web analytics
April 19, 2015 / 30 Nisan, 5775
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post


Great Gratitude: Parenting Thankful Children

Schonfeld-logo1

Be thankful that you don’t already have everything you desire,
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don’t know something
For it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations
Because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge
Because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes
They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you’re tired and weary
Because it means you’ve made a difference.

It is easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks.

GRATITUDE can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles and they can become your blessings.

Author Unknown

The poem above illustrates an important concept – that gratitude or thankfulness can change our lives in many positive ways. Research shows that children can learn to say “please” and “thank you” from the age of eighteen months; however, true gratitude and appreciation takes time to grow and blossom. Experts say that parents can feel successful if they raise adults who embody the grateful spirit. And, gratitude is more than just saying “please” and “thank you.” In fact, recent studies show that grateful people are happier, more resilient, and less depressed. They also have higher self-esteem and better relationships. It is a way of life, and a positive legacy to leave our children.

How can we raise children who will eventually appreciate the positive things that life has to offer? While, of course, it is nice to think that thankfulness should come naturally to children, sometimes it does not work that way. Therefore, below, I have compiled a few tips that may help you gear your children towards the path of gratitude.

Set boundaries. Whether going into a supermarket, toy store or hardware store, explain to your child the purpose of your visit. Will you only be going in to get milk or is he allowed to pick out a snack of his choice? When children understand what to expect, they learn to appreciate the objects they receive. Conversely, if you tell your son that you are only going into the store for milk, but when he whines and screams, you buy him the bag of potato chips that he wants, you are teaching him that the payoff for whining and screaming is a gift. No true gratitude can grow from parents “giving in” to negative behavior.

Give and get. If your child has a growing list of all of the items he wants, let him know that he needs to come up with an equally long list of items that he wants to give. The items can be washing dishes, giving toys to tzedakah, or help a younger sibling with homework. This will help your child understand that material objects do not simply appear when he requests them. Rather, you work hard to be able to provide them for him. Accordingly, he will feel a sense of accomplishment when he earns the items he wants. This sets the wheels in motion for gratitude as he gets older.

Model gratitude. Your child is always watching you, even if you don’t notice. If you model gratitude, by saying “thank you” to the clerk in the grocery store and the car service driver, you are teaching him the proper way to act. In addition, when someone is particularly nice to you, after thanking him or her, you can point out the behavior to your child, “Wasn’t that man so helpful? He picked up all of the groceries that fell out of the bag.” Expressing gratitude yourself helps your child learn to feel it himself.

Volunteer. Perhaps the best way to get your child to feel grateful is to expose him to people from all different walks of life. Take him to a soup kitchen or get involved in bikur cholim. Not only will you be doing a mitzvah, you will both be growing as people. As your child develops, he will notice how much he has and learn to appreciate the wonderful things in his life.

About the Author: An acclaimed educator and education consultant, Mrs. Rifka Schonfeld has served the Jewish community for close to thirty years. She founded and directs the widely acclaimed educational program, SOS, servicing all grade levels in secular as well as Hebrew studies. A kriah and reading specialist, she has given dynamic workshops and has set up reading labs in many schools. In addition, she offers evaluations G.E.D. preparation,, social skills training and shidduch coaching, focusing on building self-esteem and self-awareness. She can be reached at 718-382-5437 or at rifkaschonfeld@verizon.net. Visit her on the web at rifkaschonfeldsos.com.


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Great Gratitude: Parenting Thankful Children”

Comments are closed.

Current Top Story
ISIS affiliates murdering Christian Africans in Libya
African Christians Slaughtered by ISIS-Affiliates
Latest Sections Stories
Lewis-041715-Jewish-Soldiers

During the Second World War, a million and a half Jewish soldiers fought in the Allied armies, the Partisan units in Eastern Europe, and the anti-fascist underground movements in Western Europe and North Africa. These Jewish fighters won over 200,000 medals and citations. The Museum of the Jewish Soldier in World War II in Latrun, […]

Jerusalem Heights Penthouse

The 2-day real estate event will take place in Brooklyn on April 26 and 27.

Schonfeld-logo1

She wasn’t paying attention to what the child did when the mother was not in the room. Rather, her main focus was on what the child did when the mother returned.

The Mets at least have hope for the future with some good young pitchers.

French thinkers of the Enlightenment were generally not pro-Semitic, to say the least.

My Jewish star was battered, indeed it was a wreck
But I picked it up anyway and put it around my neck
To know that hatred mangled it was surely very painful
But just the same to me it is still very beautiful.

A compulsion is a repetitive action. But what underlies the compulsion is an obsession or fear.

When any student in the building is in danger of failing, the equivalent of tornado warning sirens should wail around the school.

It goes without saying that when it comes to your kids, safety is always your number one priority.

After the last of Austria’s Jews were murdered, Albert confiscated whatever Jewish property remained.

How can you expect people who go through such gehenom to even know how to give warmth and love?

More Articles from Rifka Schonfeld
Schonfeld-logo1

She wasn’t paying attention to what the child did when the mother was not in the room. Rather, her main focus was on what the child did when the mother returned.

Schonfeld-logo1

When any student in the building is in danger of failing, the equivalent of tornado warning sirens should wail around the school.

“If you don’t stand straight, you’ll never get a husband.”

A lot of people have heard about dyslexia, a learning disability that concerns reading.

Because birth order can affect most children in similar fashion, there are things you can do to help your children overcome weaknesses that birth order has thrown their way.

Occasionally, a teacher will encounter a student who simply cannot be motivated to do his homework, finish his worksheet or study for a test.

There is a point that many parenting books miss: children do more for us than we do for them.

Tutor. Counselor. The doctor too,
Sometimes it’s hard to keep up with you.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/parenting-our-children/great-gratitude-parenting-thankful-children/2013/06/06/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: