Parenting Our Children

For those who have lost their regular routines, who go to sleep and wake up with uncertainty of what tomorrow will bring, it is likely that they are experiencing anxiety.

Many people feel this rule is for teachers; that is, that teacher should give only a certain amount of homework.

We found flowers and plants in countless colors; we watched people ard at work tending to their gardens and even saw apple, lemon and orange trees.

In continuing our discussion on anger management, I would like to share some basic beliefs that one must understand in their journey to anger management (which I also referred to as personal control). As we have previously discussed, anger control is directly related to self-esteem and confidence. That is, the better the self-esteem, the more capable the person will be in controlling emotions. Also, related to this is the concept we refer to as "shame."

What are the causes behind output failure? Are we discussing actual dysfunctions of the brain – or does the term merely whitewash certain flaws in character?

Sixteen years ago, when I married my husband, I did not give much thought to whether he was Askenazi or Sefardi. Having grown up in what was then a small close-knit Jewish community, it held little importance; my concerns were focused around whether or not my bashert (intended) was Jewish according to halacha, someone who was upstanding in both ideals and actions, and a man solidly committed to a Torah lifestyle.

The only thing we can be sure of as a constant is change. Change is hard and we are often resistant.

In a paper greeted enthusiastically at the May conference of the American Psychiatric Association, in San Francisco, a new name was given to a common problem, Post Traumatic Embitterment Disorder. My initial response: another excuse to drug people. However, upon thinking it over, I think that the word embittered does describe the essence of a serious problem. Many of us suffer from some degree of jealousy and bitterness about the injustices in our lives. But does that make us embittered? I would hope not. So, what characterizes embittered people? Here are some actual examples (the names have been changed):

This doesn’t mean that anyone who occasionally has a piece of chocolate as a pick-me-up is an emotional eater.

Since I did not know much about divorce in those years, I just assumed that this was the "norm." I learned later on how exceptional this family really was.

Dr. Brian Doyle, in his book, Understanding and Treating Adults with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, explains that “When we examine the lives of adults who struggle and fail, repeatedly, sometimes we find symptom patterns like those of children with ADHD…Once they have a proper diagnosis and full treatment, adults with ADHD can change their lives profoundly.”

If you must vary the routine, prepare your child in advance for those changes through logical explanations. If prepared in advance, the transition will ultimately be a lot smoother.

Children develop at different rates – they say their first words, take their first steps, toilet train, read their first word, and lose their first tooth at different times.

Both instilling motivation and creating a safe space are integral parts of learning, helping students feel that they both want to learn and that the conditions are right for learning.

All of us wish to act in kind, compassionate and intelligent ways. We all wish to build character.

What about emotional and mental health issues? How do we get to the root of those? There are diagnostics, tests, and surveys to help diagnose emotional or mental issues. But, we all know that there are times that we get it wrong.

It makes sense that your daughter’s teachers would not have picked up on this in preschool because children are not often forced to speak in the learning process.

Kindness is such an essential Jewish trait that we are told to suspect that a cruel person is not really Jewish. The media constantly uplifts us with inspirational stories about saintly people who radiated love to their fellowman and did their utmost to avoid hurting others. Yet we are also told, "Those who are kind to the cruel will eventually be cruel to the kind" (Koheles Raba 7:16). It is not a kindness to allow ourselves to be abused, exploited or manipulated. By not taking protective action when possible, we encourage destructive behavior. The following stories are examples of naïve and trusting people who paid a heavy price for being overly "nice."

Some say listening works best While others like observing the rest. Some students say they focus more When music, talking, or moving is in store. Others like to sit down and write Knowing the details is what makes them bright.

NFL coach Bill Parcells in Harvard Business Review wrote, “When you set small, visible goals, and people achieve them, they start to get it into their heads that they can succeed.”

Children and teens often face significant challenges that make school life difficult. Whether it’s the anxiety of meeting new people, the fear of rejection, or the complexities that come with learning differences like ADHD, these struggles can hinder their ability to form meaningful relationships.

Certainly today’s communication via e-mail, Facebook, Twitter and the like, including the ubiquitous Whatsapp, has reduced the need to talk with people and communicate at length.

I once received a call from a forty-seven year old distraught mother whose seventeen-year-old son Moti had changed his style of dress, wearing jeans and refusing to wear a hat. She explained that he had gone through a difficult time in school and was now hanging around the house instead of studying in yeshiva. He was also mixed up with the wrong crowd and was associating with at-risk teenagers late at night on the street. She was very concerned as she had an older son who had gone "off the path" and was worried that Moti was going in the same direction. She believed that Moti could be helped if he would be willing to talk with someone.

ear is part of our survival instincts. When we are faced with danger, our body goes into what scientists call fight or flight mode.

This column usually focuses on the issue of teens at risk and finding ways families can become closer to their children. This week, I turn my attention to one of the most important stages before parenthood: the critical period when couples are engaged.

Pesach is a time of freedom – not just from physical bondage but also from limitations that hold us back. Just as Bnei Yisrael prepared for their journey from Mitzrayim by refining themselves, we too can use this time for self-improvement.

Some educators today believe that Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder falls into an executive function category.

It’s the magic ingredient that adds a measure of oomph to the day.

Keep in mind that isolated symptoms are not an indication of dyslexia. Rather, it is only manifest when three or four symptoms consistently appear as a part of a pattern.

How can we become heroic parents? By helping our children learn how to create happiness in their own lives.