Parenting Our Children

How does one comfort an individual mourning the loss of a loved one? What does one say so that the grieving person will feel consoled?

As I look back, it is clear that I learned much as an administrator and therapist – and as an individual experiencing life. I hope you will stay with me as I reminisce.

What does it mean to be validated? In what areas of life can one expect to be validated? What attitude, behaviors or actions convey a message (or feeling) to someone that s/he is being validated? How does one validate, or invalidate? What benefits are there to validating and being validated - in the short term as well as long term?

It’s the magic ingredient that adds a measure of oomph to the day.

In a recent New York Times article, Robert Lipsyte, a sports author, posed the following question: “Boys and Reading: Is There Any Hope?” For years, I have been dealing with this question in my office. In fact, the U.S. Department of Education’s reading tests for the last thirty years show boys scoring worse than girls in every age group, every year.

The pictures had been removed from the wall a while back. Carefully and methodically, they had been placed in the back of her desk drawer, a spot that could be reached only if one were looking for something intentionally. Other pictures were inconspicuously hanging in the corner, situated on a wall blocked by a large, mismatched piece of furniture. There were also loose photographs, neatly stacked in their original envelope, discreetly placed in an unmarked folder located in the back of her filing cabinet.

Like I said to you before: never take kids to a store All you're gonna hear is: we want more and more…

Unfortunately, for some children, social learning does not happen naturally, especially those with Asperger’s or other disorders on the autism spectrum.

The brothers of Yosef referred to him as the "The Dreamer" (Bereishis 37:19). And, while the brothers seemed to have used the title in a disparaging manner, Yosef's life was, in fact, inextricably tied to dreams.

If we want to feel good about our careers, our relationships, and ourselves at the end of the day, week, or year, we need to assess what our priorities are and then schedule them into our weeks.

Brown encourages us to see our failures, learn from them, and move forward.

We as parents need to take a step back and allow our children to make mistakes, thereby growing into independent problem-solving adults.

When surrounded by books on a range of topics from science fiction and World War II to graphic novels and deep sea exploration, students will uncover a thrilling and electrifying world.

Sometimes our sight is blurred by the magnitude of our surroundings. As the old saying goes, "you can't see the forest for the trees." Nevertheless, this is very true. Sometimes we don't see the obvious because of other distractions. In our tefillah, we ask G-d to "enlighten our eyes". We often miss the treasures that Hashem has given us; we take them for granted.

Recently a popular Jewish weekly magazine featured a story depicting the life of a young boy whose parents were divorced. Each parent had re-married, establishing new families. Their shared custody of this son, and he spent substantial time with each of his parent's new families. Giving a voice to the child of divorce was the intention of the story. It highlighted the distress children feel as well as the confusing messages they often receive from the adults in their lives.

As children grow, the things that they scare them change, but most children regardless of their age, have rational fears that can be addressed. Just think about yourself – there are things that you still fear even though you are an adult. Of course, there is a difference between rational and irrational fears. So, what fears should you expect from diverse age groups?

Asperger’s Syndrome was first described in the 1940s by Austrian pediatrician Hans Asperger, who noticed that he had many patients who were deficient in social and communicative skills even though they had normal language development and cognitive abilities. Professionals still debate as to whether Asperger’s Syndrome is “high-functioning autism” or whether it is its own disorder completely. Regardless, in 1994, Asperger’s Syndrome was added to The American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) as a separate disorder from autism.

My approach to teaching is to take a “discussion-based constructivist approach” to learning, encouraging children to arrive at their own understanding of Torah through text-based study and a great deal of discussion. I constantly encourage them to think, ask questions and to arrive at their own insights into the Torah.

There’s a lot of work taking place during adolescence that is necessary for teens to develop core character traits for the future. Teens who test boundaries and who have the passion to explore are working on themselves.

We read books of poems and prose – Some of these and some of those. Read some too, and you’ll agree, Books are good for you and me!

Over the many years of providing residential, as well as outpatient care, we realized that children and youth with symptoms of an attachment disorder acted out the most and were difficult children to make immediate progress with.

In addition, if your younger child complains of headaches or stomachaches a lot, especially when he has been home after school with his brother, this could be a symptom of bullying.

In a bustling fifth grade class Moshe is listening to a tape-recorded reading of President Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address, while Shmuel is writing a poem about a fight between brothers. Next to Moshe and Shmuel, Yerucham is reading an account of a former African-American slave.

So, what do we do about grammar? Should we do grammar drills? Should we hope that the students pick it up from reading?

Our Yeshivos and Bais Yaakovs face the growing rate of childhood obesity. "Overweight children are more likely than their normal-weight counterparts to grow into obese adults. Obesity can lead to high blood pressure, high cholesterol, stroke, sleep apnea, type 2 diabetes, heart disease, bone and joint problems, asthma, and several types of cancer," says Chaya Stern, RPA and nutritionist.