web analytics
September 22, 2014 / 27 Elul, 5774
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post
Meir Panim with Soldiers 5774 Roundup: Year of Relief and Service for Israel’s Needy

Meir Panim implements programs that serve Israel’s neediest populations with respect and dignity. Meir Panim also coordinated care packages for families in the South during the Gaza War.



Special Summershpiel Edition

 


Question: What’s on your summer reading list?



 

 


I’m a little worried that voters will start doubting my military service much as they did that of Bush and Kerry when they were running for office. I’m taking the pre-emptive move of reading The American Civil War: A Hands On History by Christopher J. Olsen so that I can verify to the American public my exact whereabouts and actions during that war.


 – Sen. John McCain, presumptive GOP presidential nominee


 

 

 

 


            The public is already aware of my captivating rhetoric skills, but what troubles me is the accusation that due to my privileged background I can be snobbish and standoffish. Now that Hillary Clinton and I are campaigning together, this is a good opportunity to showcase my interpersonal skills. Of course this will take major effort on my part so I’m reading Working Relationships: The Simple Truth About Getting Along with Friends and Foes at Work by Bob Wall because “Yes I can!


 – Sen. Barack Obama, presumptive Democratic presidential nominee


 


 

 

 


             This has been a very prosperous season for Saudi Arabia and especially for me as president of the High Council for Petroleum and Minerals. The infidels have been consuming large quantities of our oil like swine at the trough. With all this overabundance of revenue I’ve taken out a subscription to Decorating Digest: Craft & Home Projects magazine, so I can learn how to encase my head garb with Svorvsky crystals and decorate my new missile launcher with an “I © Jihad” motif. 

 – King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia

 

 


 


WWE Smackdown! Shut Your Mouth by Bryan Stratton. I love the smell of victory and the kill of the fight no matter if it’s in a courtroom or in a wrestling ring. There’s something about pounding down your opponents until they shrivel up and cry that just makes for a relaxing summer read while sipping lemonade at the beach.


 – Gloria Allred, feminist attorney


 


 


 

 

 

Now that American philanthropist S. Daniel Abraham won’t return my collect calls, I have to seek out an alternative means of gold digging. Sean Kingsley wrote a book last summer called God’s Gold: One Man’s Quest for the Lost Temple Treasures of Jerusalem, which I started to read before being rudely interrupted by missing soldiers, displaced West Bankers, terrorism, and other nonsense. This book discloses the final resting place of the golden candelabrum and other holy relics lost when Roman soldiers ransacked the Temple of Jerusalem, so this will be very beneficial for me.

 – Ehud Olmert, Israeli prime minister

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Special Summershpiel Edition”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
ISIS seized control of Quneitra, at least temporarily, towards the end of August 2014.
Israel Watching Northern Border with Syria, Lebanon
Latest Sections Stories
Calmer Times. Breslov chassidim on erev Rosh Hashanah in 2012 at the grave of Rav Nachman in Uman.

As optimistic as Menachem Rosenberg is – and he said he is going to Uman – he’s sure that this year, most of the travelers will not tour other religious sites or places in Ukraine.

Three sets of three-day Yomim Tovim can seem overwhelming – especially when we are trying to stay healthy.

Plotkin-092614

Is a missed opportunity to do a mitzvah considered a sin?

Teens-Twenties-logo

The sounds and scents of the kitchen are cozy, familiar, but loud in the silence.

Everyone has a weakness. For some people it is the inability to walk past a sales rack without dropping a few hundred dollars. For others, it’s the inability to keep their house organized.

Not enjoying saying no, I often succumbed to requests viewing them as demands I couldn’t refuse.

His entire life was dedicated to Torah and he became a pivotal figure in the transmittal of the Oral Torah to the next generation.

When you don’t have anyone else to turn to… that’s when you’re tied to Hashem the closest.

While we all go to restaurants for a good meal, it is dessert, that final taste that lingers in your mouth, that is the crown jewel of any dining experience and Six Thirteen’s offerings did not disappoint.

Today, fifty years and six million (!) people later, Israel is truly a different world.

There will always be items that don’t freeze well – salads and some rice- or potato-based dishes – so you need to leave time to prepare or cook them closer to Yom Tov and ensure there is enough room in the refrigerator to store them.

In Uzbekistan, in the early twentieth century, it was the women who wore the pants.

This is an important one in raising a mentsch (and maybe even in marrying off a mentsch! listening skills are on the top of the list when I do shidduch coaching).

More Articles from Ita Yankovich
Yankovitch-030714-Houston

Wouldn’t it be great if you had a chavrusa working with you, guiding and helping you in your work environment?

Yankovitch-071913-uniform

In a time when service to one’s community seems to be a forgotten ideal, it is our pleasure to continue sharing with you the stories of those men and women who were willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for freedom.

The Jewish Press recently sat down with Chaya Lipschutz, a Brooklyn woman who saved the life of a stranger.

In the past, people used to turn to coffee or orange juice to get through a midday slump, but today, many are turning to power and energy drinks for a quicker and longer-lasting jolt. The power drink industry is booming with projected sales of $9 billion and no sign of slowing down anytime soon.

Every week nearly three million viewers tune into the Bravo cable channel to watch the hit reality franchise “The Real Housewives” – several shows that follow the lives of affluent housewives and professional women residing in several American metropolitan areas (“The Real Housewives of New York,” “The Real Housewives of Los Angeles,” of Miami, of Atlanta, etc.).

Not too many Jewish World War II survivors from Germany can say that they had the distinction of being both interned in a concentration camp and liberating the captives in that same camp. Erwin Weinberg did just that.

Recently I had the opportunity to spend some times with Bernard (Bernie) Walz and get a glimpse of his war experiences.

As I approached the home of Irving and Miriam Borenstein in the Mill Basin section of Brooklyn, two things became clear: the pride they feel at being Jewish and their joy at living in America. On their front lawn are large American and Israeli flags with a plaque in front which reads:

Never forget the six million murdered in the Holocaust and the three thousand murdered on 9/11.

May G-d remember them for the good with the other righteous of the world.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/magazine/potpourri/special-summershpiel-edition-2/2008/07/16/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: