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The Frum Chess Grandmaster And The Lubavitcher Rebbes

Though Fischer reacted viscerally to even the suggestion that he was Jewish – he was, in fact, a vicious anti-Semite, Holocaust denier, and Israel-hater – his mother was Jewish and his biological father probably was as well.

Can One Be a Shomer Torah u’Mitzvos and Accept Bible Criticism?

Historians currently assume the Bible was written between 720 BCE and 587 BCE, between the destruction of the Northern Kingdom and the destruction of Jerusalem.

Is it True that ‘No One Really Frum Has a TV’?

With this comment Rabbi Schneierson wiped out of Orthodoxy most of observant Jewry including many Haredim.

Lessons For Drivers

Dear Dr. Yael: I am a female driver dealing with challenges of derech eretz while driving in my community. Every time the light is about to turn green, the person behind me seems to immediately honk the horn, yet no one has a problem double-parking, making me feel as if I am driving on an obstacle course.

Israel’s Political Map As Confusing As Ever

JERUSALEM – While it is almost certain that Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu will form the next Israeli coalition government, the country’s confusing electoral system has created another medley of instant political parties headed by a variety of media celebrities and scorned politicians.

It’s Not Always Critical

As the worse in now behind us, and yet with restorations efforts still ahead of us, I believe that the terms utilized so widely this week to describe a terrible predicament should force us to reconsider their use when, thankfully, tragedy doesn’t strike. Though my heart and soul are with those hurt by the storm, I am disturbed that so many of these very adjectives are commonly used to describe common occurrences, a far cry from the critical situation that so many Americans on the East Coast are facing.

When All Else Fails, Play Gin Rummy

He recognized me before I recognized him. We were in Yerushalayim on different sides of the street. He was six foot two waving and yelling my name. “Noach, Noach, Noach Schwartz, the social worker! It’s me Yechiel Klein! Don’t you remember me?” He was wearing a hat, white shirt and suit and looked like a regular bochur from the Mir or Brisk. He did not look like the Yechiel I had met ten years earlier at a clinic in Boro Park.

The Shidduch-Shy

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.” Thus begins Jane Austen’s classic marriage-themed novelwork of marriage, Pride and Prejudice.

Free Choice Vs Costly Obedience

Over the past few weeks, I, like many of you, have received wedding invitations, and I truly hope that the young couples-to-be have chosen wisely and will enjoy long and fruitful unions.

Chronicles Of Crises In Our Communities

Candies are given as rewards in school. I remember when we got stars and stickers. Why are the yeshivas – our "frum culture" – equating reward with gashmius (materialism), and unwholesome at that! Bad for mind and body. Stop it already!

Shidduchim: Why Personality Compatibility Matters

Dear Readers: Much of my private practice is devoted to helping couples in conflict resolve their differences. I have discovered over the years that personality compatibility is an essential component of a happy marriage. Many of the couples I see in therapy struggle with reconciling radically different modes of communicating and coping with life’s issues. As a result, it is often the case that arguments ensue, empathy is strained and estrangement sets in. With that as a backdrop, here are several fictitious vignettes of couples that are personality incompatible.

An Appeal To Readers

Dear Readers: It is Motzei Rosh Hashanah as I write this letter. I have been a therapist for over thirty years and devote a large part of my practice to marital and pre-marital therapy. This year I have had many clients seeking my services after they sought help from other frum therapists. Regarding this, I wish to address the following phenomena:

Hallucinatory Realism

The Nobel Prize in Literature 2012 was awarded yesterday to Chinese writer Mo Yan "who with hallucinatory realism merges folk tales, history and the...

A Colossal But Essential Pain In The Neck

Seven years ago, I was approached by a group of friends with an unexpected request. Would I be interested in running for trustee of my local public school district?

Credible Suspicion

Those of us familiar with the do's and don'ts of accepted practice in the mental health profession saw similar blaring warning lights in our minds, as should have occurred when the facts were made public regarding the accusations against Nehemia Weberman. This case may very well be our community’s most important abuse trial during our lifetimes. It is imperative that we have a huge turnout in support of the victim, a courageous young lady who, may she be gezunt andge’bentched, is determined to see this through to the end so others won't suffer like she did.

The Secret of Turning Misery into Happiness

Feeling like a prisoner, I went along with a shidduch she wanted for me. Baruch Hashem, the girl was sweet and beloved. But I held out hope that after the wedding I'd be able to ask my wife to gradually change. I knew this could cause problems, but I was hopeful. Sadly, after 12 years of marriage and six children, my situation is the same; my wife is unwilling to change. As a matter of fact, contrary to what I had hoped for, the opposite is happening: my wife wants me to change. She says that I am too modern and should become more frum.

Gulliver’s Sukkah

A Toldos Aharon child is playing with the frum equivalent of a doll house in Jerusalem. And, as you can see from the dangling...

Revaluing Motherhood

It is ten o'clock in the morning. I am at a local park with my daughter. A number of children are climbing and sliding, imbibing the fresh air. In their orbit are a smaller number of women, some milling around on foot, others sitting on the benches conversing and minding strollers. Trailing my own child, I play a silent game: Who is a Mommy? Which, if any, of these women (who range from lovingly attentive to disturbingly disengaged) are the children's mothers, and which are babysitters?

All You Need Is Breslov

A planeload of frum guys made its way on Wednesday to Uman, in the Ukraine, for the Rosh Hashanah festivities, despite some unexpected delays...

Struggling With Homosexuality

The Gemarah in Kiddushin (82a) indicates that homosexuality is not something that Jews have to deal with because “Jews are not suspect to be homosexual”. In fact the Rambam (Issurei Biah 22:2) uses this Gemarah as a basis for a Halachik ruling. So, how do we understand this Gemara and Rambam in the light of the many people who present to therapy struggling with this issue?

Preventing Wedding Waste And Wedding Waist

With the Three Weeks and its social restrictions as they pertain to simchas behind us, heimishe Yidden everywhere are "dusting off" their party clothes, taking their jewelry out of the safe and getting ready to attend a multitude of weddings - with some people invited out on an almost daily basis.

A Tale Of A Recovering Internet Addict

What exactly is the definition of an Internet addiction? Just how out of control does one have to be to qualify as having a true addiction?

Is Barack Giving the Priestly Blessing?

OK, you be the judge: this is an official White House image of President Barack Obama talking with patrons during a stop at Lechonera...

Road To Recovery

Dear Readers, I do not regret the past, nor do I wish to shut the door on it. I am now able to understand, feel serenity and know peace. No matter how far down the road I have traveled, I now see how my experiences can benefit others. This is part of the Al-Anon/Nar-anon 12 promises that can be achieved by everyone who “works it.” But I am getting ahead of myself. Let’s start at the beginning:

The Cat Lady’s Message

I was going crazy. I couldn’t stand it another minute. Yes, I was feeling sorry for myself. I had been blessed, b’li ayin hara, with children very close in age. Surely having one child after the other was a blessing to be grateful for. I knew there were many people who would give a million dollars to have such a “problem.” But still, it was very stressful. But that wasn’t the hardest part, and it wasn’t the main reason for my feelings of despair.

July 19, 2012 – An Open Letter To Anyone Who Cares

A couple of years ago The Jewish Press published a letter I wrote about how people treat “kids/teens off the derech.” I wrote about my daughter who had totally left religion and how I felt people could make a difference in these children’s lives; they either inspire them or turn them off. The response to my letter was overwhelming. People contacted me wanting to help and others wrote about their children in similar situations.

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