Got that pioneering spirit? You’re invited to help build Israel’s periphery by planting roots in southern soil with Nefesh B’Nefesh.
Title: Guide For The Romantically Perplexed
Author: Lisa Aiken, Ph.D.
Publisher: Devorah Publishing.
Jerusalem. 424 pages
You probably know or perhaps are a single Jewish adult who needs this book, and here it is. Popular author Lisa Aiken examines the range of issues plaguing the aging Jewish singles community and she presents the solutions to them. Her “Guide for the Romantically Perplexed” is an easily read, easily understood manual about dating, marriage and remarriage that’s full of
psychologically sound and Torah-true advice.
Aiken opens her book with documented evidence that many spouses lack the necessary skills and attitudes for contributing to a healthy marriage. Her book is designed to help Jewish singles (and spouses) to avoid preventable problems. Simple, profound explanations regarding the fundamental differences in the way men and women perceive the world and the varying
contexts of male/female emotions are among the strengths of the publication.
A list for identifying desirable character traits that will enhance married life and undesirable character traits that “are likely to cause unbridgeable problems” is part of this new manual for creating and sustaining a stable, happy marriage. It could prove invaluable to a conscientious Jew seeking a suitable marriage partner.
Case histories abound (with names changed in order to protect the privacy of the individuals involved), letting readers vicariously see how Aiken addresses their hang-ups or mistaken concepts. When Aiken examines the fundamental drives for companionship that lead to marriage, she demonstrates the foibles of romantic (i.e., unrealistic) fantasies with a mock classified ad. “Multimillionaire, dives Jag, ffb, 6’2″, dark, muscular, and extremely handsome, mid-30′s and semi-retired, seeks heimishe knockout with a Raquel Welch look…” illustrates how and why animal magnetism isn’t the stuff of happy, enduring relationships.
Advancing on to the means and methods for preparing oneself for marriage, Aiken teaches the importance of “Taking Stock of Ourselves” and the concept that marriage is a relationship of mutual effort and satisfaction rather than the degrading use of someone for egotistical pleasure. Passages that explore intimacy, commitment and ethics focus on trust. The line “Contrary to
popular belief, the largest sex gland in the body is the brain,” makes buying the book worthwhile all on its own. The crowds of wistful singles at public (and private) gatherings can go straight to this page and stop mourning their loss of direction in the marriage market.
Aiken makes it clear that “rejecting the secular norms that almost mandate” premature intimacy is part of the path to choosing the right person to be one’s spouse. As to common concerns that a fiancé might change over time, Aiken assures the reader that “No decisions about marriage come with a 100 percent guarantee that everything will work out as you hope. Throughout life, we make decisions based on the best information that we have,” and that a competent counselor can address lingering issues.
The only drawback to the book is its lack of advice on how to help singles over 40, who suffer a paucity of advocates willing to help them to find a suitable spouse. Divorce, custody, fixing troubled marriages, and remarriage issues, however, are all covered in this 424-page hardcover book. And lest the buyer wonder if Aiken views marriage as all work and no fun, know that she also writes about “lightening up,” and “replenishing good feelings.”
A former chief psychologist for Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City, Aiken has written on a vast range of human issues and remains one of the most popular of Jewish authors. A Devora Publishing edition (Jerusalem, Israel), the “Guide for the Romantically Perplexed” is a must-have for communal and private libraries.
About the Author: Yocheved Golani is the author of highly acclaimed "It's MY Crisis! And I'll Cry If I Need To: EMPOWER Yourself to Cope with a Medical Challenge" (http://booklocker.com/books/3067.html). It addresses and solves many needs of disabled, ill and recovering readers.
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Rewind sixty years to 1953.
Television was considered kosher by most and featured the likes of Desi Arnaz, Lucille Ball, Jack Benny, George Burns, Red Buttons, Perry Como, Arthur Godfrey, Clayton Moore as The Lone Ranger, Dinah Shore, Red Skelton, Danny Thomas, Jack Webb as Joe Friday on “Dragnet” and many others who provided great memories.
Yet all are part of one neshamah, planted in rich, verdant soil, determined to grow. May our garden continue to produce a glorious assortment of flowers and trees, each attached firmly to its roots. Our diverse southern vegetation flourishes and grows into different trees, flowers, and fruits, and a rainbow of glorious shades and hues appears. Yet each shoot is rooted in the same soil, stretching its branches and blossoms heavenward in an endless pursuit of growth and connection to the One above.
This past Lag B’Omer, we were blessed to make our first upsherin, where we celebrate our son’s first hair cut. It’s a wonderful milestone that mimics the three years that we refrain from plucking a tree’s first fruits and symbolizes the entry of the child into the world of Torah learning. It’s a clear sign to everyone; this boy is no longer a baby.
Although there are more direct and faster routes to Beer Sheva and Eilat and all the sites and towns in-between, the Basor River is one of the beauties of the Negev that defiantly justifies a diversion.
The importance of death customs has been ingrained in me since birth. When I served as a shomeret for my grandmother, I was instructed not to eat, drink or perform a mitzvah in the same room. In the shock of death, it seemed rather inane to be told it would be considered mocking the dead. My grandmother was gone; she couldn’t do those things because she didn’t exist anymore, a fact that still makes me tear up.
I would have to say that one of the most annoying things about having a newspaper advice column, aside from all these people writing to me and asking for advice, is that they frequently don’t tell me WHY they’re asking.
Rav Yosef Shalom Elyashiv zt”l, who passed away on 28 Tammuz, (July18) this year at age 102, spent all of his days and most of his nights learning Torah. He was the paramount leader of our generation, and inspired tremendous awe and reverence in everyone who knew him. Now, every woman has the stunning opportunity to do something in his memory. A Sefer Torah is being written in his memory and women around the world have the chance to dedicate a letter.
Due to her family situation, it is understandable that she will have more responsibilities than other girls her age, but she would benefit from having some free time and receiving more appreciation for her hard work.
For children, summer means outdoor sports, picnics, and of course, no school! Teachers and students work hard all year long – and everyone deserves a break from education over the summer. However, this two-month break can often have some pretty devastating consequences.
It was only after we celebrated the great news that we were expecting twins that we saw the first sign of problems. First of all, my wife was losing, not gaining weight, even as the babies continued to grow normally. Soon after, routine blood work revealed that my wife was suffering from gestational diabetes.
Rabbi Pinchas Gruman is the new rav of the Minyan at Aish Tamid.
One of the most respected Torah figures in Los Angeles, Rabbi Gruman has been described as “The Los Angeles link in the mesorah of the yeshiva world” by Rabbi Nachum Sauer. As a talmid in Lakewood in the 1950s, Rabbi Gruman received semicha from Rav Aaron Kotler, zt”l, and Rav Moshe Feinstein, zt”l. Soon after, he moved to Los Angeles.
Tehilim 71:9 reads “Do not cast me off in the time of old age; Do not forsake me when my strength fails.” The message is apropos to the endeavor – wonder and spirituality ruled as respect for aging heroes of the Shoah increased among Leo Baeck students.
Title: The Kosher Grapevine: Exploring the World of Wine
Author: Irving Langer
Breathe deeply. You’ll need maximum physical and spiritual power to absorb the uplifting lessons in this book. Page 249 explains why some Jews are praised as “fish on dry land,” a phrase that describes Moshe Rabeinu. Am Yisrael began to appreciate his depth of character at kriat Yam Suf, realizing that “he lived in the revealed world as though he were in the concealed world.”
Author Irving Langer provides his own look at wine-making as well as the nature of the storage barrels used to age wines for taste perfection. He intersperses the book with Jewish historical facts and figures, a few jokes and photographs, and advice on how to pair wines with specific foods.
Unlike formulaic biographies from popular publishing houses in the Orthodox Jewish world, Beyond Politics is not predictable. The vignettes of individual men and women who trekked through Ethiopia and Sudan, flew in from Austria, India, and Algeria, or were born on Israeli soil are gritty, adventurous, and heartwarming.
Title: The Koren Ethiopian Haggada Journey to Freedom: Celebrating Ethiopian Jewish History, Traditions & Customs
Editor: Rabbi Menachem Waldman
Publisher: Koren Publishing
Most of the No-Potato Passover recipes are as casual as the title’s spelling: some include only six ingredients and limited prep time – half to one full hour. They’re good for heart health and waistlines, too.
The Hebrew-English haggada provides a wealth of photographic evidence of the lives led by Ethiopian Jews. The pottery, the unembellished homes, school, and synagogues, the gaunt Jews in modest clothing and head coverings portray dedication to Torah values despite harsh political and topographical conditions.
Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/title-guide-for-the-romantically-perplexed/2003/09/19/
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