Photo Credit: Jewish Press

When we get stuck in any one tense, we start to get tense. This thought struck me as I saw a recent billboard proclaiming, “The past and the future are just a story we tell ourselves.

Getting stuck in the past can lead to depression, and worrying over the future creates anxiety. Both are merely mental stories. Reality is experienced in the present moment but seeing the present in isolation can be problematic.


Hashem views the past, present, and future in synchronization. We too must broaden our scope.

Frustratingly, my husband’s car tire and rim were once destroyed. The cost was exorbitant, and he came home from work to borrow mine.

Our teenager was preparing breakfast. When I came downstairs, the kitchen was filled with ash, soot, and powder from the fire extinguisher.

The microwave had randomly combusted, and a fire broke out.

The only reason my husband was home was because of the flat tire. I shudder to think what could have happened. An unlucky event turned out to be one of the most fortunate moments in our lives – a true kapara.

We were “shvitzing” initially but thanking Hashem later. Don’t sweat the past, present or future; broaden your scope and create your best reality.


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Sarah Pachter is a motivational speaker, columnist, kallah teacher, dating coach, and the author of "Is it Ever Enough?" (published by Feldheim) and "Small Choices Big Changes" (published by Targum Press). She lives in Los Angeles with her husband and five children.