web analytics
November 23, 2014 / 1 Kislev, 5775
At a Glance
Sponsored Post
IDC Herzliya Campus A Day on Campus

To mark IDC Herzliya’s 20th anniversary, we spent a day following Prof. Uriel Reichman, IDC’s founder and president, and Jonathan Davis, VP for External Relations, around its delightful campus.

Chronicles Of Crises In Our Communities – 1/08/10



Dear Rachel,

I write this letter to shed light on a modern day holocaust that is taking place in the family courts of New York, one that is causing much emotional, mental, and oftentimes, physical destruction of innocent children.

Brought together by family friends, Joy and Effie were thought to be the perfect couple. And at the age of 27 in an orthodox world, they were long overdue for marriage.

Hints of spousal abuse began early on, but Effie was in the marriage for the long haul. Life was certainly not smooth, and on one Rosh Hashanah the police had to intervene on account of Joy’s physical abuse. But as usual, she asked for forgiveness and promised to “never do it again.”

Effie was of the belief that building a family would strengthen their marriage, and the couple brought two children into the world. After the birth of their second son, however, things spiraled quickly out of control. Joy went over the edge and was eventually admitted to a mental hospital for suicidal thoughts, depression and compulsive defiant disorder, leaving Effie to care for their two young ones -an infant and a 2-year old.

Effie took parenting classes and single handedly raised his children, the elder a special needs toddler. When Joy was released, she was granted supervised visitation and then third party visitations with the boys but was unable to properly conform to timely pick-ups and drop-offs and constantly disobeyed stay-away orders. Her numerous arrests landed the case in the domestic violence division of Family Court.

Since facilitating visitation became next to impossible, pick-ups and drop-offs were mandated to take place at a local police precinct. Joy would bring the children back to the police station improperly clothed and unfed and would verbally assault the officers. Her irrational behavior landed her in jail yet again.

Despite Joy’s repeated visitation abuse and her defiance of stay-away orders, the Judge continually approved additional visitation which had the two children out until 9:00 pm four nights a week, an awkward circumstance that detrimentally interfered with the normal schedule Effie had set in place for his boys. And so he discontinued the visits and was subsequently summoned to appear in court with the children to answer this violation.

His lawyer let him know that the children would either be placed in foster care, or worse still, in the custody of their unstable mom. In a desperate attempt to protect his children from such a terrible fate, Effie fled the city.

He was brought back to New York and arrested for violating the court order, with bail set at $100,000. Unable to pay such an exorbitant amount, Effie was confined in jail for three weeks – while the courts ransacked his account to the tune of $30,000 and distributed the sum among his spouse, her lawyer, etc.

Following his release, Effie was granted supervised visitation by a court-appointed psychologist who found him to be a good father and deemed Joy as troublesome with many anger issues. As a result, the Judge ordered unsupervised visits for Effie with his children twice a week. Needless to say, Joy consistently harassed the boys and their father, attempting to sabotage each and every visit.

If this didn’t cause Effie and the children enough anguish, just before Pesach Joy unilaterally decided to completely discontinue the father’s visitations with them.

In April of 2009, Joy informed hospital personnel that she was feeling unsafe with the two-year old and was unable to control him. With the help of a social worker and law guardian, she placed him in a mental health facility.

Effie had no knowledge of nor had given his consent to this horrific turn of events. While in Effie’s care, their toddler son had been overcoming his disabilities and was integrating into school without any medication. Now, under his mother’s care, he is being medicated and is repeating the same grade again.

Since Effie had not seen his children in over a month, he requested his lawyer to bring a Writ of Habeus Corpus [legal action by which a person seeks relief]. The new presiding Judge signed the writ to produce the children in court. The day prior to the scheduled court appearance, Joy took the two-year old out of the hospital on a day pass (the day happened to be Effie’s visiting day), and returned him that evening. The Judge failed to hold her in contempt, thus setting the stage for further disruption of Effie’s visitations.

