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April 17, 2014 / 17 Nisan, 5774
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Posts Tagged ‘Sherri Mandell’

Sherri Mandell: The Blessing Of A Broken Heart

Friday, October 5th, 2012

How can one fathom the depths of a mother’s pain upon the brutal loss of her child? Sherri Mandell’s first-born son was viciously murdered near their home on May 8, 2001. How does a mother cope with the news that her spirited thirteen-year-old, while hiking in the neighborhood, was bludgeoned to death by rock-yielding Arabs?

The Blessing of a Broken Heart is the title of Sherri Mandell’s amazing book in which she depicts the process of her coping, of her determination to choose hope and faith over despair and hate. In it Sherri reveals how she struggled to embark on a journey of faith, identifying her agony in the context of 3,000 years of Jewish suffering.

Tekoa, in the Judean Hills, where the Mandell family lives, is 2,177 feet above sea level on a ridge surrounded on three sides by a deep canyon studded by caves. It was one of these caves that Koby and his friend Yosef Ishran went to explore. And it was this cave that became the scene of devastating evil.

Sherri and her husband, Rabbi Seth Mandell, confronted their heartbreak with a conscious decision to transform cruelty into kindness. They created the Koby Mandell Foundation which provides healing programs for families struck by terrorism, allowing them to overcome the isolation that keeps them from returning to life. Participants are helped to find meaning in their loss, so that families become stronger from their traumas. In this way, they keep Koby’s spirit alive.

A New Yorker, with an M.A. in creative writing from Colorado State University, Sherri Lederman visited Israel for the first time in 1984. In Jerusalem she met Seth Mandell, a personable, intelligent yeshiva student. The two were married a year later and made their home in the Holy City where Sherri taught English and creative writing at the Michlalah College.

In 1996, after a short stint in the United States, Sherri and her rabbi husband returned to Israel, the land they loved deeply, with Judaism in the center of their family’s lives. Besides The Blessing of Broken Heart, she authored Writers of the Holocaust, (Facts on File, 2000) and has written for numerous magazines and journals, including The Washington Post, Denver Post and The Jerusalem Post. In addition, she is now director of The Koby Mandell Foundation’s numerous projects, among them the Women’s Healing Retreats for Bereaved Mothers and Widows. The expanse of this column does not accommodate the entire list of offerings of the foundation. I wish merely to mention a unique all-expenses-paid sleepover camp for more than 400 children who have lost loved ones.

One camper explains: “One of the amazing things about Camp Koby is that you are together with other kids who have similar stories. It doesn’t only give us a safe place to be together, but it also gives us a chance to grow outside of camp.”

Camp Koby Sleepaway Camps are fun-filled, six-week summer experiences, an intense and meaningful opportunity for recovery and healing process. In the camps kids have a great time and feel free to express their feelings – both to other children who experienced a similar loss and to Israeli and American counselors who are trained to really understand. In addition to regular activities, therapeutic programs are offered to help the campers cope with the trauma and other emotional issues associated with their tragedy. In addition to Israeli children who are campers, teens from around North America participate as counselors. “I wasn’t looking for a regular summer in Israel; I was looking to give back,” said a15-year-old from Woodmere, New York. “These amazing campers taught me that even if something terrible happens, it is still possible to move on and be happy. I became so connected with them – it changed me as a person.”

I must admit, it changed me, as well. I gained insight into the management of grief through Sherri Mandell’s example and by choosing to participate in the mitzvah. You, too, can share in the mitzvah of transforming cruelty into kindness.

Make check payable to “The Koby Mandell Foundation” and send to: The Koby Mandell Foundation, 366 Pearsall Avenue, Suite #1, Cedarhurst, NY, 11516

Terror Victims’ Rights

Saturday, November 12th, 2011

Now that Gilad Shalit is home, it is time for Israel to have a national discussion about the price of redeeming captive soldiers and the rights of terror victims.

There is an American law, originally called the Koby Mandell Act, that established an office in the Justice Department with the aim of keeping American citizens who are victims of Palestinian terrorism informed and empowered. Perhaps Americans, leveraging that law, can help Israel start the discussion about passing a bill in the Knesset that demands that terror victims’ families be accorded rights in the judicial process.

Sadly, Israel has not paid enough attention to the families of terror victims whose murderers were released. Since Shalit’s release there has been little discussion in the media about those families.

There is an official Israeli government list of released killers but all it says is the name and date of birth of the killer, when he was arrested and what is referred to mysteriously as the solution: where they were sent after their release. The official list says nothing about who was killed. The official list disregards the victims.

As a mother I understand the Shalit family’s insistent campaign to release their son and I would have done the same. But as a citizen I believe it is the job of the government to insist there is also justice for the victims’ families.

The victims’ families must have a voice in any future discussion of prisoner “exchanges.” They are the ones who are traumatized when terrorists are released to celebrate in the streets, to mock the pain of bereaved families, to murder again. All you have to do is view the TV clip where you see the smiling face of the woman who planned the Sbarro suicide murderer when she learns the number of children she killed, and you see the chilling price of this release.

No family should have to go through the hell the Shalit family went through – but at the same time, the government must protect the rights of victims. It is time to pass a law in the Knesset that institutes a terror victims’ rights program in Israel, advocating for the rights of terror victims and their families. There is already a victims’ rights program for criminal law. It is time to extend that protection to terror victims, even in matters of state security.

Further, we need to discuss how Israel can continue as a society where justice is jettisoned so quickly. As a result, the Dutch orphans of the Sbarro attack feel they have to leave Israel because the memory of their parents’ deaths, and the deaths of three of their siblings who were 14, 4 and 2 when they were murdered, is mocked and diminished.

As the mother of Koby Mandell, who was murdered by terrorists, and the co- founder of the Koby Mandell Foundation, which assists families who are bereaved by terror, I work with many of the families whose murderers were released in the recent prisoner “exchange.” We run ongoing support groups for the mothers and summer camps for over 400 bereaved children.

I want to tell you the stories of terror victims’ families so that you will understand the need for families to be included in any future decisions: The pain of the families at seeing their loved ones’ murderers free is indescribable. And the fact that government didn’t inform them before, didn’t prepare them in any way, is reprehensible.

Avichai Levi and Aviad Monstour were 10th graders, murdered in June 2005 on a Friday afternoon. Aviad was on his way home carrying a cake to celebrate his parents’ anniversary. They were both shot at a bus stop. Nechemi Sagron was injured in the same attack. Three months later, the same terrorists killed Yosi Shok, near Beit Hagai.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/indepth/opinions/terror-victims%e2%80%99-rights/2011/11/12/

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