web analytics
December 6, 2016 / 6 Kislev, 5777

Posts Tagged ‘dr’

Dear Dr. Yael

Friday, November 25th, 2016

Dear Dr. Yael,

Now that Yom Tov season is behind us, I wanted to share some of my personal experiences. My friends and I are part of what has been called the “Sandwich Generation” and share similar situations. Yet, we feel more like the “Shmatta Generation.” We all love our married children and grandchildren and many of us are blessed with parents as well. The following is a humorous look at our lives that may help others in our situation.

Our married children arrive usually as close to Yom Tov as possible. Why they can’t come earlier even if they live not so far away is a question none of us can answer. We all wonder why it is that our very frum children, many whom are learning in kollel and have very strict chumrahs in regards to kashrus that we must accommodate, seem very relaxed about arriving on time for Shabbos or Yom Tov.

We also wonder if they allow their children the same amount of freedom in their individual homes as they do in ours. Over Yom Tov our grandchildren turn our homes into scenes that resemble the aftermath of a hurricane. It is amazing what a bunch of little guys can do! If you need a quick demolition team, they can get the job done in no time at all, and they won’t charge you a penny – they will, however, accept payments in cookies, candy and all the junk that is not fit to eat.

If you want chocolate faux paint on your walls, this artistic crew is sure to create original paintings. They also offer free wake up service – at decibel levels you can’t even begin to process.

Don’t get me wrong, I love them all, but having 10 grandchildren under the age of 10 means it gets really wild. The fighting doesn’t stop and wrestling matches go on all day. They say grandchildren bring nachas and simcha – that’s true, nachas when they first arrive and simcha when they leave to go home.

While all our children probably have rules of conduct in their own homes, when they come to us, they are suddenly on vacation. We not only cook and serve, we clean up and babysit.

One amazing story: The day after Yom Tov one of our friends got ready to go to work. As she looked to leave the house, she couldn’t find her car keys – either set. As there had only been one grandchild in her house for the second days, she assumed that either he took them with him or hid them somewhere in the house. She called her daughter who looked wherever she could, but to no avail. Running late, she took a cab to work figuring that when she came home she would say the tefillah for finding things and put money in the pushka.

Later in the day, one of my friend’s younger children decided to look through the house. He found the keys in a closet at the bottom of a case of grape juice – three sets of keys, that is. My friend’s two and her husband’s extra set.

Dr. Yael, as I said, we love our children and grandchildren, but how can we get them to help us keep the demolition crews under control and maybe come a little earlier to help and alleviate our anxiety?

We look forward to your response.

Members of the “Shmatta Generation”

 

Dear Members,

The “Sandwich Generation” definitely has to deal with a lot. Baruch Hashem, many of us have parents and children that require our attention and it can often be overwhelming.

As to why your children show up at the last minute, it could be that they don’t want to burden any of you more than necessary, so they wait until the very last minute to come. It is possible that if you mention wanting them to come earlier, they would. You can say something like, “We love when you come for Yom Tov, but sometimes we worry when you come so close to the zman. Maybe you can come a little earlier, so we don’t have to worry.”

Regarding the demolition team, well that’s not really going to change. Your children should definitely try to have some sort of rules at your house, but the reality is that their kids are off schedule at your house and that makes it hard to police them. The younger generation often have many children close in age and they feel a bit overwhelmed. I often think they don’t realize how much additional work they are dumping on their parents. They may just be relieved not to have to do it all.

Make sure you ask for help with setting and cleaning up and let them know you need at least an hour to lie down, so you can be more refreshed and able to enjoy all the company. Saying something like, “Sweetheart, would you mind helping me in with the food,” will most likely get a positive response. You can also just announce that you need an hour or two to lie down and then you’ll be happy to read to the children or play a game with them. This tells your children that you won’t be available all afternoon to be with the kids, but that you can play with them a little later while they nap.

Communicating your needs in the moment will be most effective. If your children do not respect your wishes after you communicate them, then you may need to have a conversation about it. Most likely, your children are just not thinking about your needs and are not purposely trying to make you into a shmatta.

 

I hope that you continue to enjoy your parents and your children and that you have much nachas from the entire mishpacha!

