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May 23, 2013 /14 Sivan, 5773
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The Tosfos Yomtov was convinced that the death of 300,000 –600,000 Jews during the Chmielnicki massacres of 1648-49 were because of improper Tefila. Communicated: Tefilla

Chillul Tefila Bifarhesia, as well as halachicly challenged verbiage and dress, are external manifestations of a critical lack of personal yiras shomayim which has lethal consequences.



Our Jewish DNA


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Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

I’d like to share with you a story I believe is a wonderful gift we can present to Hashem now that the painful summer months of Tammuz and Av – months that saw the destruction of our holy Temple – are nearly upon us.

The story is an awesome testimony to the chesed of our people – a trait we inherited from Avraham Avinu and from all the Avos and Emahos of Am Yisrael. This chesed is part of our Jewish DNA and no cultural mores or societal pressures can erase it.

As regular readers know, I have written several columns regarding my recent hospitalization and surgery in San Diego for a broken hip. In one of those columns I described the painful experience of learning to walk again. Jeanette, my physical therapist, would ask daily, “Rebbetzin, level of pain – one to ten?”

I never quite knew how to evaluate “one to ten.” In my mind it was always a ten, but to please my kind, caring therapist I would choose a number and always add, “Baruch Hashem.”

“What are those words you always add to your numbers?” she asked.

“Baruch Hashem means ‘blessed be G-d,’ ” I told her, and then I proceeded to explain the full meaning of those two magical words that have been the hallmark of our people since days of yore. The hospital had a negligible Jewish presence, but whenever I come in contact with non-Jews I make a point of following the dictates of our Torah, which calls upon us to be mindful that it is the Divine words from Sinai that evoke respect among the nations.

As a result of that column I received a slew of letters and e-mails, a few of which I published. One of these letters came from a woman who described her ordeal after her husband, an attorney, lost his job because of the financial downturn. Several years had passed and he was still unemployed.

Additionally, she had to struggle with many new and painful issues. She wrote that while in the past she had always said “Baruch Hashem,” she could no longer utter those words. She felt alone, abandoned, enveloped in darkness. However, after she read my column she forced herself to place “Baruch Hashem” on her lips again.

After her letter appeared in The Jewish Press, the most beautiful phone call came to our Hineni office. It was from a gentleman who resides in Boro Park. “I would like to offer employment to that attorney,” he said. “Ask him to call me.” And he left his number.

In a climate where jobs are few and hard to find, to receive such a call is indeed a beautiful testimony to the chesed that was engraved on our hearts by our father Abraham and became part of our Jewish DNA.

Just stop and consider for a moment: Based on a letter in The Jewish Press, a man offers employment to a total stranger and leaves his telephone number. For all he knows, the man could be unstable and create problems in his office. Conventional wisdom dictates “Mind your own business; don’t get involved!” But this man chose to reject that and follow the ways of our Torah.

Now, the woman’s letter had been written anonymously. Most people who write of their personal problems are hesitant to reveal their names. I remembered, however, a very kind lady full of chesed telling me a similar story. After many years of service, her husband was let go and could not find employment. I had difficulty recalling her name. I meet countless people daily, and while I always remember their faces I have given up even attempting to remember their names. After some detective work, I did find a name and a number and made the call.

The woman who answered was overwhelmed by the news but – and here comes the big but – while the facts matched (her husband was an attorney and he had been searching for work for several years), she was not the woman who had written me the letter I published.

“I don’t know if I have the right to give this phone number to my husband,” she said, “since the Rebbetzin had someone else in mind. I would like to hear a decision from a rav as to whether my husband has the right to call this man for a position.”

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Last week I shared a letter from a newly observant Jewish woman. She and her husband reside in a small suburban community outside of Los Angeles. Last year they came to consult with me on a personal religious issue. While they were both ba’alei teshuvah, there was one fine difference between them. He had become a ba’al teshuvah earlier than she and was therefore somewhat more settled in an observant lifestyle.

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis

Over the years I’ve received letters from all over the world in which people share feelings and thoughts they’ve experienced upon becoming became Torah observant. Usually these letters arrive not long after the writers had heard one of my speeches. No matter where a particular speech took place, and no matter whether I spoke the language or had to use a translator, the magic always works. In reality, it’s not magic at all but a little voice in the soul – the “Pintele Yid,” that spark of G-d’s Word engraved on all our neshamahs. Here is one recent letter.

Last week I wrote about the many disappointments in life. So often we dream of something, wish for something, pray for something – only to discover that when it happens, it is not quite the way we envisioned it. I illustrated this concept through a Hungarian story I recalled from my childhood about a little boy who more than anything else wanted a rocking horse, a coveted toy in Hungary.

There is a Hungarian tale I’ve always found meaningful and yet sad. It is about a little boy who always wanted his own rocking horse. (In Hungry a rocking horse was a toy that belonged to only the privileged few.)

For several weeks now we’ve been discussing lack of gratitude – one of the most destructive forces in our society. When people think everything is coming to them, they become selfish, angry individuals. They do not know how to reciprocate. They do not know how to be grateful and, worse still, they become bitter and destructive elements in society. They make miserable sons, daughters and marriage partners. They have no regard for parents, grandparents, Torah teachers and the elderly.

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