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September 3, 2015 / 19 Elul, 5775
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My Sincere Apologies to the Turkish Nation, Can You Ever Forgive Me?

You may not know it, but my name is mud in Turkey, and it's all because I insist on writing my opinion. It's a curse.
Let's face it, antisemites truly believe there's a powerful Jewish cabal out there, and that if one of us Jews gives the word, immediately trained, clandestine teams take off to carry it out...

Let's face it, antisemites truly believe there's a powerful Jewish cabal out there, and that if one of us Jews gives the word, immediately trained, clandestine teams take off to carry it out...

So, it appears that yours truly has gotten an entire country angry at him and that, as we speak, the Turkish high command, along with something they call “MIT” (it stands for Milli Istihbarat Teskilati, or National Intelligence Organization – nothing to do with brainy guys in Boston figuring out the universe) are up in arms over the threat I’ve been posing to Turkey’s national security. Well, kiss that trip to Istanbul good bye. I saw “Midnight Express,” I know the drill.

I’m a little excited, to be honest, I’ve never had a brawl with a country before. For the most part I fight with Jewish crazies who hate Muslims pathologically, with Reform Jews who insist anyone with a checkbook is a Jew, with the Women of the Wall who must have their piece of the rock, with a president who took my money and gave it to my banker – but never with an entire country. It’s strangely exhilarating, I have to say.

It all began about a week ago, with a story that was published in the Washington Post, the gist of which was that one Hakan Fidan, the head of the Turkish MIT, had knowledge of Israeli agents operating in Iran and, guess what, he turned over a list with ten of their names to the Iranians.

Considering the fact that no reputable refutation has been made available so far, and that the Israelis have not denied the story (since they were probably the ones who gave it to the Post in the first place), what Hakan Fidan did was bloody treacherous.

Indeed, last Friday the Turks stopped the denial campaign, which was coupled with accusations against Israel (naturally) and came around to admitting—in a roundabout way—that he probably had done it.

Foreign Minister Ahmet Davutoglu told the Turkish Hurriyet: “When you read these articles, Hakan Fidan is accused of … not letting other intelligence agencies operate in Turkey. Therefore, he is being blamed for doing his job.”

Yet another good man being hunted down for his loyalty to his country and his faith.

Except that what Hakan Fidan has done was usurp a relationship that began in the 1950s between Israel’s and Turkey’s secret services, taking information he received as Israel’s ally and handing it over for execution to Israel’s worst enemies. Now, there’s a man doing his job and being blamed for it. What a victim.

And, according to The Wall Street Journal, Hakan Fidan was behind the arming of Muslim Brotherhood groups fighting in Syria. That’s one shade away from arming Al Qaeda. Also, the WSJ cited senior U.S. officials who said Fidan gave Iran sensitive intelligence collected by the U.S. and Israel.

A true friend, just doing his job. Lay off our Man Fidan, for he represents the highest values cherished by Recep Tayyip Erdoğan’s Turkey: love of country, love of the downtrodden and the Jews done it.

Now, none of the above stories of betrayal and murder-facilitation were anything I, personally, have gathered. I merely reported on the initial Washington Post expose regarding the folks Fidan most assuredly sent to their deaths. But if you google Hakan Fidan, both in regular and news flavors, you’ll get my Jewish Press story well above anything else in the world, including his Wikipedia profile and the original Washington Post column.

All of Turkey reads my article first, before they read anything else on the subject. I’ve been getting Turkish followers on my Twitter account, and Turks have been leaving hundreds of really angry comments on our Facebook page, comments we labor to remove every hour, because they’re not pleasant to read.

That’s because of a nasty note I, in the heat of opining, entered in the flow of my story: “If anyone deserves to find a special surprise in his car one morning, it’s Fidan, the Turkish spy chief.” You’ll have to admit, it’s not exactly a call to arms, it’s an expression of rage at what appears to be a lowlife reminiscent of those Afghani trainees who murder their American patrol fellows, or those Palestinian “security” folks who turned and shot their IDF patrol partners.

Surprisingly, the Turks are not angry at their own security chief for betraying the trust of a close ally—make that two close allies. They’re upset at me, for saying he deserves to be punished. I suppose some of it gets lost in translation. I also think the Turks, like those Muslims who kill people on account of their Muhammad cartoons (you don’t see Bugs Bunny worshipers doing that, now, do you?), should go shopping for a thicker skin. Seriously.

In any event, I am now a major star in Turkey, most likely because of the magical combination “Jewish Press,” which must be the final proof some Turks needed to the fact that whatever blood curdling fantasies they had harbored about Jews was totally true – look at the facts, this Yori Yanover said so, in the “Jewish Press” — that must be the communications organ for all the Jews.

Let’s face it, antisemites truly believe there’s a powerful Jewish cabal out there, and that if one of us Jews gives the word, immediately those trained, clandestine teams everyone knows so much about take off to carry it out. We can argue it ain’t so until we’re blue in the face, it won’t change their minds. Like I told you, they have the convictions of their deep seated antisemitism.

And so, instead of arguing, I will be the big man here, and announce officially that whatever surprises I may have been plotting for Hakan Fidan are now null and void. I order the Mossad to call the hit teams back; likewise the U.S. Seals which we Jews control with Rothchild’s gold must return to base. There will be no surprises for the Turkish spy chief as long as I’m running this cabal.

And tell David Duke his shorts are ready at the cleaner’s, we gave him the special gentile rate but he mustn’t forget the ticket. No tickie…

Great, now I went and started a war with the KKK and China, too.

About the Author: Yori Yanover has been a working journalist since age 17, before he enlisted and worked for Ba'Machane Nachal. Since then he has worked for Israel Shelanu, the US supplement of Yedioth, JCN18.com, USAJewish.com, Lubavitch News Service, Arutz 7 (as DJ on the high seas), and the Grand Street News. He has published Dancing and Crying, a colorful and intimate portrait of the last two years in the life of the late Lubavitch Rebbe, (in Hebrew), and two fun books in English: The Cabalist's Daughter: A Novel of Practical Messianic Redemption, and How Would God REALLY Vote.

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38 Responses to “My Sincere Apologies to the Turkish Nation, Can You Ever Forgive Me?”

  1. 'Tamer TroubleindaHouse says:

    whatever, you try the chasbara like göring in nuremberg… but you are just like eddy barzoon… trying to harass others. Hope you dont end like he did… To do a göring is one shade away from being a zionist…

  2. James Campbell Fern says:

    They throw their own Generals in prison so they are happy to throw your friendship under a bus.Istanbul is fabulous but you never criticize them or call them to task (ask the armenians) or the friendship is over. They don't ntake criticism well.

  3. James Campbell Fern says:

    Personally though, suggesting a surprise as a writer isn't wise in that part of the world. Calling them on their hypocrisy is about all you can do.

  4. Volkan53 says:

    U wrote a lot but said nothing in this article… maybe you are not aware. .

  5. Anthony Kent says:

    If a Turkish person wrote: "If anyone deserves to find a special surprise in his car one morning, it’s Netanyahu", I would not find that terribly droll. As Bob Dylan sang. "Yes, I wish that for just one time, you could stand inside my shoes
    You'd know what a drag it is to see you."

  6. Anonymous says:

    Yosher koach! The Islamic regime controlling Turkey may be evil, but what about the West. It seems that Obama and our NATO allies could care less that the radical Islamic regime in Turkey betrayed Israel by exposing their spy network in radical Islamic, and soon to be nuclear, Iran. It seems they could care less that Israel's Iranian agents have been sadistically tortured while in captivity. They are only upset that the Turkish regime is buying military equipment from China.

  7. anechoix says:

    Now you sound like you have proof which is more noise really. Even if true these agents were possibly planning on bombings or assasinations (like before) in Iran and maybe MIT revealed that. In which case these allegations are blaming Hakan Fidan for preventing such atrocities. Why not try to discover the complete story instead?
    By the way, by the same account one can argue that training Iranians kill fellow Iranians is also lowlife. Go figure out who does that?

  8. Beth Spanier says:

    Awesome response!

  9. TonyJacobs1 says:

    anechoix said: “By the way, by the same account one can argue that training Iranians kill fellow Iranians is also lowlife. Go figure out who does that?”
    Answer: Muslim Brotherhood, Al Qaida, the Taliban and scores of other Islamic fanatic groups.

  10. The Guardian says:

    Yori, I overrule you. The package will be delivered.

  11. Turkey has nailed its colours to the post.Israel must never trust them again.Turkey will be part of Gods end time plan when they come against his people and God destroys them.If I were Erdogan I would fall on my knees and beg God to forgive him and then ask Israel what he/Turkey can do to help them.

  12. Paula van den Dolder says:

    as expected, but he story continues………………

  13. Turkey and Israel are friend countries. Hakan Fidan always thinking Jews advantages. Do not believe wrong informations.

  14. Benny Gamal says:

    I say we stop calling "Salat Turki" (Turkish Salad) that and start calling it
    "Salat Chofshi" – FREEDOM SALAD!

  15. Benny Gamal says:


  16. Golum says:

    Anthony Kent….What the hell are you talking about???? 
    This A-hole and his government of Turkey begs Israel for military & spy help and then repays them by revealing a spy network that was working WITH them….then next week they will be begging the Israeli’s for help again???!!!
    I totally agree with your suggestion of a surprise…may it come for the entire Turkish Government…soon!!!

  17. If you believe in God then everyone should shut the f#*k up let him or her do there job. If you don't, then the end of the world is near and we should all get into a Ferrari and get the bat out of her. Now where did I put my keys?

  18. Basha Kline says:

    this article reminds me of the old addage "I asked Gd for a bike but I know Gd doesn't work that way so I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness…"

  19. Erhan Eryılmaz says:

    Tarihte asla bizim kadar cesur adaletli namuslu şerefli bir ırk olamadığınız için köpek gibi her koldan saldırıyorsunuz bizde hep size cevaben şunu söyleriz '' Havlayan Köpek Isırmaz'' ''İt ürür Kervan Yürür'' siz şerefsizliğe devam edin kahpenin dölleri size son bir sözümüz daha var bizim atlarımız derlerdiki '' Ayı' dan Post Gavur' dan Dost Olmaz ''aslan dostunuz olmadık olmayacağızda bunu böyle bilin …

  20. Erhan Eryılmaz says:

    Tarihte asla bizim kadar cesur adaletli namuslu şerefli bir ırk olamadığınız için köpek gibi her koldan saldırıyorsunuz bizde hep size cevaben şunu söyleriz '' Havlayan Köpek Isırmaz'' ''İt ürür Kervan Yürür'' siz şerefsizliğe devam edin kahpenin dölleri size son bir sözümüz daha var bizim atlarımız derlerdiki '' Ayı' dan Post Gavur' dan Dost Olmaz ''aslan dostunuz olmadık olmayacağızda bunu böyle bilin …

  21. Paula van den Dolder says:

    Seytan Sofrasi,………SS ssssssssssssst.

  22. God is showing true colours of Israel enemies. Thank you.

  23. Chaiya Eitan says:

    And what about Turkish coffee???

  24. Sarah Williams says:

    LOL! I laughed Diet Coke all over myself because I made the mistake of reading this at lunch!! 😀 Way to go!

  25. Amusing and fun on this miserable Monday mid-day in NW Republic of Ireland, isolated in my caravan checking news from Israel. Poor old Kamal will be turning in his grave now Turkey is turning back the years to last days of the Empire. No way Europe is gonna let them already we have problems with Muslims, do we need more?

  26. Mehmet Oktan says:

    What a pathetic writer you are.. With your words you are not only showing your hate againgst Turkish nation but your enemy side too.. I hope true jewish community will manage to fix what you destroyed between two community. And those who supports this dirt.. We are (as Turkish community) very happy to see your real face..

  27. Hilmi Kaçar says:

    So, this is the way that the Jews show their gratitude to the Turks for saving them from the Inquisition in Europe. Don't forget that power relations change continually in the course of history. Perhaps the Christians had after all right by pursuing and massacring the Jews. Continue in your arrogance and remember that Nero was playing violin while Rome was burning. True, the Ottoman state is history and also its tolerance. It is remarkable how soon the jews have forgotten that they were able survive thanks to the Ottoman Turks.

  28. Hilmi Kaçar says:

    The best remedie for ignorance is knowledge: Abraham Galanté, Histoire des Juifs d'Istanbul, depuis la prise de cette ville en 1453 par Fatih Mehmet II jusqu’a nos jours, vol. 1 (Istanbul, 1941); Harry Ojalvo, Ottoman Sultans and their Jewish Subjects (Istanbul, 1999); Moise Franco, Essai sur l’histoire des Israelites des l’Empire Ottoman depuis les origines jusqu’a nos jours (Paris, 1897).

  29. "The dog which is soon to death of time pees on the mosque wall".İt is Turkish saying.So You may not to try the border of our patient. Before Mr. Fidan you will see a surprise in your car…

  30. Asim Ozcelik says:

    Pardon Orda oturan Senmisin ?

  31. I love this look on you, Yori! By the way, in a match between you and Turkey, my money's totally on you. Go get 'em!

  32. Never will the Jews or the Christians be satisfied with thee unless thou follow their form of religion. Say: "The Guidance of Allah,-that is the (only) Guidance." Wert thou to follow their desires after the knowledge which hath reached thee, then wouldst thou find neither protector nor helper against Allah.( Al-Baqarah-120)

  33. radical islamic? Erdoğan kills no babies unlike you jewish scums

  34. Myriam Obadia says:

    Please Deborah, ignore what this walking turd is telling you. We have in Israel a lot of smart and beautiful black Jews of whom we are very proud.

  35. Myriam Obadia says:


  36. Myriam Obadia says:

    Chaiya Eitan According to the Greek, it's Greek coffee and they're ticked off that we keep on calling it Turkish.

  37. Myriam Obadia says:

    Emin, we have no hatred against the whole Turkish people. We do however have a problem with your current government trying to revive the worst aspects of the Ottoman Empire.

Comments are closed.

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