Dr. Yael Respler

Dear Dr. Yael

Monday, November 21st, 2016

Dear Dr. Respler,

As an avid reader of your largely insightful column, I was troubled by one of the letters which appeared recently that in effect unilaterally excoriated the use of the Internet. Those few students in my literature classes who, over the years, have elected to myopically view the Internet as simply a tool to compromise the integrity of religious observance, rather than embrace it as a unique apparatus designed to facilitate the improvement of academic essay writing and navigate the terrain of literary research, have confronted tedious challenges their tech-savvy classmates had been spared.

Let me be clear, my charges are all frum students in Touro College’s Machon L’Paranasah. They are yeshiva graduates and of chassidic origin; they simply have taken advantage of technology that will eventually allow them to compete in corporate America. More importantly, it has not lessened their zeal to continually ponder Talmudic thought and implement its findings.

It is, respectfully, intellectually disingenuous to suggest that technology is “…killing our community…” Painfully and frustratingly aware of the two-edged sword the Internet poses, it is, assuredly, up to the parents who, in their objective to pass along their spiritual legacy to their progeny, must be cognizant of the fact that secular education must include the latest that technical innovation has to offer. The tech-messiahs of whom you refer may “clearly agree with the rabbanim,” but I also believe that the spiritual and secular can indeed coexist.

Parents need to be more diligent in inculcating their sons and daughters how toxic haphazard usage of the Internet can be. At the same time, for those parents who want their offshoots to successfully meet the demands and challenges of the world marketplace need to take understand how helpful the Internet is; its a device that offers the entire landscape of knowledge at our fingertips.

With respect,

R. N. G., Professor at Touro College and University

 

Dear R.N.G.:

Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to write this important letter.

I am well aware of all the advantages of the Internet and do not believe that there is nothing positive to be found online. The original debate was about the use of cell phones and continued with a letter from a woman who felt her family was addicted to technology.

You are correct that it is up to parents to inculcate their sons and daughters about the toxicity of the Internet. However, what is to be done when the parents themselves are addicted and incapable of setting limits and boundaries?

Certainly in a perfect world, we would all use the Internet only for appropriate matters. Unfortunately, our world is not a perfect one and I and other therapists have seen a whole host of addictions affecting families in our community.

It takes only one click to reach an inappropriate website and be exposed to material that can have serious consequences for marital relationships and healthy views of women.

In essence, there are no clear answers. It seems that the world you live in is one in which students are able to utilize the Internet in appropriate ways. I, on the other hand, live in a world filled with addictions and marital problems that fifteen years ago our community never faced. And it can all be laid at the feet of the technological advances society seems to celebrate.

The issue is incredibly complicated. Our rabbanim don’t experience the “good” the Internet provides; they deal with the broken families and teens who have walked off the derech because of it. Once upon a time, a person who wanted to be unfaithful or a young person who wanted to view inappropriate material did not have an easy time finding outlets. Today, however, the Internet and social media have given us all access to thousands of strangers with whom relationships can be developed. In addition, social media has given us the belief that we have so many friends, superficial relationships to be sure, but for some an easy outlet for inappropriate behavior.

The ability to talk to anyone, anywhere, while amazing in one way, can also be very dangerous. Texting and using Snapchat (where the texts and images are only seen temporarily and cannot be saved) make having inappropriate conversations much easier and much more accessible. People often say things via text that they would never say to someone face to face. I wish I could just publish columns that focus on all the amazing things the Internet has to offer. However, that is not possible.

Thank you for helping to highlight the benefits of the Internet and for helping me explain the issues more clearly. I hope that parents take appropriate steps to safeguard their children so they can become 21st century learners and be successful in this new world!

Hatzlocha!

Dr. Yael Respler

Five Dems Enjoy All-Expenses- Paid Junket with PFLP ‘Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde’

Friday, November 18th, 2016

Seventy-one House members were invited last May to an all-expenses-paid trip to eastern Jerusalem and Ramallah sponsored by the Palestinian Initiative for the Promotion of Global Dialogue & Democracy (MIFTAH), but only five accepted: Illinois congressman Luis Gutierrez, Michigan congressman Dan Kildee, Wisconsin congressman Mark Pocan, Pennsylvania congressman Matt Cartwright, and Georgia congressman Hank Johnson, the Weekly Standard reported Thursday. On May 29 the five Democrats met with Shawan Jabarin, a long-time member of the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine (PFLP).

In 2008, the Israeli Supreme Court pointed out that Jabarin is “among the senior activists of the Popular Front terrorist organization.” A June 2007 decision by the Israeli Supreme Court called Jabarin a “Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde” — human rights campaigner by day and PFLP terrorist by night. Jabarin and his NGO Al Haq are leaders in the “lawfare” campaigns against Israel.

Yona Schiffmiller, director of the North America desk at NGO Monitor told the Standard that “MIFTAH is an organization that is engaged in blatantly anti-Semitic rhetoric, that has spoken very romantically and positively about suicide bombings and things of that nature.”

According to NGO Monitor, MIFTAH has published an article that repeated an anti-Semitic blood libel accusing Jews of using Christian blood to bake Passover matzoh; described one of the first female Palestinian suicide bombers as “the beginning of a string of Palestinian women dedicated to sacrificing their lives for the cause,” and is advocating for BDS.

Prof. Gerald Steinberg, president of NGO Monitor, said in an email: “There is a fundamental problem when public officials can come to the Middle East and casually meet with some of the most vehemently radical NGOs without doing a basic background check into who they will be meeting with. Members of Congress have a responsibility to their constituents to explain why they went on a free trip funded by an extreme and hateful NGO and ended up meeting with an alleged senior member of an internationally recognized terrorist organization.”

JNi.Media

Battling The Scourge Of Cancer, One Drug Cocktail At A Time: The Work Of Medical Pioneer Dr. Howard Bruckner

Thursday, November 17th, 2016

On a balmy evening in a neighborhood restaurant on New York City’s Upper East Side, I sit across the table from renowned oncologist Dr. Howard Bruckner. “Today,” he tells me, “I gave the news to a longtime patient that the cancer was in remission, baruch Hashem.”

A small black yarmulke perched on his head of graying hair, Dr. Bruckner acknowledges the words of the rebbes who call on his help: “Everything but everything in life is orchestrated by Hashem; the doctor is a shaliach.”

He has earned a reputation of being the doctor of last resort for those battling complex gastrointestinal and gynecological cancers with high mortality rates. He notes that Jewish philosophy categorically rejects hopelessness. “A sensible scientific plan and a ‘can do and must try’ attitude benefit everyone and are absolutely necessary.”

Dr. Bruckner explains that he has identified special criteria for integrating lessons learned from testing tumors in leading laboratories. He has further refined these findings in his laboratory in order to integrate them with the most promising clinical treatments from the leading cancer centers. This approach has made formidable inroads in enhancing their application to integrative and personalized medicine, thereby already extending many (and potentially countless) lives.

His earliest discoveries for exceptionally ill patients have now become fundamental parts of standard treatments used both before and after surgery. They substantially improve long-term survival. He hopes that because his current innovations are more potent they will have a greater impact on both heavily treated and new patients than his earlier successes that are now used worldwide.

He explains that from the onset of a patient’s diagnosis tumors are too often already recognizably resistant to standard treatment, and he expresses the hope that the new technology, which can identify resistance, will allow his safer treatments to provide earlier help for many previously resistant patients.

“We’ve discovered,” he says, “that as a result of these treatments, patients with our most challenging cancers often survive two to three times longer and more often. ”

A pioneer in the field of designing new moderate low-dose chemotherapy regimens to treat a variety of tumors that are often resistant to standard treatments, Dr. Bruckner has been a member of more than 20 national professional societies and committees, a consultant and reviewer for numerous professional journals and pharmaceutical and biotechnology companies, and has authored and co-authored more than 150 peer-reviewed reports and articles.

In his 40 years as an academic and full professor, he was a frequently invited speaker for various symposia and lectures. In addition to training at both Albert Einstein College of Medicine and Yale University School of Medicine, Dr. Bruckner has held appointments at Mount Sinai School of Medicine and State University of New York (SUNY) Downstate Medical Center.

He began his own practice in the Bronx in his sixties, when many doctors start thinking of retirement, Under his leadership, the staff of physicians and nurses work as partners with their patients to find the best treatment plan for each.

* * * * *

“My approach,” he says, “is to substantially add to the options offered at major cancer centers; to work toward complementing and refining existing treatment programs. In essence, we are not here to compete with the standard oncology practices but rather to build on them by providing complementary interactive treatments in time to help patients.”

It was while Dr. Bruckner was immersed in immunological research at Albert Einstein Medical College that he was offered a coveted position at the National Institutes of Health (NIH) where he would work with a Nobel prize-winning physician. He did not take that position or an already offered postdoctoral infectious disease position at Harvard. He recalls that during an interview for the NIH position, the associate director of the NIH’s National Cancer Institute (NIC) “told me of a number of best research projects they had started and offered me my choice to join any one of them. I explained to him why each one would not succeed because the technology was not up to par in order to measure the critical pathological factors under study. After giving what I had said some thought, he said I was ‘a very good critic.’ ”

Asked whether he could propose practical research objectives, Dr. Bruckner suggested investigating why therapy causes infections and offered testable stratagems to make cancer therapy safe, which became his key career-long priority.

Startling revelations quickly emerged from Dr. Bruckner’s first experiments as a special assistant to the NCI associate director. Offering an explanation in layman’s terms, Dr, Bruckner said he used a very important but dangerous leukemia drug and injected it into laboratory mice. He then gave the mice antibiotics to protect them from infection, as this mimicked everyday clinical practice. The wholly unexpected finding was that the antibiotic was not helping. The opposite, in fact, was true.

Dr. Bruckner came to understand that the action of antibiotics also improved the use of cancer drugs against the tumors. Most important, recognition of the problem led to solutions, still applied, that make many cancer drugs safe and increase their therapeutic benefit.

He then began to create “models” that mimicked critical problematic strategies in cancer therapy in a lab setting in order to test drugs in depths impossible to achieve in the clinical research. This remains his preferred research method.

“In six months, I showed how the normal human bacteria would affect radiation and drugs, making them safe and unsafe. Bacteria determined the metabolism of the oral and intestine mucosa and bone marrow, and the metabolic rate determined safety.”

After NCI, while at Yale Medical College, Dr. Bruckner found that most international cancer research and treatment had not been applied to ovarian cancer. The ovarian cancer survival rate was a dismal 5 percent. This became a pivotal factor in his decision to move on to Mount Sinai Hospital in New York City where he found a strong working interest in gynecologic cancers. It was also an ideal setting in which to explore the numerous science-based treatment opportunities.

“In essence, we knew about a promising platinum drug that was too toxic to use. I figured out how to use it safely and that led us to discover step-wise how the drugs could work even more effectively without killing people. We made it usable. We have made and can make many drugs safer and more effective.”

* * * * *

It was working on patient safety and ovarian cancer that led to Dr. Bruckner’s novel laboratory and clinical methods designed to optimize drug matching: finding a better and safer dosage and comprehensive team comprised of a cocktail of partners for drugs. This even led to successes with patients suffering from pancreatic cancer, which he describes as perhaps the “worst and most dangerous form of cancer.”

“You can’t just pair any two drugs,” he says. “Drugs that barely work individually will work with the right drug partner, especially multiple partners.” Through his lab work he found multiple simultaneous moderate and low-dose safe partners for combination drug therapy that has since had unprecedented success against resistant cancers.

Recently, leaders in cancer drug development have afforded multi-drug methodology new praise. They recognize a possible HIV analogy, where multi-drug methodology provided both critical safety and efficacy breakthroughs. Dr. Bruckner says that when this approach is applied to cancer it results in not only safer additional drug treatments but also safer drug interactions. It also empowers anti-vascular tumor starving drugs and promotes immune stimulation.

Fern Sidman

Dear Dr. Yael

Monday, November 14th, 2016

Dear Yael,

I was both troubled and saddened by the letter from the mother whose children were abused by the meshulach she and her husband allowed to stay in their home. The pain and harm this man caused is something that cannot be calculated.

While I think your response was the correct one, there was a critical piece that was not addressed. How could the family not have pressed charges? It was misplaced rachamim to feel badly for this man’s family at the expense of their own children. The proper action would have been to press charges against him. This would have sent a strong and appropriate message to their children that if something bad happens, their parents will do everything possible to protect them.

This brings me to my second point. It seems highly likely that this man has engaged in this despicable behavior before and may have even abused his own children. How could they have just sent him back with a warning? How did they even know that he really has a wife and children and, even if he did, that he still lived with them?

Let this be a lesson to all of us to be vigilant in regards to the people we bring into our home and if G-d forbid something does occur, to take the proper steps to deal with it.

R. B.

 

Dear R. B.:

I was happy to receive your letter as I felt the same way that you did. However, as the mother seemed so distraught, and they had already sent him back to Israel, it seemed more prudent to focus on preventing child molestation and/or dealing with it more effectively.

