web analytics
October 2, 2014 / 8 Tishri, 5775
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post
Meir Panim with Soldiers 5774 Roundup: Year of Relief and Service for Israel’s Needy

Meir Panim implements programs that serve Israel’s neediest populations with respect and dignity. Meir Panim also coordinated care packages for families in the South during the Gaza War.



Where Have All the Earners Gone – Long Time Passing?


Kupfer-050914

Over Yom Tov, I was privy to a number of discussions that took place at meals, in shul and at the park both in Canada and the United States, where I spent the chag. Despite the geographical disparity, there was one topic that across the board was on the minds of the various young couples – mostly in their late 20’s and early 30’s – as well as their parents whom I had spoken to: the crushing cost of Jewish school tuition, more so than affordable housing.

Typical was the lament of one elegantly dressed young mother who shared that overnight camp was out of the question for her older two kids this year because her third was entering kindergarten. Since her son had “graduated” pre-school, his tuition had now doubled, and her fourth was going to go to pre-nursery.

All in all, this family would be paying over $35,000 for their kids to go to school. Instead of camp, they would take a vacation they could drive to and go to a hotel with a pool for a couple of weeks.

I was kind of taken aback that this family had to “budget” because by any standards they are “well off.”   But her need to cut corners was echoed by her friends, who like her would be viewed as “upper middle class.”   In this particular group, one or both of the parents were in professions that pay quite well – financial advisers, attorneys, accountants, doctors, etc. They were in agreement of the need to “sacrifice” in order to be able to pay tuition which they viewed as a non-negotiable priority.

Some of these couples were out of town guests who lived in various communities and yet, despite their geographical disparity, all were faced with the same issue.

The yearly shelling out of a minimum of $30,000 of one’s net income – which can be the equivalent of $45,000 pre-tax dollars – when you have a mortgage or rent, car payments, and living and work-related expenses can be a challenge even for those earning high wages. And this is for only two or three kids.

Why tuition has skyrocketed is not the point of this article – the reality is that sending several children to yeshiva/day school is a very expensive proposition. What has me greatly perplexed and shaking my head in dismayed disbelief is the mindset that still exists in many communities that young husbands should learn for years, as opposed to one or two, and delay long term their ability to earn a viable income.

If “high” income earners have to be cautious of how they spend their money so they can pay for the necessities of establishing a frum household, the biggest expense of which is arguably paying tuition for several children, and if two “medium” income earners struggle to pay their bills even with a tuition break – chalav Yisrael cheese and pre-checked bags of salad is more expensive than non-chalav Yisrael and unchecked salad – how much more so is it going to be a burden on a one-earner household. With rent, tuition and household expenses, how can a sole-earner not be stressed out and overwhelmed and stretched to her physical, emotional and financial limit?

While it is a given that one of the conditions of a boy going out with a girl in the first place is that her parents agree to provide long-term support – without that guarantee there is no first date which is why so many good girls from middle class homes are being “passed over” and   languishing at home still single – nonetheless, their contribution may not be enough to supplement her wages.

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Where Have All the Earners Gone – Long Time Passing?”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
Jan Morgan, owner of the Gun Cave Indoor Shooting Range.
Arkansas Shooting Range Declares Itself Muslim-Free Zone’
Latest Sections Stories
Israeli winery

“You want to know what this wine looked like, which wine King David drank, white or red…. We can see if it’s red or white, strong or weak.”

Mindy-092614-Choc-Roll

I should be pursuing plateaus of pure and holy, but I’m busy delving and developing palatable palates instead.

Schonfeld-logo1

Brown argues that this wholehearted living must extend into our parenting.

If we truly honor the other participants in a conversation, we can support, empathize with, and even celebrate their feelings.

I witnessed the true strength of Am Yisrael during those few days.

She writes intuitively, freely, and only afterwards understands the meaning of what she has written.

“I knew it was a great idea, a win-win situation for everyone,” said Burstein.

Not knowing any better, I assumed that Molly and her mother must be voracious readers.

“I would really love my mother-in-law …if she weren’t my mother-in-law.”

For each weekly reading, Rabbi Grysman begins with a synopsis of the Torah portion, followed by a focus on a major issue.

It’s Rosh Hashanah. A new year. Time for a fresh start. Time for a new slate. Time for change.

Governor Rick Scott visited North Miami Beach/Aventura on the morning of Wednesday, September 17.

While the cost per student is higher than mainstream schools, Metzuyan Academy ESE is a priceless educational opportunity for children with special needs in South Florida.

Challah-pa-looza helped get the community ready and excited about the upcoming Jewish New Year.

More Articles from Cheryl Kupfer
Kupfer-092614-Books

Not knowing any better, I assumed that Molly and her mother must be voracious readers.

Kupfer-080114

Unpleasant happenings are quickly discarded if they do not affect us directly.

I have always insisted that everything that happens to anyone or anything is min Shamayim.

It is so hurtful to heighten people’s sense of inadequacy and guilt in a matzav that is already horrendous and difficult to bear.

Make no mistake: in the wrong hands cars are weapons of mass destruction.

Where once divorce in heimische communities was relatively uncommon, nowadays every family has a son, daughter, sibling cousin who is divorced – sometimes twice or even three times!

Many go about the business of living frum, observant lives, but they are only going through the motions.

Lately I have been hearing quiet grumblings from people who admit that they regret not encouraging their sons to get a post-high school education after a year or two of learning.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/magazine/on-our-own/where-have-all-the-earners-gone-long-time-passing/2014/05/09/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: