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The Day I Didn’t Lose My Father

I entered the room and saw the body. There were also two men in the room. When they saw me, one asked, "Are you Stan's son?" I was silent. "I guess you are," he said, "You look like he probably did." And then he floored me. "Do you want to identify the body?" The words hit me like a ton of bricks. How could I identify the body of a man who walked out of my life 42 years ago? Would he look anything like the millions of images I conjured up over the years? Would he look like a devil? A demon? I had stopped believing in him when I was about 16. He was a phantom who appeared every now and then in conversation. He got me into a good college - writing about him in my application essay had generated some sympathy.

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Printed from: https://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/parenting-our-children/the-day-i-didnt-lose-my-father/2009/08/05/

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