web analytics
May 24, 2015 / 6 Sivan, 5775
At a Glance
Sections
Sponsored Post


Chronicles Of Crises In Our Communities

By:
Chronicles-logo

Readers’ Commentary
Re: Great-Grandma’s Not-So-Illustrous Golden Years

Dear Rachel,

Regarding the letter signed, “The Golden Years are not so golden” (Chronicles Oct. 4), I would like to say that I truly sympathize with the bubby and understand that loneliness is painful and difficult to endure. She must feel like all her life’s work has not paid off.

Having said that, I would like to propose some ideas (which she may have tried). There is a Yiddish saying, “Az di gist bista” – if you give then you are. What I am suggesting is that she remember all her grandchildren by sending them a birthday card and a little present and phoning them on occasions such as anniversaries, graduations, chumash seudahs, etc.

There is also truth to her comment about motherhood; it is not always so glorious and wondrous. I live with untold pain as well. My daughter is twenty-one and due to a family situation coupled with the shidduch crisis, the shadchanim don’t call. Seeing her losing her sense of pride and dreams is painful to bear.

In conclusion, many people live with great pain, some from illness, childlessness, or loneliness. There is no one difficulty that encompasses absolute pain above all others, because pain is immeasurable.

No matter what is pressing on our hearts, may we all be granted a yeshua from above.

Continuing to hope and pray…

Dear Continuing,

You’re doing good by hoping and praying, but you might also want to reflect on the following: 1) Hashem, the Master Shadchan, has proven His resourcefulness countless times; 2) your daughter at the young age of twenty-one has no reason not to stand tall and hold on to her dreams; 3) an optimistic attitude and positive frame of mind on her mother’s part will go a long way in encouraging her to follow suit.

Dear Rachel,

I’m glad you set bubby straight. Let’s just say that not too many grown children call their parents daily or are eager to host them for Shabbosim and Yomim Tovim. The lady ought to count her blessings.

On another note, she might be suffering from depression and should inquire about taking prescription medication to lift her mood. To be sure, physical debilitation is a downer, but that’s all the more reason to take advantage of modern medicine available to counter the blues.

Just saying…

Dear Just Saying,

Good point.

Dear Rachel,

The elderly widowed great-grandma surely can’t be having an easy time of it, but I’d like to suggest that it is her attitude that’s keeping her grandkids away. She sounds embittered and it wouldn’t surprise me one bit if she unloads her troubles on her young visitors — not that I’m looking to excuse their negligence. Children and grandchildren have a chiyuv [halachic obligation] to pay honor and respect to their parents/grandparents, regardless of whether the mitzvah comes easy or not.

A smile is catchy

Dear Smile,

We don’t really know, do we? And like you infer, we don’t do a mitzvah because it comes easy. If the woman’s grandchildren would bring their grandma some cheer, she might find reason to smile.

Dear Rachel,

The letter written by the great-grandma brings to mind the new law that was enacted in China a few months back — that all adult children must visit their elderly parents frequently (“elderly” constituting older than 60) and must also make sure that their financial and spiritual needs are met. This law purportedly came about due to the many reports of children’s neglect of their elderly parents.

Ironic, isn’t it?

Dear Ironic,

Forget not that the Chinese government has its own agenda. Their “one-child per family” policy mandated over thirty years ago has come home to roost; while seniors account for over 15% of the country’s population and their numbers are climbing, the country’s work force made up of the diminishing younger generation is shrinking and leaves the government to foot the astronomical bill for elder care.

Thus the driving force behind the Chinese version of kibbud av v’eim was to save the government coffers.

Dear Rachel,

As I was reading about the bubby whose golden years have lost their sheen, I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the negligent children. Yes, I mean the children. Because they fail to realize that what goes around comes around.

About the Author: We encourage women and men of all ages to send in their personal stories via email to rachel@jewishpress.com or by mail to Rachel/Chronicles, c/o The Jewish Press, 4915 16th Ave., Brooklyn, N.Y. 11204. If you wish to make a contribution and help agunot, your tax-deductible donation should be sent to The Jewish Press Foundation. Please make sure to specify that it is to help agunot, as the foundation supports many worthwhile causes.


If you don't see your comment after publishing it, refresh the page.

Our comments section is intended for meaningful responses and debates in a civilized manner. We ask that you respect the fact that we are a religious Jewish website and avoid inappropriate language at all cost.

If you promote any foreign religions, gods or messiahs, lies about Israel, anti-Semitism, or advocate violence (except against terrorists), your permission to comment may be revoked.

No Responses to “Chronicles Of Crises In Our Communities”

Comments are closed.

Current Top Story
Tzipi Hotovely, new Deputy Foreign Minister.
Foreign Minister Hotovely: Tell the World ‘God Gave Israel to the Jews’
Latest Sections Stories
Schonfeld-logo1

To what extent is your child displaying defiance?

Respler-052215

This therapist kept focusing on how “I could do better,” never on how we could make the marriage work.

South-Florida-logo

Mistrust that has lingered after the fiasco in Ferguson, Missouri, has edged the issue forward.

“The observance of a kosher diet is a key tenet of Judaism, and one which no state has the right to deny,” said Nathan Diament, executive director for public policy of the Orthodox Union.

Two weeks of intense learning in the classroom about Israel culminated with Yom Ha’Atzmaut. Students attended sessions with their teachers and learned about history, culture, military power, advocacy, slang, cooking, and more.

The nations of the world left the vessel to sit rotting in the water during one of the coldest winters in decades and with its starving and freezing passengers abandoned.

Rabbi Yisroel Edelman, the synagogue’s spiritual leader, declared, “The Young Israel of Deerfield Beach is looking forward to our partnership with the OU. The impact the OU has brought to Jewish communities throughout the country through its outreach and educational resources is enormous and we anticipate the same for our community in Deerfield Beach as well.”

Our goal here is to offer you recipes that you can make on Yom Tov with ingredients you might just have in the house. Enjoy and chag sameach!

Gardening can be a healthy, wholesome activity for the whole family.

Unfortunately, the probability is that he will not see a reason to change as he has been acting this way for a long time and clearly has some issues with respecting women.

All of these small changes work their way into the framework of the elephant and the rider because they are helping the elephant move forward.

It’s hard not to be intrigued by recipes with names like Thanksgiving Stuffing Soup, Braised Chicken with Rhubarb Gravy and Vidalia Onion Fritters with Sambal Yogurt Dip.

Printed from: http://www.jewishpress.com/sections/family/chronicles-of-crises/chronicles-of-crises-in-our-communities-272/2013/10/18/

Scan this QR code to visit this page online: