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It is literally pikuach nefesh for this young man to get out of his marital prison as soon as possible, before his will is broken and his ego shattered. He is married only 11 months, and is already being destroyed.

Abusive, twisted women and men bully, manipulate and brainwash their hapless spouses to cut off ties with their families; to give up their friends and whatever else is important to them, even a hobby that they enjoy.  Their relentless, abrasive criticisms and unreasonable demands destroy the neshama.

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Sadly, I know there are readers who can relate to what I am saying for I have read their painful letters over the years in this newspaper’s “Family Issues” section. Parents are heartbroken because a son or daughter is always absent from family simchas or Yom Tov gatherings. The grandchildren from these marriages are strangers, having little or no contact with their uncles, aunts and cousins. The grief and anguish over their loss lasts a lifetime.

I got the impression from the mother that she is encouraging her son to end the marriage. I hope that at this point they are working with a licensed mental health professional who can best advise them in regards to custody and visitation.

As for the rav who dismissed the parents’ concerns, I hope that next time around he will be more careful with his advice.

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