web analytics
December 21, 2014 / 29 Kislev, 5775
 
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post
8000 meals Celebrate Eight Days of Chanukah – With 8,000 Free Meals Daily to Israel’s Poor

Join Meir Panim’s campaign to “light up” Chanukah for families in need.



The Anguish And Heartache Caused By Bullying


Respler-111111-Kids

 

After receiving the above reply from Dr. Respler, Anonymous sent the following response: 

Dear Dr. Yael:

Thank you so much for your response. What makes this situation all the more tragic is that it is so unnecessary. My original letter was about my older son. My younger son attended, straight through high school, a non-sectarian school for children with special needs. The foreign-born principal had a zero tolerance policy for bullying. This policy was 100 percent effective, although many of the students were from parenting and behavior environments unlike ours.

It is heartwarming to note that you don’t have to be Jewish to have ruach hakodesh!

*********************************************************************  

Dear Dr. Yael,

About a year ago I sent you a letter taking exception to advice you had given to women who had written in complaining about their husband’s behaviors (Magazine 12-17-2010).  In my letter, which you were kind enough to print, I wrote that you were too respectful of these awful men and that your advice to their wives wasn’t strong enough.

Now, I am delighted to write to tell you how much I enjoyed your response to the woman who wrote how pained she was by her mother-in-law who ignores her and her children (Magazine 10-28-2011).  How, I wondered, could a mother-in-law possibly do that?  Even if she’s distant with the daughter-in-law, how can she be distant with a baby?

You handled the matter perfectly, and I’m sure the writer will take your advice.

(A joke:  Perhaps the mother-in-law doesn’t have the energy to be close to all of her grandchildren and daughters-in-law.  What the young woman needs, therefore, is a shvigger with vigor.)

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous:

Thank you for your letter.   I appreciate your taking the time to write a positive response to my advice.  Generally people will write to me only when they disagree with something I have said, but not so often when they agree with my perspective.

In regards to the aforementioned family situation, I think daughter-in-law was more hurt by the perception that her mother-in-law treats her own daughters with more warmth and love.  However, this type of situation very often goes both ways.  Friends who have been Bubbys longer than I have tell me that their daughters children adore them while their son’s children tend to make them feel like second class citizens.   In those situations it would seem it was the daughters-in-law who were not showing warmth and love.  I would love to hear reactions from readers – from Bubbys, daughters and daughters-in-laws.

 

 

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “The Anguish And Heartache Caused By Bullying”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
Israel Lebanon Peace Project Flag
UN Demands Israel Pay Lebanon $850 Million
Latest Sections Stories
Games-121914

Here are examples of games that need to be played by more than one person and an added bonus: they’re all Shabbos-friendly.

South-Florida-logo

The incident was completely unforeseeable. The only term to describe the set of circumstances surrounding it is “freak occurrence.”

South-Florida-logo

The first Chabad Center in Broward County, Chabad of South Broward, now runs nearly fifty programs and agencies. T

The NHS was also honored to have Bob Diener as keynote speaker.

Written with flowing language and engaging style, Attar weaves a spell that combines mystery, humor, adventure and Kabbalah in the most magical place in the world, the Old City of erusalem.

There are those who highlight the diversity of these different teachings, seeing each rebbe as teaching a separate path.

Rav Dynovisz will be speaking in Hebrew on Wednesday, January 7, at 7:30 p.m.

Rabbi Simeon Schreiber, senior chaplain at Mount Sinai Medical Center in Miami Beach, saw a small room in the hospital that was dark and dismal but could be used for Sabbath guests.

“The secret to a good donut is using quality ingredients and the ability to be patient and give them time to proof.”

I so desperately want to have a loving relationship with my stepsons.

The Liberty Bell is a symbol of American Independence.

Because you can’t have kids pouring huge jugs of oil into tiny glasses, unless you want to turn your house into an environmental disaster.

Try these with your kids; there’s something for every age group and once all the recipes are made, dinner will be ready!

You children will build the country and you will help restore Israel to her former glory.

More Articles from Dr. Yael Respler
Respler-logo-NEW

I so desperately want to have a loving relationship with my stepsons.

Respler-logo-NEW

Isn’t there anyone making a simcha who understands that loud music can cause hearing loss?

My mother thinks of herself as a superior person, has very little feelings for other people, and probably suffers from a deep lack of self-esteem.

Sometimes the most powerful countermove one can make when a person is screaming is to calmly say that her behavior is not helpful and then continue interacting with the rest of the family while ignoring the enraged person.

There are many people today with very little training who put out shingles and proclaim themselves to be marital coaches, shalom bayis helpers, advisers etc.

When one marries someone with children, all family members must accept them.

My mother-in-law is totally devoted to her daughters and their children. Her sons’ children on the other hand are treated like second-class citizens.

How can I help my wife learn to say “no,” and understand that her first priority must be her husband and family?

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/marriage-relationships/the-anguish-and-heartache-caused-by-bullying/2011/11/12/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: