web analytics
September 19, 2014 / 24 Elul, 5774
At a Glance
Judaism
Sponsored Post
Apartment 758x530 Africa-Israel at the Israel Real Estate Exhibition in New York

Africa Israel Residences, part of the Africa Israel Investments Group led by international businessman Lev Leviev, will present 7 leading projects on the The Israel Real Estate Exhibition in New York on Sep 14-15, 2014.



One Woman’s Journey (Part Two)

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

When the woman in California appeared in front of her mother with her head covered, she asked a basic question: “How is it, Mom, that you can respect someone dressed in Muslim, Hindu or Christian [nun or priest] garb and yet vehemently object to a Jew in chassidic clothing, or a Jewish man wearing tzitzis and a yarmulke, or a Jewish woman dressed in an Orthodox manner?”

The mother gave a perfunctory response along the lines of “that’s our society.” But the real reason for the different reaction is that the sight of a traditionally dressed Muslim or Hindu does not remind the Jew of his abandonment of Torah. But even a glimpse of a traditionally dressed Jew touches a deep chord of guilty recognition.

The young woman who wrote the letter overcame her problem, and her experiences should serve as a lesson for all of us. Even under the most trying of circumstances she and her husband retained a warm relationship with their parents. The ties between them were never cut. And when she took that big leap and covered her hair – a “no-no” in her mother’s eyes – she continued to speak to her mother respectfully and lovingly. Calmly she explained everything to her parents, and that made all difference – so much so that when on another occasion she expressed some doubts to her mother about her appearance, her mother actually encouraged her, assuring her she looked lovely in her new head covering.

Ba’alei teshuvah need to learn from her experience: When embarking on a path of Torah you must be very careful with the feelings of your parents. You must remember that they have never been in the Torah world. And by embracing this new lifestyle you are, at least to their minds, pointing an accusatory finger at them.

It’s no different from parenting. When you criticize your child and impart rules and regulations, you must do so in a loving but uncompromising manner. If a child rebels and does not accept your instructions, you do not throw him out, nor do you sever the relationship. To the contrary, you try to relate to that child in a loving manner. If he does not respect your beliefs, you wait for the time that he will. Patience and perseverance are a must, but you dare not falter in your convictions. You must remain a role model that your child may one day emulate.

We are living in the days before the coming of Mashiach, and it is written that at that time the “children will bring back the parents.” That phenomenon is unfolding before our eyes. So ba’alei teshuvah must take the initiative in inviting their parents to journey with them on their new path; they must hold the hands of their moms and dads and be spiritual parents to their parents.

Ba’alei teshuvah often bring their parents to my Thursday night Torah class – and for many of those parents it is the very first shiur they’ve ever attended. What a magnificent thing it is to see the generations uniting through the words and teachings of Hashem.

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “One Woman’s Journey (Part Two)”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
Protest rally against Metropolitan Opera staging Death of Klinghoffer on 9/22 at 4:30 pm at the Met.
For Grass Roots Klinghoffer Protest 9/22, Jewish Establishment MIA
Latest Judaism Stories
Hertzberg-092614

Perhaps the most important leadership lesson Elkana taught us is to never underestimate the difference a single person can make.

Teller-Rabbi-Hanoch-NEW

“he’s my rabbi” the Black painter said with pride, pulling out a photo of the Rebbe from his wallet

Rabbi Avi Weiss, head of theYeshivat Chovevei Torah. Rabbi Asher Lopatin will be replacing him as head of the school.

The Torah notes that even when we are dispersed God will return us to Him.

Rabbi Sacks

Simply, for Rambam the number 14 (2×7) was his favored organizing principle.

One of the cornerstones of our Jewish life is chesed, kindness. Chesed can only be taught by example

Our understanding of what is and what is not possible creates imagined ceilings of opportunity for us.

This young, innocent child gave me a powerful, warm surge of energy and strength.

The Chafetz Chaim answered that there are two forms of teshuvah; teshuvah m’ahava and teshuvah m’yirah.

Question: I recently loaned money to a friend who has been able to repay only part of it. This was an interest-free loan. We exchanged a signed IOU, not a proper shtar with witnesses, since I have always trusted her integrity and only wanted a document that confirms what was loaned and what was repaid. Now that shemittah is approaching, what should I do? Should I forgive the loan? And if my friend is not able to repay it, may I deduct the unpaid money from my ma’aser requirement?

Name Withheld

A Role Reversal
‘Return, O Wayward Sons…’
(Chagigah 15a)

When the Kleins returned, however, they were dismayed to see that the renters did a poor job cleaning up after themselves.

In Parshas Re’eh the Torah tells us about the bechira to adhere to the commandments of Hashem and refrain from sin. In Parshas Nitzavim, the Torah tells us that we have the choice to repent after we have sinned.

As Moshe is about to die, why does God tell him about how the Israelites will ruin everything?

Jonah objected to God accepting repentance based on ulterior motives and likely for short duration.

This week’s parsha offers a new covenant; a covenant that speaks to national life unlike any other

More Articles from Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis
Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

One of the cornerstones of our Jewish life is chesed, kindness. Chesed can only be taught by example

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

“There is nothing new under the sun” is as valid today as it was yesterday.

The time immediately preceding Mashiach’s arrival is likened to the birth pangs of a woman in labor.

If we regard pain and suffering as mere coincidence, we will feel no motivation to examine our lives

What does Hashem want of us? That we should protect each other and the awesome heritage He gave us.

Gratitude=Great Attitude. Appreciation is always appropriate.

The two words “thank you” have no time expiration; even if spoken after many years they’re as potent as ever.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/judaism/rebbetzins-viewpointrebbetzin-jungreis/one-womans-journey-part-two/2013/05/22/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: