web analytics
January 31, 2015 / 11 Shevat, 5775
 
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post


Giving Parental Advice: Is It A Good Idea?

Respler-092713

It is essential that you not feel defensive or nervous during this discussion. You need to ensure that your expressed opinion does not come off as intrusive. However, if you feel nervous and do not think you can speak to your sister calmly, it would be prudent to share your feeling of nervousness with her, showing her that you love her and would never want to hurt her. Being honest about your feelings can only help the situation. And make sure that you do not lose sight of the fact that it’s your sister’s needs – not yours – that must be addressed.

Weigh the pros and cons of the specifics of what you want to say, always remembering that your goal is to be helpful. After all, no one likes being told what to do.

Parenting is often a sensitive topic. We all strive to be good parents on our own while many are consumed by “Jewish guilt” for never being good enough. Thus, hearing parenting advice from a sibling or friend can often be difficult to accept. So when advice is given by relaying a story about a friend as opposed to a personal experience, the counsel is likely to be accepted more readily.

If a more direct approach is warranted, be extremely sensitive and say as little as possible while getting your point across. Take notice that in my aforementioned example, the sister did not mention that her overweight child would be helped. This was purposely done because no one wants to hear that his or her child has problems or is being labeled. Even if we label our children or complain about them, it is still very painful to hear someone else say the same thing about them. Hence the need to be very careful with your tone and lack of unsolicited mussar.

Bottom line: make your case sweet and simple, and then change topics to avoid continuing to talk about a painful subject. Hatzlachah!

About the Author:


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Giving Parental Advice: Is It A Good Idea?”

Comments are closed.

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Current Top Story
The United States condemned Iran for honoring Hezbollah terrorist Imad Mughniyeh but is not so bothered when Abbas honors PA terrorists.
CIA, Mossad Collaborated on Killing Hezbollah No. 2 Leader in Damascus
Latest Sections Stories
South-Florida-logo

The musical production was beautifully performed by the middle school students.

South-Florida-logo

Greige offered a post of her own. She said, “I was very cautious to avoid being in any photo or communication with Miss Israel.” She contends that she was photobombed.

South-Florida-logo

This year, 40 couples were helped. The organization needs the support of the extended Jewish community so that it can continue in its important work.

In the introduction to the first volume, R. Katz discusses the Torah ideal, arguing that the Torah’s laws are intended to craft the perfect man and are not to be regarded as ends unto themselves.

A highlight of the evening was the video produced by the Kleinman Family Holocaust Education Center on the legendary Agudah askan Reb Elimelech (Mike) Tress, a true Jewish hero.

Until recently his films were largely forgotten, but with their release last year on DVD by Re:Voir Video in Paris they are once again available.

Though the CCAR supported the Jewish right to emigrate to Eretz Yisrael, it strenuously objected to defining Palestine as the Jewish homeland.

“Well, you are also part of this class! If someone drills a hole in the boat, the boat will ultimately sink, and even the innocent ones will perish as well. The whole class must be punished!”

Nouril concluded he had no choice: He had to become more observant.

I find his mother to be a difficult person and my nature is to stay away from people like that.

Here are some recipes to make your Chag La’Illanot a festive one.

Does standing under the chuppah signal the end of our dream of romance and beautiful sunsets?

We aren’t at a platform; we are underground, just sitting there.

More Articles from Dr. Yael Respler
Respler-012315

I find his mother to be a difficult person and my nature is to stay away from people like that.

Respler-011615

Often both girls and boys compare their date to their parents.

The Moroccan wife’s chief pride is showing that she ought to win the prize for the most attentive and solicitous spouse and mother.

Both parties need to become more tolerant of one another.

I think a major problem within the “single” community is the pressure to get married ASAP.

How many potential shidduchim are not coming about because we, the mothers, are not allowing them to go through?

I so desperately want to have a loving relationship with my stepsons.

Isn’t there anyone making a simcha who understands that loud music can cause hearing loss?

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/marriage-relationships/giving-parental-advice-is-it-a-good-idea/2013/09/25/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: