Wisdom, strength, wealth, and honor are qualities that virtually every individual strives for and are often viewed as markers of success. As Rabbi Reuven Bulka observed, these elements form the totality of one’s existence, touching upon what we do with our mind, body, possessions, and relationships with society. And Abarbanel says, they are the attributes most coveted by society, often placing individuals who excel in them on pedestals.
Yet, Yirmiyahu (9:22) warns that these achievements are hollow and meaningless when sought for the sake of worldly glory. He reminds us, “Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, nor the mighty in his strength, nor the rich in his wealth, but let him who boasts glory in understanding and knowing Me.” Still, there must be something good and right in striving for these qualities. In Nedarim 38a we are told that the Hashem rests his Shechina only on the gibor, ashir, chacham, and anav (parallel to mechubad as we will describe below). The Mishnah applies to Torah study and to our everyday lives.
At the beginning of the fourth chapter of Pirkei Avos, there is the familiar Mishna of Ben Zoma. Ben Zoma redefines these qualities, lays out a path for living and aligns these qualities with higher spiritual purposes. Ben Zoma’s overarching message is twofold. The qualities are accessible to everyone. And the qualities signify not what a person has but what the person is.
Wisdom
“Who is wise?” Ben Zoma says. “One who learns from every person.” We are told in Berachos 58a that when Ben Zoma viewed a large gathering of people, he blessed Hashem who knows the secrets of each person. And he blessed Hashem for creating all these people to serve him (ie Ben Zoma). This is not immodest. Rather Ben Zoma appreciated the uniqueness of each person and the ability to learn from each one.
We can learn from people with good character. And we can even learn from people with bad character how not to live our lives. We can extract true lessons when we hear how an enemy criticizes us. We can learn from children and those in all strata of society. Those with the highest level of chachmah are called talmidei chachamim, students of the wise.
R Zusya of Anapoli (cited in Artscroll Pirkei Avos) said that for his avodas Hashem he learned three things from babies and seven from robbers. Babies are always busy, not embarrassed to cry for their needs, and content when their needs are satisfied. Robbers work away from the eyes of people and never give up hope of success. They are loyal to comrades. Even a small amount of money is important and justifies stealing. They are ready to sell for a minimal price and cover their costs since the main thing is to cover debts. They do not tell of successes or future plans. And they love their profession and would not exchange it for anything in world. All these apply to love of Hashem and mitzvos and the desired path in this world.
Strength
“Who is strong? One who subdues his yetzer (inclination).” Strength is a work in process. It means forever being on guard from temptations that may lure him away from Torah and the good life. Avos d’Rabbi Nosson reads instead, “Who is the strongest of the strong,” because while fighting a battle has an ending, the fight against the yetzer is an ongoing and never ceasing one. The yetzer cannot be destroyed, only sublimated.
Yetzer also means creation. It is the yetzer that moves us to work, to have families, and to build. It has a power that should be redirected for the good. In Shema, we are to serve Hashem “b’chol levavcha,” with the two vav’s, indicated both of your driving forces, the good and the evil.
We need the yetzer to fight against, in order for us to exercise free will and direct ourselves to serving Hashem with greater dedication and strength. The reference to the yetzer is to his yetzer. One has a natural tendency to follow the advice of his yetzer hara, and the yetzer hara knows the sensitivities and faults of each person.
Wealth
“Who is wealthy? One who is happy with his lot.” Again, the emphasis is what is appropriate for a given person. The Chofetz Chaim notes that it says to be satisfied with his chelek, his specific portion. If a person knows that he has exactly what he should, he can be happy with his lot. Each person has a unique tafkid (assignment) in this world and he gets the keilim (instruments) he needs for his task.
There are many sayings describing the tremendous yetzer a person has to acquire more wealth when he already is wealthy: when he has a hundred he wants two hundred. No one dies with more than half of his desired wealth in hand. It is difficult to be satisfied.
There is a famous mashal brought by the Ibn Ezra. A villager sees a princess. He does not desire or covet her because he knows that she is not attainable by him. So we should look at the goods that Hashem has not given to us.
Another way of understanding chelko, his portion, is that it refers to the earthly portion of his entire wealth. A person must recognize that he is getting only a portion now, while the rest he will get in the World to Come. There is the famous story of R. Chanina ben Dosa (Taanis 25a) who was very poor. At the urging of his wife, he asked for a portion of his Olam Haba to be materialized now. A hand came down from Heaven carrying a table leg adorned with gold and precious material. His wife was overjoyed at first but then saw in a vision that their table in Olam Haba was balanced precariously on two legs. They returned the leg to Heaven.
Honor
“Who is honored? One who honors others.” Honoring others is honoring Hashem, and Hashem will reward him with honor (Bartenura). Honor is earned by honoring all men. The Mishnah says all creatures, not just Bnei Yisrael.
Pursuing honor can torture someone. If I seek honor, I set the other person as a judge and make myself dependent on them. Ben Zoma says that the only good approach is to accord honor to others. As it says in Mishlei, “As water reflects a face, so does the heart of man in another.” A person who does not pursue honor but honors others honestly will himself acquire honor as an unlooked-for, automatic consequence.
The quality of honor follows the other three. Someone who has attained wisdom, strength, and wealth may have ga’ava (arrogance). The quality of honor as described by Ben Zoma is actually anava (humility) because he is honoring others. And unique among the four qualities, Hashem adds His blessing in the supporting text cited for the quality (“Those who honor Me, I will honor…”) (Tiferes Yisrael).
Rav Lau brings a story from the Chasdei Avos of a wealthy man who invites the whole town to his wedding. The man disguised himself so he can hear what the townspeople were saying. He heard everyone denigrating him. A short time later another wealthy man made a wedding in the town. The first man again disguised himself and heard the townspeople all praising the second man. He came home and reported this to his wife. She told him that he only sees his own good qualities but others’ deficiencies, while the second wealthy man sees the good in everyone.
Ben Zoma’s redefinitions of wisdom, strength, wealth and honor shift the focus from external achievement to internal character. They offer a roadmap for a life of continuous growth and service to Hashem. His insights remind us that true greatness does not lie in what we possess but in who we are.
Main sources: Irving Bunim, Ethics from Sinai. And Rav Yisrael Meir Lau, Yachel Yisrael.