To add insult to injury, Joy then fabricated to the courts tales of Effie hurting their son, which prompted the Judge to immediately remove the child entirely from his father – pending hospital records and Child Protective Services reports.

Inexplicably, the law guardian withheld the hospital reports for weeks. The hospital as well as the CPS reports acquitted Effie of any wrongdoing and encouraged a relationship between the father and his toddler son, furthermore disclosing detail of Joy’s ongoing difficulties in controlling the child – and yet the Judge refused to acknowledge these reports. As a direct result of this travesty of justice, the boys have lost all contact with their father to date.

Every hearing is laced with indifference, disinterest and bias towards Effie and the children who are at constant risk with their mom. In a recent incident, the older of the two boys was seen spitting at patrons in a library, kicking doors and pulling the fire alarm lever that caused 300 people to be evacuated, many senior citizens among them.

When will this tragedy end? What will it take to awaken the communities, politicians and courts to reality – to the fact that they are endangering the lives of two beautiful boys who are in desperate need of their father, a parent who desperately craves to look after the children he brought into the world and the one who can provide them with a loving, safe haven, so that two Yiddishe neshomos can bring forth nachas to everyone?

Hashem yishmor!!!

About the Author: We encourage women and men of all ages to send in their personal stories via email to rachel@jewishpress.com or by mail to Rachel/Chronicles, c/o The Jewish Press, 4915 16th Ave., Brooklyn, N.Y. 11204. If you wish to make a contribution and help agunot, your tax-deductible donation should be sent to The Jewish Press Foundation. Please make sure to specify that it is to help agunot, as the foundation supports many worthwhile causes.

If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Chronicles Of Crises In Our Communities – 1/08/10”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
Herzilya's vertical cemetery vaults.
Police Disinter PA Arabs Sleeping Peacefully in Herzliya Graves
Latest Sections Stories

Divorce from a vindictive, cruel spouse can be a lifelong nightmare when there are offspring.


There were many French Jews who jumped at the chance to shed their ancient identity and assimilate.

L to R: Sheldon Adelson, Shawn Evenhaim, Haim Saban

As Rabbi Shemtov stood on the stage and looked out at the attendees, he told them that “Rather than take photos with your cellphones, take a mental photo and keep this Shabbat in your mind and take it with you throughout your life.”


Yeshiva v’Kollel Bais Moshe Chaim will be holding a grand celebration on the occasion of the institution’s 40th anniversary on Sunday evening, December 7. Alumni, students, friends and faculty of the yeshiva, also known as Talmudic University of Florida, will celebrate the achievement and vision of its founders and the spiritual guidance of its educational […]

The yeshiva night accommodates all levels of Jewish education.

Recently, Fort Lauderdale has been the focus of international news, and it has not been about the wonderful weather.

Rabbi Sacks held the position of chief rabbi of the United Hebrew Congregations of the Commonwealth for 22 years until September 2013.

The event included a dvar Torah by student Pesach Bixon, an overview of courses, information about student life and a student panel that answered frequently asked questions from a student perspective.

It is difficult to write about such a holy person, for I fear I will not accurately portray his greatness…

“Grandpa,” I wondered, as the swing began to slow down, “why are there numbers on your arm?”

So the real question is, “How can we, as hosts, make sure our guest beds are comfortable?” Because your guests will never say anything.

It was a land of opportunity, a place where someone who wasn’t afraid of a little hard work, or the challenges of adapting to a different climate and culture, could prosper.

Rule #1: A wife should never accompany her husband to hang out with his buddies at a fantasy football draft. Unless beer and cigars are her thing, that is.

There are many people today with very little training who put out shingles and proclaim themselves to be marital coaches, shalom bayis helpers, advisers etc.

The two World Series combatants, the Kansas City Royals and the San Francisco Giants, were Wild Card teams (meaning they didn’t win their respective divisions) that got hot at the right time.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/chronicles-of-crises/chronicles-of-crises-in-our-communities-218/2010/01/06/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: