Wysokie Mazowiecie
Recently the Jewish cemetery at Wysokie Mazowiecie held a ceremony marking the first stage of its restoration project.
Tznius (Modesty) – Part III
Are we Teaching Sinas Chinam (Baseless hatred)?
A Recipe for Failure
Last week I wrote about how, through keeping a gratitude journal, we can program ourselves to experience more happiness in our lives. However, just as we can program ourselves to be happier, we can be programmed to be miserable and think less of ourselves. This can happen when someone we trust and respect tells us we cannot accomplish what we have set out to do. When our mentors or role models tell us that we do not have the intelligence or creativity to succeed, we begin to see ourselves as inferior. We begin to think less of ourselves, surround ourselves with a sense of failure and accomplish less because we feel incapable. After all, people rise to the height of their own expectations.
The Nursing Home – Making Placement Easier
Once you have accepted that a care facility is the only way to proceed if both you and your spouse are to survive the progression of the chronic illness, and you have chosen a facility that is appropriate for your spouse, the next step is to adjust to your new role as care giver.
The Right To Know
I had a very wise friend who once told me that when her kids were young, she wanted them to tell her everything that went on in their lives.
Accessibility And Our Community (Part 1)
It is difficult and expensive to make old institutions accessible to wheelchairs.
Shtetl Research
Last week I wrote about going to Nowy Zukowice, the town my grandfather came from.
Men As Caregivers
I have often written my column about women and their experiences as caregivers. It was not my intension to exclude men, however most support groups I attended were either entirely or mostly made up of women. So naturally, I tend to see things from a woman's perspective.
The Children Of The Chronically Ill And Their Battle For Shidduchim
Dear Ms. Novick,
I would like to thank you for your thoughtful column. The information you provide has helped me through the ups and downs of living with a spouse who had MS.
When Your Mind Goes Blank
Most people over 40 have experienced a time or two when their mind just goes blank.
Letting Our Adult Children Be Adults
As parents, it is our job to help our children develop and grow into adulthood in small steps.
Private and Public Acts of Acknowledgement and Empathy
I have often written about the importance of acknowledging someone's pain and showing appreciation for what they have done for us.
Interesting Polish Jewish Web Sites
I am often asked, "Where do you get all the information that you write about in your weekly column?"
Purim In Poland
Purim, one of the most beloved Jewish holidays across the world, is also very popular in Poland. There were Purim celebrations in all the major cities including Warsaw, Krakow, Lodz, Wroclaw and many others. Wherever possible people read the Megillah, gave tzedakah and shared meals.
Bubby
The Gemara in Sanhedrin, Daf Mem Zayin, Amud Alef, concludes that a hesped or eulogy is in honor of the deceased, and not the living, so as such even though I am not worthy of being maspid you, I will say something nevertheless.
How Community Expectations Influence Your Reality
Doubt is a very powerful force. It slowly erodes what we know to be true. It can undermine our self-confidence and even change our reality. Doubt comes from many sources and very often in the form of innocuous comments from friends and family.
Making Lemonade The Positive Memories
I just got off the phone with my oldest grandson. He is four.
Psycho-Neurological Testing
Many well spouses have written to say that their partners' behaviors has changed drastically, making life very difficult for the entire family. "What in my spouse's behavior is choice and what is a result of the illness and beyond my partner's control?" It is a question that tortures many spouses of the chronically ill.
North American Director For Museum Of The History Of Polish Jews
The Museum Of The History Of Polish Jews, based in Warsaw, for a long time has had an office in New York City. With limited staff and resources, the chairman of the North American Council of the museum, Mr. Sigmund Rolat, has worked tirelessly to promote the museum through arranging events. Recently with the growth of activities both in Poland and in the U.S. it was decided to enlarge the North American Council staff. To that goal Robert Socolof has been appointed executive director of North American Council for the Museum Of The History Of Polish Jews.
Workaholics
My generation, for the most part, had a very strong work ethic. It came, perhaps, because many of us grew up as children of immigrants and we inherited it from our parents.
The Life Of A Well Spouse
One question that comes up repeatedly when talking about the lives of well spouses is, "Why do they stay in the marriage?"
Why Do We Give Gifts?
Dear Ann,
I am a well spouse on a fixed and limited income. My neighbor's son, who is friendly with my son, invited himself over for latkes the first night of Chanukah.
Special Occasions
Birthdays, anniversaries, life cycle events are all times we look forward to.
The Desire For Help – The Need To Be Independent
A well spouse must be independent. There is often no partner to call on for help, physical or mental, and so s/he is left to make all the decisions, carry all the heavy things, make all plans and preparations on her own.
In Praise Of Bubby
The Gemara in Brachos says that one is not allowed to add his own praises of Hashem while davening. The Gemara explains that by doing so it could seem that what one added was the only praise missing, and that there are no more praises of Hashem. Similarly, Bubby, for one to try to mention all of your praises would be impossible. With that said I would like to mention a few points, without implying that this is all there is to be said.
Passing The Torch
In just a few weeks we will commemorate the 70th anniversary of Kristallnacht, the day that, for many people, marks the beginning of the Shoah.
A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words (Part 5)
The last cartoon that came out of the discussion with the well spouse group depicted how society sees the well spouse, or should I say doesn't see him.
Are We A Couple Or Not A Couple?
Well spouses with ill partners face a dilemma. Whether the ill spouse's care is long-term hospitalization or a nursing home, the absence of a partner over a long period changes the nature of the family unit.
Death Of A Spouse: Part Two – Preparing
Many well spouses are alone even though they are married. Their partners often cannot participate in the things they loved to do.
Consciousness Raising: Is It Always Good?
Once upon a time we lived with limited expectations. We expected life to be hard and unfortunately it did not disappoint us.