Photo Credit: Jewish Press

She tried to get me married, but instead she found me a job. She matched me up with her daughter. I neglected to ask if I owe her shadchanus. I appreciated her gesture and am thankful to be working. It provides structure to my day and helps financially. It is a few hours a day but gets me going early in the morning with a brisk walk to our office a mile away.

We connected on our first phone call. She called to set me up with a gentleman I had heard about. I knew he did not want to date me and shared with her my story of why not. She related, as someone in her family was similarly challenged. My gut told me I could be candid about my journey. I was not disappointed.


A few months after I married, she called to set me up again. She was thrilled to hear I had met my husband. We schmoozed. I told her I could not work as a social worker because I was not yet licensed in Florida. She heard me and stored the information. I forgot about it.

About two months later, she called to inquire if I want to work for her daughter. My heart danced at her thoughtfulness. Even though the job was not my line of work I enthusiastically accepted. I knew being busy outside of the home would make for a happier me and hence a happier marriage. I was also curious about learning new skills. My “shadchan” strongly recommended me to her daughter, making me feel confident it would work out.

Interestingly, her call came a few days after learning about the power of bentching with concentration. My mother had shared a moving story about a man who remained nourished during the Holocaust because he meticulously bentched. I took the story to heart and pledged to understand what I say. I am a work in progress.

Traditionally, a shadchan makes matches between husband and wife. Perhaps there are other kinds of matchmakers. Mine found me a job. But more so, in her I found a friend.


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