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Helping Our Children Deal With Tragedy (Part I)

2 Iyyar 5768 – May 7, 2008
Dear Rabbi Horowitz: We are all aware of the terrible churban that recently took place in Yerushalayim's Merkaz HaRav yeshiva, where eight precious neshamas were taken from us.

Take A Child To Shul… Please: Emulating The Ways Of Hashem

11 Nisan 5768 – April 16, 2008
A terribly sad version of the expression, "Water, water everywhere, nor any drop to drink," often comes to mind whenever I am approached by single parents (usually mothers) asking me to assist them in finding a caring, responsible adult to take their child or children (usually their son or sons) to shul on Shabbos and/or Yom Tov.

Responding To Your Children’s Questions About The Spitzer Episode

19 Adar II 5768 – March 26, 2008
About eight years ago, I was out walking when our son Shlomie, then 16 years old, called me on my cell phone. He asked me if I heard the news. "What news?" I asked.

Drinking On Purim

5 Adar II 5768 – March 12, 2008
Dear Rabbi Horowitz: As the parents of three teenage boys, we are frightened each Purim that our kids will drink heavily and, chas v'shalom, get violently ill - or worse, get hurt in a car crash.

Princes Indeed

21 Adar I 5768 – February 27, 2008
The Torah relates how the Nessiim, the leaders of each tribe, donated the precious stones that were worn by the Kohen Gadol (High Priest) in his priestly garments, the Ephod and the Choshen.

Should We Keep Our At-Risk Child At Home?

14 Adar I 5768 – February 20, 2008
Dear Rabbi Horowitz: We have six children ranging in age from a married daughter of 22 to a son of eight. Baruch Hashem, things are well with us regarding shalom bayis, parnassah and other areas of our lives.

Changing Schools (Conclusion)

23 Shevat 5768 – January 30, 2008
Our 12-year-old son is not doing well in his 7th grade local yeshiva class. We are considering moving him to another local yeshiva in mid-year, as things are rapidly deteriorating. We are not asking for specific advice, as you do not know him or us. But can you share with us what questions to ask and answers to give when making this difficult decision? Names Withheld

Changing Schools (Part III)

2 Shevat 5768 – January 9, 2008
Our 12-year-old son is not doing well in his 7th grade local yeshiva class. We are considering moving him to another local yeshiva in mid-year, as things are rapidly deteriorating. We are not asking for specific advice, as you do not know him or us. But can you share with us what questions to ask and answers to give when making this difficult decision? Names Withheld

Changing Schools (Part II)

18 Tevet 5768 – December 27, 2007
Our 12-year-old son is not doing well in his 7th grade local yeshiva class. We are considering moving him to another local yeshiva in mid-year, as things are rapidly deteriorating. We are not asking for specific advice, as you do not know him or us. But can you share with us what questions to ask and answers to give when making this difficult decision? Names Withheld

Changing Schools (Part I)

3 Tevet 5768 – December 12, 2007
Our 12-year-old son is not doing well in his 7th grade local yeshiva class. We are considering moving him to another local yeshiva in mid-year, as things are rapidly deteriorating. We are not asking for specific advice, as you do not know him or us. But can you share with us what questions to ask and answers to give when making this difficult decision? Names Withheld

Man Serving Hashem … The Center Of Creation

18 Kislev 5768 – November 28, 2007
The brothers of Yosef referred to him as the "The Dreamer" (Beraishis 37:19). And, while the brothers seemed to have used the title in a disparaging manner, Yosef's life was, in fact, inextricably tied to dreams.

Leadership

11 Kislev 5768 – November 21, 2007
As Yaakov makes his way back to the land of Canaan, several events - spanning the full range of emotions - transpire in rapid succession.

Negotiating With Our Teenager: Understanding The Dynamics Of ‘The Deal’ (Part II)

4 Kislev 5768 – November 14, 2007
Dear Rabbi Horowitz: Our eldest child is in 10th grade at a local Bais Yaakov. She is doing well in school and is generally well-behaved at home. However, over the past year or so, everything we tell or ask her becomes a full-scale negotiating session. It doesn't make a difference what the issue is - curfew, when to do her homework, when to clean her room, etc. It is draining our energy and eroding our relationship with her. Here are our questions: 1. Is this normal? 2. Isn't it disrespectful for children to challenge their parents like this? Neither of us thinks we did this to our parents. 3. Do you have any practical suggestions for us? Names Withheld

Negotiating With Our Teenager: Understanding The Dynamics Of ‘The Deal’ (Part I)

26 Heshvan 5768 – November 7, 2007
Dear Rabbi Horowitz: Our eldest child is in 10th grade at a local Bais Yaakov. She is doing well in school and is generally well behaved at home. However, over the past year or so, everything we tell her or ask her becomes a full-scale negotiating session. It doesn't make a difference what the issue is - curfew, when to do her homework, when to clean her room, etc. It is draining our energy and eroding our relationship with her. Here are our questions: 1. Is this normal? 2. Isn't it disrespectful for children to challenge their parents like this? Neither of us thinks we did this to our parents. 3. Do you have any practical suggestions for us? Names Withheld

Is Everything A 10?

13 Heshvan 5768 – October 24, 2007
One of the techniques I have found most helpful when mediating disputes between rebellious adolescents and their parents is to give the teenager six or eight index cards, and ask him or her to jot down a request or concession that he or she would like his parents to grant.

Shabbat Guests

5 Heshvan 5768 – October 17, 2007
Rabbi Horowitz: We have very different views on the issue of having guests over for Shabbat meals.

On Confidentiality

28 Elul 5767 – September 11, 2007
Rabbi Horowitz: My daughter has confided in me that one of her friends is cutting herself, and she is concerned that her friend may really hurt herself - or worse, chas v'shalom. She made me promise not to tell anyone.

Pre-Marriage Education: The S.H.A.L.O.M. Workshop

This column usually focuses on the issue of teens at risk and finding ways families can become closer to their children. This week, I turn my attention to one of the most important stages before parenthood: the critical period when couples are engaged.

Letter From Your Teenage Child

15 Elul 5767 – August 29, 2007
Dear Mommy and Daddy: Imagine how you would feel if you were told that, two years from today, our entire family would need to relocate to a different part of the country.

Under One Roof

Had I been told a year ago that in a short amount of time my husband and I would have all of our children living with us under one roof, I would have thought it was a joke. Although my husband and I had been working toward this goal for all the years of our marriage, with each passing year it seemed less and less of a possibility.

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