Several years ago, I supervised a number of counselors in different schools. At one point, it became clear that one of these counselors was molesting boys under his care. While we did our best to convince the parents of these boys to press charges, they refused. They did not want their children to have to testify in court.

Often, people who are molested are reluctant to report what happened. As a therapist, you can encourage them to do so, but often their reluctance stems from a fear of being put in the public limelight and having to testify against the person who molested them. Frequently, parents do not want their children to testify for fear it will traumatize them further. This creates a very challenging situation. If those being molested refuse to take action, and often won’t give you information about their molester, there isn’t much a therapist, teacher, counselor or rav can do.

As to your second point, it’s not my job to make a parent feel guilty for something he or she did under duress.

However, as a general statement to our readers, I stress again: Do not let molesters go free. Please report them immediately to the proper authorities. If you don’t, you may be putting other children at great risk.

Also, to parents of children who have been abused: make sure they get immediate professional help. Meet with the counselor/therapist first to ensure that he or she is a good fit. Make sure your child is comfortable with the person. If your child does not want to go for therapy with the person you chose, give it a couple of sessions, and then find someone else if your child is still uncomfortable.

Children must be able to play out, talk about, or draw about their experience. Molestation and child abuse will have lasting effects; however, a child will have a much better prognosis if he or she is given the opportunity to express the pain and take back the control lost through the abuse. Even young children need the opportunity to play out their experience with a competent child therapist.

Remember that children don’t just “forget” what happened to them. They may repress their terrible memories, but this will likely affect them negatively at a later point in time.

Thank you again for your letter and hatzlocha.

Dr. Yael Respler

Dear Dr. Yael

Friday, November 4th, 2016

Dear Dr. Respler,

As a professor of child development in a graduate program and a loyal reader of your column, I want to thank you for the incredibly important public service you have provided over the years. I have often used your excellent insights and well-thought out answers in my classes.

I would, however, like to comment on a point you made to “A Guilty Mother” in the October 7 issue. While most of the suggestions were on point, I do take exception to item number three in which Dr. Susan Schulman advises that parents tell a child to confront the abuser and “tell him that your parents are very strong and you know that he’s just trying to scare you.” I fear that some abusers might panic and do physical harm to the child in order to prevent him or her from reporting what has transpired. Perhaps a better approach might be for the child to appear cooperative and attempt to get away in whatever manner he or she can.

It is very sad that there are predators and pedophiles in our midst that would do harm to our beloved children.

Wishing you hatzlocha,
A devoted reader

 

Dear Devoted Reader:

Thank you for your letter and those very kind words. Thank you also for the opportunity to clarify some points of confusion in regards to that specific column.

Dr. Susan Schulman advises parents to tell their children that anything that is covered by a bathing suit is off limits and cannot be touched by anyone. Everything else in that column was written by myself and Dr. Orit Respler Herman.

You are correct that it’s more prudent to teach our children to run away and let a trusted adult know what happened as soon as possible! While our suggestion was a way of helping a child appear strong, you are correct in saying that some abusers can be violent and this strategy can cause a child to be harmed.

Many abusers seek our children who seem vulnerable; thus it is important that we build up our children’s self-esteem and confidence. When the abuser is a stranger, that confidence can keep the child safe. Unfortunately, when the abuser is a family member, that confidence has no effect.

In addition, I never meant to suggest that victims could choose to be victimized. Anyone can be victimized and no child ever chooses to be in that position. Our hope has to be that a child who has a great amount of self-esteem or confidence will, at the very least, feel comfortable reporting an abusive situation as quickly as possible. It is also imperative that you tell your children that no one can hurt you and they should never be afraid to tell you anything that happened to them. Most importantly, we need to teach our children that inappropriate touch is never okay.

Along these lines, our reactions are very important. We must be sure to remain calm and help them process what happened in an appropriate manner. This is especially true when children are telling us that they got in trouble at school or that they did something wrong. If we yell or overreact to the information they have shared, they will stop filling us in.

This does not mean that you should condone bad behavior; rather, it means you should lovingly explain why what happened was wrong (not that they were bad, but their actions were incorrect) and help them figure out how to act differently in the future. If his or her actions warrant it, a fair consequence can be given, but an incentive for good behavior in the future and helping your child find a better way to handle the situation will likely be more effective.

Having a strong and positive relationship with your children is like an insurance policy. It will protect them from many types of predators and from knowingly entering into harmful relationships. There are, unfortunately, many harmful people who know how to be chameleons. They know how to pretend to be whatever you are looking for during the dating process and in the early stage of friendships. That makes them hard to avoid.

Thank you again for your letter and for helping to clarify our response. May we be zoche to a time in which abuse no longer exists in any form. Hatzlocha!

Dr. Yael Respler

Dear Dr. Yael

Friday, October 28th, 2016

Dear Dr. Yael,

My husband and I were touched by the letter in your column a few weeks ago from a baalas teshuva who felt unaccepted by the people in her community. This is an experience we are familiar with. We are also baalei teshuva. However, another reason we can identify with your letter writer is because we are, at this time, unable to have children.

We are both young and have an unusually healthy lifestyle.  When people would ask us why we didn’t have kids yet, we used to be able to explain that I was still in school. This seemed to satisfy most people, and kept them from asking for a while.  But now, we no longer have that excuse.  We have been accused of being unfamiliar with the Torah, and have been told by some “friends” that their children have no interest in us because we do not have kids.  (We know this to be untrue, but it still pains us – especially as I have a background in early childhood education, and we can see that kids gravitate towards us.)

Not having kids right now has not been a matter of choice for us; in fact, we have been silently working with specialists to identify any issues causing us problems.  We have come across amazing resources and people through this process, and we believe that all of this is part of Hashem’s plan.  At the same time, we are finding it very difficult to live in a community in which most conversations start with a glance at my stomach; in which the decision to go to shul every week hangs on our fluctuating tolerance for an onslaught of baby carriages and pregnant women; in which people rarely talk to us anymore, or invite us for Shabbos, since we’re not part of the “in group.”

We have both lived here for a while now, and have done our best to contribute over the years.  But we are at our tipping point.  You mentioned in your response to the other letter that you could recommend friendly communities – would you be able to elaborate?

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

I understand your dilemma and I think there are two issues occurring in your situation.  I actually think the “children” issue is more challenging for you than your backgrounds.

People who are frum from birth and who come from supportive families suffer as well. Over the years, I have treated many couples struggling from infertility and secondary infertility. Unfortunately, people can sometimes be insensitive and say hurtful things to these couples.

I have had chassidishe couples with two children who wanted more children and were criticized by others for being modern.

I feel uncomfortable recommending specific communities. I will say that I live in Boro Park on a warm and friendly block. Other people may have different experiences. This just goes to show that in different neighborhoods you can have friendly and un-friendly blocks. Thus, all I can suggest is that it may be a good idea for you to look for a different block.

When people are unfriendly to me, I go over and introduce myself, and comment on something positive I have noticed about them. Generally, this helps generate a warm conversation.

If there is someone in shul whom you find bright and interesting, strike up a conversation relating to the davening, the rav and his family etc. Volunteering for a women’s organization in your shul is another good way to meet people.

If you can try to start a conversation with a smile and a compliment and demonstrate interest in the other person, you will be sure to win new friends.

Maybe you can try to create new friends with other couples or other women individually and not be part of a “group” or “clique.”  These “groups” can often lead to the need to keep up with others which can cause shalom bayis problems.

Perhaps you are hurting so deeply due to your struggles with your infertility that you don’t realize that there are other people around you suffering from the same or similar issues.

During our time in galus we are all faced with challenges; some are more obvious and others are hidden. Or, as I like to say, some are wrapped in clear garbage bags and others in black garbage bags.

Your nisyonos are wrapped in black garbage bags. Someone who is clearly struggling with a disease has a nisayon wrapped in a clear garbage bag.  That does not make your situation any less painful.  It may just be that people do not realize that you’re also going through your own struggles.  It’s also possible that others are envious of you because they do not realize what you are going through.  You may present to others as this healthy, educated, with-it couple that may actually be a psychological threat to them.  Obviously this is only a theory since I do not know you or your attitude to others at all.

Although it is so hard to go through infertility, a positive attitude can help.  Think about sharing your situation with one or two other women and asking them to daven for you. This might be a risk, but one worth taking. Only you can decide that. However, if you can foster a friendship with others dealing with similar issues, it can be a source of support to you as well.  I wish you hatzlocha in dealing with this challenge.

Dr. Yael Respler

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/marriage-relationships/dear-dr-yael-93/2016/10/28/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: