Dear Dr. Yael

We must compliment our children on their internal beauty so they will feel that their character has worth and value.

How Do I Know That He Is THE ONE?

There are three categories that must be met before a couple can decide if they (with Hashem’s help) could make a happy life together.

Invisible Or Instagram

Beyond the idealistic lens of TikTok and the like however, their marriages may be struggling, their children may live life in “time-out” chairs, and they may subsist on day-old takeout.

Use Your Words

Before you allow yourself to continue on this unproductive and dangerous path, take a deep breath and refocus. Revisit the steps that got you to this point.

Forming Relationships Step By Step

I so desperately want to have a loving relationship with my stepsons.

Individuality In Marriage

One of the most powerful dimensions of a successful marriage is a couple’s ability to keep focused on each other's good points and unique personality traits. Too often, people become fixated on the negative, sweating “over the small stuff," and forgetting the positive points that brought them together in the first place.

Tips and Suggestions

When they all try to speak at once, I will ask them to stop and speak one at a time.

Dear Dr. Yael

It is very natural for kids to want attention and to be jealous of each other, especially when there is a new baby.

Part 5 – The Road Map To A Happy Marriage

Finding direction in marriage is similar to going on a long journey. To get to where you want to go, you will need to have a plan that includes directions, supplies and someone to navigate along the way.

Eye Opener

It is frustrating to feel like an afterthought. While I would like to give your date the benefit of the doubt and assume he most certainly wanted to be there, how he presented himself made you feel otherwise.

Tag Me

In a world obsessed with fame we must fiercely protect ourselves from the smoke and mirrors that is social media.

Shidduchim: Why Personality Compatibility Matters

Dear Readers: Much of my private practice is devoted to helping couples in conflict resolve their differences. I have discovered over the years that personality compatibility is an essential component of a happy marriage. Many of the couples I see in therapy struggle with reconciling radically different modes of communicating and coping with life’s issues. As a result, it is often the case that arguments ensue, empathy is strained and estrangement sets in. With that as a backdrop, here are several fictitious vignettes of couples that are personality incompatible.

Recognizing The Signs Of Abuse

Psychologist David Richo defines love in terms of five A's: appreciation, affection, attentiveness (listening), acceptance and allowing (as in allowing others the freedom to fulfill their own dreams). Love is the opposite of control.

Dear Dr. Yael

Your praise should be realistic. Don’t say things that are obviously untrue as children can see through this and it will not feel good to them.

At A Loss For Weight

My experiences with weight loss programs have made me see that the focus is all on the wrong aspect of "fat".

Yankel And Leah – Chapter 10

Yankel bore down so hard while slicing his perogie that his knife made a clink sound on the bone china. Could Abba actually be apologizing for… everything? He shrugged.

Dear Dr. Yael

If this is an emotionally abusive situation, you would need to get your son out of the marriage, but if you can get the couple help and your daughter-in-law changes, the marriage can be saved.

Dear Dr. Yael

Children learn more from what we do than from what we say.

Being A Good Wife Is Sometimes Not Enough

Sometimes a few sessions of marital therapy can solve problems that were festering for years. The married couple have often locked themselves into such a struggle; they need help to simply untangle the knot. This has a lot to do with the high level of emotion they are feeling - just think of the expression "I am so angry I can't think straight. The husband and wife often cannot think logically or clearly. Every issue between them is filled with layers of anger, hurt, betrayal and fear that has built up over the years due to miscommunication.

Interacting With Coworkers

Dear Dr. Yael: I am very happy and successful in my line of work. However, I am having trouble with a coworker and hope you can help me. A few months ago, a new woman began working at my office. We share a workspace and often have to work together on projects. This woman seemed nice, but there have been several awkward situations between us that are really bothering me.

Dating After Divorce

If someone interesting is suggested and he sounds promising to you, go out on a date. Date with honesty and integrity, and expect the same from the men you are set up with.

Unnecessary Upheaval

Living in New York will definitely allow you to access more shadchanim, more singles events, and offer you more exposure to a greater group of people.

Part 1 – The Secret To A Happy Marriage

Are you looking for emotional first aid for your marriage? If you are, you’re not alone. Today engaged couples, newlyweds and couples who have been married for years, are feeling insecure about their relationships and looking for advice on how to make their marriages work better or simply to heal their relationship wounds.

Yankel And Leah -Chapter 5

It was strange that afterward, when he was back in his dormitory room, going over the evening in his mind, he could not even remember the color of Leah’s eyes.

A Rose Among Other Roses

You don’t believe that they would want you, when they could look for girls who come from standard frum homes, and parents who offer more.

Dear Dr. Yael

You mention that your husband was raised with these same painful jokes. Perhaps he was raised in a family where you were not allowed to discuss feelings, so he found a way to express his anger and frustration passively.


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