As my body seems to be responding to the medication and I am better able to function somewhat normally with short rest periods during the day, I have had a sobering reality check. As long as my husband can withstand the pressure from his family and stay by my side as he says he will, then I, too, will do my best to be the best wife and mother. Hakodosh Boruch Hu will give me the koach to be and our little family will be strong together, in spite of outside influences to the contrary. What I would like to ask you is whether there is a way in which to convince my in-laws to stop trying to interfere in our lives. This is almost as great an ordeal for us to bear as the illness itself. I look forward to reading your response.
Dear Friend,
Every person’s shoulders carry life’s burdens differently, but no burden placed upon them is greater than his or her shoulders can bear. Every life, at one time or another, is touched by tragedy, sickness, misfortune or death. I understand that this observation offers you little comfort and that the crux of your request is not your illness but how to deal with your in-laws who seem to be suffering severe mental deterioration of their own that exacerbates what you are already going through.
First, let me commend your husband, a true Ben Torah, for steadfastly standing by your side against the wishes of his parents. It is a special man whose love and devotion for his wife exceeds all opposition. His support and love for you at this time is as crucial to your health as the drugs themselves are in combating the progression of the illness. Perhaps your in-laws will read this and listen to the language of the heart, where hope and faith live and where miracles have been known to happen. Hopefully, they will understand that although they are concerned for their son’s future, they are not approaching it in the proper perspective. Now is not the time to leave; rather, it is a time for staying and coming together to encourage hope, to offer support for the three of you and to surround you with the love only family can offer. And I truly believe that one miracle will lead to another.
As for you, dear child, I can only offer this. We are living in wondrous time where each day brings new breakthroughs in the field of medical research and disease. I have a friend whom I love dearly, who has been living with MS for as long as I know her, and who has responded beautifully to a regimen of medications that allow her to lead a full and productive life. Yes, she has days where the fatigue is great, where she can’t do too much, but those days are few and far between and her hope never wanes that a cure will be found.
Stay strong in your bitachon, and allow yourself to be insulated by the love and loyalty of your husband and child. Therein lies the beginning of healing and hope for a refuah shelayma bekarov!
