Rambam says that when the sinner approaches Hashem he expresses Chatati Aviti Pashati; I think I am Mayzid but perhaps I acted B’Shogeg. Or perhaps I thought I acted B’Shogeg but I was Mayzid. Maybe it’s the fault of the parent who failed to educate the child that desecrates Shabbat. When a Jew says Chatati, maybe it was Pashati, L’hachis. Rema rules that L’hachis is carelessness, not necessarily rebellion. A person who drives his car to synagogue may act carelessly and not rebelliously. The sinner approaches Hashem saying You know which sin is unintentional, intentional, careless or rebellious. You can classify them, I cannot. I will express them all in a single confession and ask Hashem to associate them with Slicha, Mchila and Kapparah.
Why does Rambam (Teshuva 2:2) essentially repeat the definition of Teshuva presented in chapter 1? In chapter 1, he includes a word Boshti, shame, he omits in chapter 2. Rambam paraphrases Jeremiah (31:18) mentioning regret and shame in the first part and only regret in the second. Why does Mitzvat Teshuva require Viduy from the individual? If the person is truly brokenhearted and repentant over being cast away from Hashem and wants to return, why recite Viduy? Korban also requires Viduy to be effective. Why is Viduy necessary?
Verbalization clarifies thought. Tanya talks about Nistar and Galuy; the hidden attains a different status once revealed. I can’t be certain about something hidden in my heart. Is it a passing feeling or yearning, or something substantial and permanent? Verbalization facilitates objective evaluation of one’s feelings and emotions, symbolized by Neshalma Parim SfaTaynu. The internal Teshuva spark must find expression as Viduy. The Rav would prepare a lecture (hidden) that he would dynamically revise during delivery (revealed) due to refinement and clarification engendered through verbalization. There is a creative power associated with transforming the hidden into revealed. A person hides from himself. Only Hashem truly understands man. Hashem wants the repentant individual to be honest and recognize his transgressions. He wants repentance to be a lasting feeling not a temporary inspiration. Hence man must verbalize it. (Sefer HaChinuch Mitzva 364). Viduy as concretizing Teshuva is discussed by Rambam in chapter 2. We say Ata Noten Yad Lposhoim and You taught us Lhitvadot, to confess, all our sins in order to instantiate repentance.
There is another dimension to confession extending it beyond Teshuva, where Viduy alone grants atonement after Teshuva. The High Priest confesses for all Jews Chatu Avu Pashu Amcha Yisrael. How can he repent for Klal Yisrael? In this case confession alone atones for Bnay Yisrael. Chazal interpret Vchiper B’Ado U’Bad Kol Khal Yisrael as Verbal Atonement. There are two atonements inherent in the Yom Kippur service. The first is attained by sprinkling the blood of the sacrifices of the day on the altar. The second, associated with the he-goat dispatched off a rocky mountain, was attained through Viduy assuming the status of Korban.
Confession is complex. It is intertwined with heartache and afflictions of the soul. The most self-confident person engaging in self-analysis must realize that he is consumed by and obsessed with doubts. Yet he cannot verbalize those doubts. He is his own biggest doubter. He cannot admit to the contradiction before his eyes. Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi’s students proclaimed that anyone who says Rebbe died should be pierced by a sword. They surely recognized that he died, but they could not imagine continuing without him. Hashem gave man the ability to distance himself from difficult situations. He refuses to verbalize his loss. Yoshev Badad Yidom, man sits alone quietly because he cannot verbalize the loss of his relative. This is Avaylut.
