 29, 2014 / 3 Elul, 5774
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post
Jerusalem Mayor Nir Barkat (L) visits the JewishPress.com booth at The Event. And the Winners of the JewishPress.com Raffle Are…

Congratulations to all the winners of the JewishPress.com raffle at The Event



Technology: Important But Not Indispensable

Respler-122112

Dear Dr. Yael:

I am part of the “over 50” crowd and am having a really hard time with computers, cell phones and the rest of the modern-day technology. I work as a well-paid secretary, but am stuck in the same position with little room for advancement due to my poor computer skills. All the while I see all of my younger colleagues, with less experience, getting raises because they are more technologically advanced. Despite taking courses to improve in this area, I am finding it hard to succeed.

Even my 10-year-old grandchild seems able to master these technological challenges! My children have cell phones and text when the need arises, but texting is very difficult for me. If I press the wrong button while writing a text, I have to start all over again. Some of my friends share my frustration, while others seem to be coping beautifully. I know that work is beginning to suffer, as there are always new programs to learn.

Can you offer any suggestions about how to cope with this issue? Baruch Hashem, I have a great marriage and my husband – who shares my difficulty with technology – is a professional and a real talmid chacham. I am also blessed to have wonderful relationships with my married children, their spouses and my grandchildren.

Please help me overcome my technological challenges.

Frustrated

Dear Frustrated:

I truly empathize with your problem, as I too am part of the “over 50” crowd and my husband and I have great difficulty with modern technology. I don’t know if misery loves company, but my young clients love to tease me about my technological shortcomings. One of my young clients, a modern technology whiz, said to me the other day, “Dr. Respler, you are a great therapist but unfortunately you are technologically impaired.” I laughed, but knew he was right.

By the way, there is no diagnosis for those of us in the “over 50” group that are technologically impaired. The DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) IV does not consider this malady a diagnosis. (lol as they say!)

On the bright side, your great marriage and wonderful relationship with your children, in-law children and grandchildren are accomplishments you should be celebrating and are worth much more than being well-versed in how to use a specific computer program.

Please remember that we were not brought up with computers. When I went to college there were only a few computer courses offered and no one had a computer at home. They were just too expensive. Since I majored in psychology, I did not even take a computer course. While I sometimes regret this, since it would have helped me in many ways, I needed to focus on required material – like those relating to science and therapy.

Reviewing my education, I have to say that in high school I was on the “academic track,” and never took bookkeeping. But I was able to convince the high school administrators to let me take typing. Trust me – bookkeeping would have been much more practical for me than algebra, trigonometry or all the math and science courses that I took to prepare for the regents exams. Even though I did well on those tests, thanks to my friends’ tutoring, I don’t know to this day what the useful value is of these subject matters. To me cooking, bookkeeping, typing and sewing would have been more helpful. Unlike Satmar yeshivas, the yeshiva high school I attended did not offer cooking and sewing. The Satmar curriculum on this issue was on the right track. After all, doesn’t cooking and sewing help any young woman in the real world – even a career-oriented woman?

Another one of my tech-savvy clients said, “Dr. Respler, don’t call yourself technologically impaired; I don’t want you to see yourself as impaired. Say that you are technologically challenged.” I guess that sounds better than impaired.

Back to your situation: I do not mean to not give you the proper empathy, but please remember that you seem to be very successful in the important areas of life – namely in your family and other relationships.

There is a downside to all the technological advances society has made: people no longer need to talk to each other. Today one can e-mail and text, having virtually no human contact with others. Here’s an example, albeit an uncommon one: Some couples that I treat fight through texting. And they will sometimes sit near each other at dinner and, instead of talking, they text their friends. This does not make for great marital communication.

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Technology: Important But Not Indispensable”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
ISIS in Quneitra
Updates from Kuneitra, Syria [video]
Latest Sections Stories
LBJ-082914

What better proof do we need than the recent war with Hamas in Gaza, dubbed “Operation Protective Edge,” that transformed the pain and suffering of three families into a sense of unparalleled unity and outpouring of love of the entire nation of Israel?

Katzman-082914

So many families are mourning, and all along we mourned with them.

Astaire-082914

In addition to his great erudition, Rabi Akiva was known for his optimism.

Kupfer-082914-Chuppah

She told me that she was busy and that he could sit in his wet clothes for the rest of the day. It would teach him to be more careful.

What can we do to help him stop feeling so sad all the time?

Children with dyslexia or dysgraphia frequently have problems in social relationships.

Israel’s neighbors engaged in hostilities from the onset. The War of Independence was a hard-won battle. Aggression and enmity has followed for 66 years.

The contest will include student-created sculpture, computer graphic design, collage, videography, PowerPoint and painting.

David, an 8-year-old boy on the autism spectrum, recently attended a Friendship Circle event. As he entered he told his Dad, “I love coming to the FC programs ‘cause everyone loves each other.”

Goldsmith himself went on his own “voyage of discovery” to the places where his grandfather and uncle landed and were sent.

Frank proclaimed himself Zvi’s successor and the reincarnation of King David.

Almost immediately the audience began singing and clapping and continued almost without stop throughout the rest of the concert.

As of late, vintage has definitely been in vogue in the Orthodox community.

Stroll through formal gardens, ride mountain bikes, or go rock climbing.

More Articles from Dr. Yael Respler
Respler-082914

What can we do to help him stop feeling so sad all the time?

Respler-Yael

Perhaps you can reach a compromise during this news frenzy, whereby you will feel more comfortable while he can still follow the latest events.

There could be no Jewish-themed books and, as such, the lack of knowledge these boys displayed in regards to many of the topics we read about was clear.

Upon hearing that he did, the owner sent him the atarah – all shiny and new – to be returned to me. I was reunited with my father’s precious gift.

A prominent shadchan recently articulated a dilemma she’s facing.

The real solution to bullying is to empower the bullied child.

My teachers like me and they tell my parents that I am a great girl with good middos.

Some yeshivish couples do not believe in going out with other couples, but that does not mean that the women cannot have social lives.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/marriage-relationships/technology-important-but-not-indispensable/2012/12/20/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: