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August 27, 2014 / 1 Elul, 5774
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To A Lonely Wife: Give It A Rest!


Respler-031612

While I appreciate your letter, you are perhaps being harsh on the younger generation. I understand your feelings since I am probably in the same generation as you, and we had no expectations from our parents. In fact, we mostly thought about how we could take care of them. You seem to be reflecting the feelings of many of our contemporaries.

The letter writer appeared to exhibit derech eretz for the parents that were mentioned. As we age, we often realize how hard it is to raise children. This makes us admire our parents more, seeing less of their faults. However, I take issue with you that therapists encourage a lack of derech eretz. In my column, it is imperative that I look at all sides of the situation. Since it is unclear as to exactly what is transpiring, the goal is to promote shalom on all sides.

People sometimes give with too many strings attached. As those factors were unclear in that column, I tried to answer by offering many possibilities. Thank you for taking the time to write. Hatzlachah!

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