Photo Credit: Jewish Press

I tend to rely on Google Maps a bit too much when I’m driving. I probably know where I’m going, but I doubt myself, worried that I’ll mess up and make a wrong turn somewhere. And when it comes to which GPS app I prefer to use, I’ll often pick Google Maps over Waze.

Waze, as many people are aware, is an Israeli invention, which you can clearly tell by the way they decided to spell the word “ways.” Google Maps just feels more official to me, providing you with a clear voice and instructions that you know what you’re expecting, leaving very little doubt that this woman’s route is the best to take. Waze, on the other hand, feels like an Israeli tour guide or cab driver that tries to convince you he knows a better way to take than everyone else.

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(Israeli accent): “Gever, listen, everyone says to go that way, but they’re stupid. Takshiv (pay attention), I’ve been working here 15 years. I give you a shortcut that will be 20 minutes faster. I’ll even let you know when there’s mishtara so you don’t get ticket. Trust me. We’ll be there in jiffy peanut butter.”

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Eli Lebowicz is a standup comedian. He did 90+ virtual shows during Covid, and is thrilled to perform live again, without having to stare at nostrils through a webcam. He’s a Levi, but doesn’t sing or play instruments, so in the Beis HaMikdash, he’ll probably be the guy taking temperatures. To book Eli for a comedy gig, visit EliComedy.com.