Marriage and Relationships

When something is not working, when something feels unhealthy, or unproductive it’s smart to step away. Sometimes we need to remove ourselves so we can see what hasn’t been right for us.

It started at the young age of 12 when I became associated with one of the leading rabbis of the last 100 years, Rav Avigdor Miller. He was a genius in human relations and I sucked up as much knowledge as I could learn from him.

All drugs carry risks such as grogginess and other side effects. You should consult your healthcare provider before using any medication.

Sit down with your parents, a dating coach, a trusted mentor, or rebbetzin. Tell them how you feel and how you DON’T feel. Be honest and forthcoming without shame.

You should move if you want to move, but you shouldn’t feel pressured by what other people do or by what other people tell you to do.

Compliments are gifts of love, but they only work if they are sincere and are given freely, without coercion.

Sure, I would not be so glib as to deny that our appearance and even size matter in shidduchim. Perhaps there is even a point in being mindful of what we eat regardless of size or weight. Yet, this question impacts you as a whole, your life, and your goals that supersedes dating.

Is your wife using the silent treatment as a manipulation tactic or is she using it because she doesn’t know how to talk about her feelings?

Be vulnerable. This can feel scary at first, but it is the only way that you will know if you are dating someone worthy of your trust and love.

It is a good idea to start with giving the other person the benefit of the doubt. Some people truly do not realize that they interrupt others often, thus if you frame your words objectively, you are more likely to produce behavioral change.

I would argue that finding your bashert trumps sightseeing and as far as I am aware, couples are still allowed on planes, not just singles.

Black and white thinking is considered to be a cognitive distortion by psychologists because it stops people from seeing life as it truly is, complex, uncertain, and always changing.

It is infectious and we become transfixed by our screens, and laugh and cry at the weddings of strangers who understand so clearly that a wedding is about marriage, love, and the future.

In order to deal with the anxiety you are feeling, you need to identify what you are thinking. You are likely having anxious thoughts. These thoughts are probably swimming around your mind all day and are exacerbating your anxious feelings.

Dearest Minimizers, please, I beg you, listen to me. We know that there are varied levels of sorrow. But our pain counts. It matters, and it should be acknowledged.

Treatment for emotional detachment depends on the reason that is happening. It is important to seek professional help to see why you are having difficulty connecting to others.

It is specifically during sorrow that we feel happiness so acutely. It is then that we truly understand how precious joy can be. How fleeting it can be. We can see blessings so clearly and know that they are gifts that must be cherished.

Notice the positive in your life. When you take time to notice positive moments in your day, your experience of that day becomes more positive.

Once someone learns how to manage their time, they often find that they have more time for things that they enjoy doing. Additionally, when you manage your time effectively you are generally more productive, less stressed, and have more energy.

When mazel and bracha are offered to you, say YES. Do not pass on a first. This is dismissing a gift that has been presented to you.

When we face hardship, we often refocus on what is necessary and right and leave pettiness behind. Perhaps now we can take to heart the objective that dating has always had- to get married and to build a bayit ne’eman b’yisrael.

It would also be helpful for you to go outside of your comfort zone and try new things. The more you broaden your social circle, the more people you will meet, and while you will not be best friends with everyone you meet, you will have more people to hang out with.

As you described, too much comparison leads to unhappiness and low self-esteem. It can also lead to feelings of frustration, jealousy, and hopelessness.

Dating is a commitment. Both parties need to be fully invested and focused on connection, advancement, and the future. When things are going well, this is even more important. Taking an extended break now, can deter the progress that you have made.

As your fathers’s cognitive function continues to decline, his daily life will change. It’s important to create a routine to help reduce confusion and disorientation.

When your family, the shadchan, or a friend, offers you information about a potential match - inquire about her home life and the type of house she grew up in.

Only use your bed for sleep, so your body knows what to expect when you’re in bed.

There are a million reasons why a wife must forego “extras” because they are not able to cover the cost. But this is not low maintenance or high maintenance. This is life as we hope to work toward more comforts in the future.

Building a relationship is a skill. If it’s something you need to work on, you can easily improve.

You are now a girl in shidduchim. This means that everywhere you go and anyone you meet has the potential to help you or hinder you.